My friend is really mean, and she talks about everyone we know behind their back and says how much she hates them and stuff but when she is with them she acts like their best friend. She is just not any fun to be around since she is manipulative and makes everything about her. But she's also a recovering bulimic and when we exclude her from activities because we don't really enjoy being around her, she blames her entire eating disorder on us and says that when we "ditch her" it just makes her recovery harder. I don't want to push her back to being where she was with her eating disorder but I also can't stand being around her. What should I do?
2006-08-26 06:23:50 · 21 answers · asked by keiko 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
This is a nasty, malicious person. No one is responsible for her eating disorder but her. It sounds like she has a personality disorder as well. It is not up to you to heal her or to be her friend. She will pull you down to her level. Tell her you are busy and move on. You can find nicer girls to be friends with.
2006-08-26 06:29:05 · answer #1 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the thing is, you have to ditch her however, you have to do it nicely since she's recovering frm a eating disorder, this might be the very thing that might push her back into it. you have to talk to her and tell her what you think of her but do not tell her that she's mean. just tell her that shes not very fun to be around anymore and that shes making you feel...
2006-08-26 13:46:46 · answer #2 · answered by Sunrise 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why be around someone that aint joyful for being around? If shes talking about other people behind their backs whats to say she's not talking behind yours eigther? As for her eating disorder I wouldn't let that affect yourself thats her concern and only one person can truelly deal with that and thats her NOT you. dont let her fool you its not your fault and its not a good thing staying friends with someone who guilts you into staying friends with them its ALWAYS a bad ending in the end! Believe me I've been there and done it its not fun.
Remeber:
If their not fun to be around, and not a good enough person to be mature and not talk behind peoples backs, and shes manipulative, chances are shes not a good person to be around and she dont seem like a true friend. I WOULDN"T HANG OUT WITH HER.
2006-08-26 13:30:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Youll realize itd be best if you were'nt. Sometimes its better not to be friends with someone This is one of them. Youre life will be a lot simpler. i had a friend like that. Shed be best freidns with people to their face and when they left, shed talk so muchshit about them. then i found out she did the same tome. This girl will do anything for attention nomatter who she back stabs. Shes 'starved' for attention....bulemic...ha! never mind bad joke. You wont even remeber her that much in like 3 or 4 years.
2006-08-26 13:27:35 · answer #4 · answered by Baby Jack born 4/5/09 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't keep seeing a friend that would put the blame on me for their failings. I think that you can help someone, but you're not responsible for her, and she shouldn't put the blame of that on you or your other friends.
And, if she's talking bad about everybody else behind their back, you can be sure she's doing the same to you.
2006-08-26 13:29:09 · answer #5 · answered by Roberto 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like a terrible friend. She should NEVER blame her eating disorder on friends that she truly values. Therefore, I say just ignore her and get on with your life. She isn't worth your time.
2006-08-26 13:29:18 · answer #6 · answered by happy311 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first problem I see here is that your friend is not willing to accept responsibility for her own issues. I can understand your concern about not wanting to see her go through those same problems again, but don't let her hold *her* issues over *your* head, either.
The second problem is that you seem to have a poor selection process when it comes to your friends. Anyone who will gossip *with* you is just as quick to gossip *about* you.
2006-08-26 13:29:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think she is the worst manipulative person ever!
you are not the cause of her disease and she has to learn how to maintain friends
maybe she is upset and she does all this act just to have some friends cause maybe she thinks she is going to end up alone
so..take your time and talk to her but she cannot blame you
ok?
2006-08-26 13:27:45 · answer #8 · answered by miliscal123 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you know what to do. Don't let her hold a medical condition over your head. You don't need that sort of B.S. in your life. Suround yourself with true friends. Not a group of losers.
I vote for dumping her.
2006-08-26 13:29:33 · answer #9 · answered by acidcrap 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it isnt easy having a friend ilke that i know,the best way to let your friend go is not the talk 2 her as much.when she calls dont answer @ wait a couple hour or a day.or just tell her the truth.maybe if she heres it it will help.
2006-08-26 13:40:07 · answer #10 · answered by tooz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋