ok my best friend is dating this guy and they are really in love and all but there is one thing that i was blind to know about him and now i do.... he is controlitive with my best friend like he wants her all to himself and he doesnt like her talk to her guys friend and me ME i am her friend and she is the only best friend i have and she moved to another school so it was hard for me to accpet the fact that she is moving and yeah and all i can do to keep in touch is email, phone, or online so yeah and if she like dont listen to him he would be mad and break up with her and all and she gave her heart to him and yeah... he wants her to delete all the guys in her buddy list and like last night she was just messing with the guys that have crushes on her and he got mad and yeah and my friend doesnt need another person to control her when her mom does that . its like he doesnt even trust her at all ,i want to tell her but i dont want her to be hurt or end the relationship they have so help!
2006-08-25 17:50:45 · 15 answers · asked by mrmach@sbcglobal.net 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
when i say mad i mean if she doesnt listen to her and all then he thinks of breaking up with her
2006-08-25 17:52:34 · update #1
i mean when she doesnt listen to him******
2006-08-25 17:53:51 · update #2
u being her best friend, better tell her that this guy is nuts and is goinna ruin her life being with him.
Forget if shes gonna not like what she hears from you or may for that matter break-up with you. Am sure she will understand that you were being true and she will come back to you.
2006-08-25 18:05:46 · answer #1 · answered by sree 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, it sounds like this guy has been burned before and your best friend may end up catching the brunt of his mistrust. She may be the rebound girlfriend. The fact that he is isolating her from all that she knows is not a good sign. Usually control freaks are abusers. First they isolate you then they break down your self-esteem either verbally or physically or both. The reason he doesn't want her socializing with you is because he views you as his biggest threat and your friend's biggest influence. As long as you aren't around then he is free to do as he pleases and she won't question it.
You can tell her that he's no good but it could backfire on you. So be very cautious when broaching the subject with her.
2006-08-31 10:54:27 · answer #2 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm going through a similar situation. My best friend is so addicted to her boyfriend and vice versa. I guess, everything is up to your best friend. If she still wants to be in a relationship with him, there's really nothing you can do to help. Plus, if she's really into her man, chances are she is not going to listen to you. Then the friendship may hurt and end. In my situation, i let my best friend have a relationship with her man. I'm just there to support her and talk to her once in a while. (yes, i have to say that the friendship btw us has changed, yet we're still some what close). The best advice i can give it to you is just let her and him have their relationship. Find the right time to talk to her about her relationship, if she and this man just start going out..w.e you say, she may not even want to listen.
If anything, email me.
2006-08-26 01:02:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well my love, I know how he is, and him and I are friends.. He is a close friend of mine, and you say your worried about him and my relationship being ruined, but if he would want to end our friendship for not seeing that what he is doing is wrong than im not sure if I wanted to be friends with someone like that in the first place.. You know I love you and respect you so do what your heart tells you to do, and know that im behind you all the way.. I love you
"BTW im her BF... just so that noone freaks out lol"
2006-08-26 01:56:16 · answer #4 · answered by Bryan G 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was married young (while still in high school). I'm 22 now. It has been a nightmare. If he is controlling her now it will never stop. Her life will be a mind game. Let her know this now; she may not listen, and this is her choice. Remember that!!!!!
Sometimes in life you must let go of the things you love reguardless of the pain. Remember she is her own soul and you are not to control it no matter what!!
2006-08-26 01:23:13 · answer #5 · answered by senia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my boyfriend was the same way when he and I got together . . I wouldn't call it being controlling . . it's just he wants to close the door to all other men who might be trying to work their way into her life . . I know that you might say that you and her are "just friends" . . so are you saying that you never thought that she would make a great girl for yourself? . . and even if you haven't . . how do you know that you never will?! . . it just cuts off a lot of "potential" problems . . . just accept that your friend is in love and if she's happy, respect her relationship and her man . . .
2006-09-02 21:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by ♥LoisLane♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i think yor best friend better hav some words with him alone. Now they are only boyfriend & girlfriend relationship but what would happen if they are married?? Is he Gonna tie her up when he is away for work? Better tell yor best friend to hav a 2nd thought if she wants to be with him. This sort of relationship isn't Healthy.
2006-09-02 04:41:00 · answer #7 · answered by william 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your friend that she needs to talk to her boyfriend about trusting her. A relationship like that is doomed to fail. Your friend will live in misery and constant fear of makeing her boyfriend jealous. Please get your friend to read this. Tell her she deserves to be able to associate with anyone she wants. Her boyfriend is over-possesive. This will lead to big problems in the future.
good luck!
2006-08-26 00:57:01 · answer #8 · answered by T-Jay 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to sit her down and say: look, i respect that you care about this guy and all, but he has no right to tell you who you can be friends with and who you can't. if you disagree, then you are not in a relationship- you are his slave. no person who truly loves another tells them who they can and who they can not associate with!
love is about respect and trust. it's obvious that this guy has neither- he doesn't love her- he just loves controlling her. bottom line- you have got to get her to understand how unhealthy this relationship is.
2006-08-26 01:09:13 · answer #9 · answered by miss advice 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i was bein controlled by my ex. my bestfriend could see this. she excepted that i would see it myself one day and it was only a matter of time before it got to me. and hey ho. we have finished and i am able to use my computer again and i have my friends. she will see it all oh so soon. sit back and just help her through it when she does...good luck x
2006-09-02 13:54:34 · answer #10 · answered by loopy lass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋