Hey im a 16 yr old girl and has had a boyfriend for over 7 months who is 18. He has helped me out alot however he gets mad very easily and he has alot of anger issues but he treats me very well. However i think i lost the connection we used to have. i still love him but i dont no if i want to be with him anymore. How do i let him no this in a way where we cans till be close friends because he means alot to me and i still wnat him to be a part of my life, i jsut think its best if we tkae a break. what should i do?
2006-08-25 18:51:41 · 11 answers · asked by GDsoccer3 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
say i want to take a break and i dont really want a boyfriend right now for a while, i still love u but just not right now. i hope we can stay friends during this period. hope this hleps and good luck
2006-08-25 18:55:58 · answer #1 · answered by aznboyjohn 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I know where you are coming from. I was not allowed to date until I was 16 and I have been with the same person ever since. We had lost our connection a couple of times, but always found our way back.
Honestly, tell him that you feel that you have moved apart, in many ways and that you need some time away from him to find your way. If it is meant to be, you both will make your way back into each other lives. Tell him also that in order to have a relationship with someone, you need to find yourself, and he needs to find himself. My soon to be husband and I have been together for 8 years and he also has some anger issues, but I just have to remind him from time to time that everything is okay and he does not have to be mean.
Also, NEVER say that there is "no one else" or "we need to be on a break". Guys think that there is someone else then. Tell him that you will be honest always and he can feel free to talk to you as much as you two need to talk to each other. But remember to set boundaries so you can accompish something and figure stuff out. I hope that this helps you. Good luck!
2006-08-26 02:43:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you need a break. If you need an excuse, tell him you need to focus on school (and then do) or other activities. If you've been having sex with him, it could be statutory rape in your jurisdiction and he could go to jail if you continue and get caught, so that's another good reason to mention to him.
Guys generally do not like to hear, "Let's just be friends" it's the kiss of death so to speak.
You mention his anger issues and I can't help but wonder about that. Are you scared that breaking up with him will trigger him to hurt you? Are you worried that he could eventually turn on you phsically or verbally? Is he mean to your friends, behind their backs or otherwise?
You need time alone to see where you want your life to go. 16 is a magic age and full of changes in your life. Sometimes, you need time (even as an adult) without any restraints on your time so that you can make decisions and focus on what you need.
2006-08-26 02:54:15 · answer #3 · answered by DJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, us guys dont quite understand breaks. I've noticed something. Guys are more into: devotion, loyalty, ready to do anything for his girl. Girls are more into: Feelings, emotion, passion, setting the right moment, expressing romanticly. Am I right or is that just me? Anywho, he's not going to understand and he's going to get depressed real quick. He's also going to think its his fault, he's going to ask you if he's done something wrong. It will hurt him for you to say, "How about we just be friends?" than if you slap him in his face and tell him he's a pig! thats just how guys are. There's no way for you to break off the relationship without it hurting him. But before you dump him (I know thats a harsh term, but its what your doing) before you dump him, tell him about the connection you think you've lost, give him a chance to build it back. Guys also have this problem of getting distracted. The connection you had isn't lost its probably just neglected. Its not that he doesnt love you, life is just so hard for guys to think about. After awhile they get tired and they just don't think with the heart. Just remind him to show you he loves you. haha. or better yet ask a friend to tell him, that way he'll think he's surprising you. Good luck.
2006-08-26 02:04:08 · answer #4 · answered by kk_jediknight 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he sounds like he could possibly become a control freak or an abuser someday. no, seriously. that's how it starts out. if he's only 18 and has anger problems, that's not good, and i would be afraid to get into a relationship with somebody like that. you should just tell him that you want to be single for a while and need a break , see how he reacts to that. if he gets really mad at first then buys you something after that, that's what those type do. just be friends, if possible. sometimes it's hard to be friends after a relationship though. good luck, and don't feed into it, ok?
2006-08-26 01:57:56 · answer #5 · answered by jan 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well, you are very young so you have allot more love ahead of you.Just tell him that you feel like you've lost the connection that you guys used to have together.tell him you want him in your life but not as a boyfriend.also if he has some anger issues.....do it in a mall or something....
2006-08-26 01:58:22 · answer #6 · answered by summer 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it is not working out band that he is not the one for you. If he is interested in remaining your friend he will be. If not he will tell you so. There is no such thing as taking a break in a relationship. You are either in a relationship or you are not. No in between. Remember that. It will come in handy.
2006-08-26 02:04:00 · answer #7 · answered by LORD Z 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
be honest up front and do it in a public place so if he does get angry he is most likely not to get aggressive. 2nd you wont be close friends anymore if you get involved with another man he will certainly ge jealous. just do it fast and to the point good luck.
2006-08-26 02:40:13 · answer #8 · answered by q-fire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is the trouble, you should tell him that i am sorry, i still want to be close friends w/ u and i still care about you very much but i don't feel the same as i used to SORRY... mail me back if u use this advice and if it works see ya later.
2006-08-26 02:48:41 · answer #9 · answered by hailee j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the myth of lets just be friends rarely works. if it is over then it is over. if you had been just friends then dating you might have a chance but basically you have to accept that you may lose him completely.
2006-08-26 01:56:42 · answer #10 · answered by rwl_is_taken 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋