Everytime he gets caught, he shares a lame excuse if at all for why he did it. He has been caught cheating since we have been married. It has been 7 years and I am concerned about the trust issue and his lack of respect for the marriage. He recently was caught writing to some girl on the internet that he had an affair with. I don't think he will ever change and likes getting caught in these stupid scenarios.
2006-08-26 21:44:16 · 33 answers · asked by mimi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If he continues to do the same act over and over again - why do you put up with it? Remember the saying ... Fool me once, shame on you, Fool me twice, shame on me? I can not tell you what to do because in the end that is your decision, you need to answer this for yourself and be happy with your decision. If you decide to stay then you will need to accept that he will continue this act as he has shown time and time again. Maybe seek counseling if you need assistance with your choice.
Hugs Mel
2006-08-26 21:50:47 · answer #1 · answered by jaredsmommy2004 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he will continue. Why shouldn't he? You've done nothing but whine a little, every time he cheats. Your husband is an immature jerk, and you are a pathetic, spineless ninny. This seems a perfect match. I urge you to attempt to get pregnant as quickly as possible. You should hurry, because since hubby sleeps with any warm body he can find, he could well bring HIV home any time. That's fine for you two, but you should try to have your kids before you become HIV+. It's better if your children have the chance to start out life not infected with a deadly disease. I'd also suggest that you two avoid acquiring any pets that have a long life. It's always difficult to find new homes for pets, and Hubby could bring home a quick acting strain of aids, so even a puppy might outlive you. Stick with cheap goldfish, or guppies. The good news is that any kids you leave behind should be adopted quickly- assuming they aren't hiv+. So, you stay with hubby, and enjoy your wonderful marriage.
2006-08-26 23:05:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
why dont u try speaking to him abt how u feel of the entire fuss of him getting caught again and again.explain him how miserable it feels and also ask him y is he interested in other females if there is some reason which u can come over and help go ahead and do so if speaking is not helping seek for help thru counselling and counselling also does'nt help then think of an extreme step of divorce.think twice b4 any extreme steps as they may land u in more trouble as well as ur family will also suffer and if u have children do think of them also b4 divorce.
personally men look om to other females only if they r mentally or physically unsatisfied go to the root cause and try to solve problems
u can try to add some spice to ur life by trying out something new.give him some kind of suprises do some thing which he will like and also cherish so he stays glued to u
ALL THE BEST
TK CR
2006-08-26 22:24:54 · answer #3 · answered by mayu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know why he keeps doing it cause you keep allowing him to do it!!And thats by staying with him and not leaving him.Honey this guy is not for you as bad as i hate to say it.He has no morals and he doesnt care for you!For if he did he wouldnt risk loosing you by having a affair!And with anyone ,you know if you do somethiing wrong and the other person just keeps accepting it and never leaves,why hell yea your going to keep doing it!He is to the point im sure he can care less if you did leave .All he would be doing is laying everything he could and when that got old im sure he would want you back then in time he would just start it up again!No he will not change and we cannot change people that took me 10 years to realize,they have to want to change and honey your going to have to give him a reason to want too.By you just taking what he does he isnt going to stop doing anything your going to have to get a backbone and lay the law down and leave him if you have too.WHy worry about him just leave anyways,id rather be alone then to put up with someone cheating on me everytime i turned my back!It isnt right and fair to you and you have feelings and i know it hurts you everytime he does this.So why allow yourself to keep hurting.You can find better it isnt hard!!A dog would almost be better than him!I know it hurts to leave but that pain will ease and finally go but if you continue to stay your always going to hurt and the pain will never go away cause it keeps happing and he wont stop to allow it!!SO best thing for you mind,body,and spirit is to leave!!Good luck dont worry it will be okay and things will get better and you will look back on this day and go gosh i wish i would of left sooner what a waste of my life but at least i got wise and finally left and now im soo happy!!I hope that does happen for you and it will but you have to leave first!!
2006-08-26 22:11:39 · answer #4 · answered by blondie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know what you need to do, unless you like the feeling you get when you find out that he did it again! Leave, dont look back and find someone who will give you respect and love. He doesnt respect or love you, he seems to see you for a fool and you really arent trying to change his mind about that by continuing to take him in time after time. Seven years is a long time and like one the guys wrote earlier, be careful with what he may bring you ( virus) the world is wicked out there and there is this thing called AIDS/HIV that have a way of getting into your body and taking up to 5 yrs to show up! Think about it and think he's worth dieing for?You obviously would die for him but would he for you? From what you wrote I really don't think so. Good luck . Be safe be careful
2006-08-26 22:08:18 · answer #5 · answered by Nikie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably won't ever change. All men cheat. Some will cheat if they have an opportunity, others love to create the opportunity. It is the genetic makeup of men. Either you accept it with the man you love or you divorce and be alone. Even a new man will cheat. Learn more about men and their ways. Although genetic, he is making a choice to cheat which has nothing to do with you and don't ever believe a man if he says you pushed him to it. That is just a line.
2006-08-27 00:33:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have Three Advices Above. And I hope that You have got the Answere. Well, I Must Say-------- Just Leave Such A person Instantly if You Have Financial Support And Support from your Parants . Or Just you can Wait little to gather all these supports. It is Important. But more Important is to Leave / divorce Him. By the Way, Where are you From ?? If you kindly let me know ? If I can assist You from Law Side .
2006-08-26 22:06:20 · answer #7 · answered by intercommerce2003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out to you my mum had the same thing and every day i hated seeing her cry. See you are honoring your vowels where he is not so why should yo suffer i know its hard to leave some one that you have been with for so long and if you have kids its allot harder but its not healthy for you and every time you listen to those bullshit excuses you are letting your self and your family down you sound like a good wife and you sound like you have been faith full so find some one that will do the same for you. GOOD LUCK sweety and don't take the lies any more be strong and walk away from it.
2006-08-26 21:56:55 · answer #8 · answered by sweety yhi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, i think of we've a sparkling certainty coach for publishing that shall we produce and air,"Married women persons and their cheating husbands and Married adult adult males and their cheating different halves". we are able to work out which triumphs on our coach and enable the objective industry watch at abode. i recognize it sound like exploitation and is in a fashion yet while human beings get a actual look at how grotesque it is and what it does we would get to take credit for reversing the divorce fee numbers. Whattya think of? shall we be legends and the final of a dying breed of non cheaters with a objective of fixing an prolonged time of promoted promiscuity by using letting the international see how unfavorable it truly is and who's proffitting from the proceeds. we would even like one yet another as hosts on the coach, you and that i on television helping the international. What an concept!
2016-11-05 21:04:21 · answer #9 · answered by harib 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer to your question. Based on his history, I don't think he will ever change (as you admitted). Since you keep putting up with it, you are only sending him the message that it's okay to keep doing what he's doing. It's been too long already...7 yrs and he hasn't changed despite getting caught. I think it's time you let him know you mean business. You don't have to put up with him disrespecting you anymore. Find yourself someone who will give you the respect your husband isn't giving you.
2006-08-26 22:39:48 · answer #10 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mentioned he doesn't care that he gets caught now.....maybe in a really sick way he is trying to get attention from you and manipulate you into working harder at being an agreeable wife. And he's using this strategy cause he knows you won't leave him. And it's win win for him cause he gets a action on the side too. Just a thought.
2006-08-26 22:43:00 · answer #11 · answered by Tony 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋