How do you repair a marriage once someone has been unfaithful?

Question

Is it impossible? Has anyone else experienced cheating in their relationship? Do either one of you ever recover?

Answer 1

I have been married for 12 years and about 5 years into our marriage, I had an affair. It lasted about 6 months. I did not get caught by my husband, instead I came clean and told him that I was in love with another man that I had been seeing for a while. He was obviously shocked and heartbroken. The point is, you can recover. It is a slow processs and lots of questions needed to be answered for him. It is so important to lay it all out there. He wanted to know the smallest detail, but it helped us in getting past the pain and mistrust.

Answer 2

Wow, that is definitely a relative question. Relative to the particular
circumstances of the individuals in the relationship and the social
mores of wherever you live. You hear a lot of people say that "once
a cheater, always a cheater" but I do not think that is true at all. The
tough part is distinguishing between something salvagable and a
hopeless cause. That can be real tough because all of the emotions
involved. I was married twice and want to reconcile with my wife
and she had an affair. I am certain it will never happen again and
would not even consider getting back together if I weren't . It depends
a lot on you too. Can you forgive? I mean REALLY forgive. If not, forget
it and move on. The sad thing about cheating is that I think a lot more
people have done it at some point than they will admit. I would say
if all else is good, work it out with definite guidelines to ensure that it
never happens again. Good Luck!!!

Answer 3

First of all make certain that u both want to make your marriage work. If u do, then sit down and be totally honest(even if it is gonna hurt) with each other about y the other cheated and how u both feel about the marriage and what the other can possibly do to make things better for the other. It will take time to be able to trust again, both of u have to work at it. If necessary and u both agree go to a marriage counselor, u both have to want this marriage to work and work to make it or it will never last.

Answer 4

I personally don't think there is a marriage out there that's perfect and faithful. It happens . To some people it happens in the first few years to others it takes longer. Eventually it happens.
Do you recover?
well it depends. You mean forgive the other person. probably
or if it's you who cheated on the other you might never recover.
IT's easier to forgive the other than yourself..
try counseling if you want to save the marriage - especially if you have children

Answer 5

It takes a very special and strong person to forgive and forget. Most cannot. The affair remains forever in your head and at the first sign of trouble out it pops. To trust this person again takes time and sometimes it never happens. It is so much easier and more convenient to get a divorce nowadays then to rebuild a broken relationship. This is why most opt for a divorce after an affair. Most of our lives are patterned after TV soaps and many are living one. In dealing with many couples facing this over the years, not many were willing to even try to rebuild because of the loss of trust in the marriage and the pain.

Answer 6

It's possible to repair the relationship but the effort has to come from both parties. You have to learn how to trust him again and it's going to take a lot of hard work on your part. He has to learn to earn that trust back by not cheating on you again. It is NOT impossible.

Answer 7

It depend whether do you still want to keep the relationship on, honestly once the trust is broken it is difficult to mend it. To start all over again, you must ask yourself will you forget about everything he/she has done wrong? If you are certain you can, then give your marriage another chance and be honest to know what when wrong and seek help if needed. All the best.

Answer 8

Going by my exp. I would say find out what the problem is. In my case it was bordom and no sex. We worked it out and have been together for 8yrs. But it only works when both are honest and can trust each other. If that can't happen move on. Hate to be harsh but that's the facts.

Answer 9

Both of us cheated during our marriage, and are trying to recover from it, it hurts, but if we love each other we will make it work, and thats what were doing right now. It can recover, but you will always think the other mate is still cheating.

Answer 10

I went thru it. I did everything to try and save our marriage after her 2nd affair but when I found out about the third I called it quits. I did everything she said I needed to do and she just lied to everyone. So it depends on the people involved. Do they want to work things out or are they playing? Only they know.