What is your all time favorite telemarketer comeback?

Question

Aren't you annoyed with those f*ing telemarketers and refinancing callers? Don't you hate it when you are crapping and the phone rings and you thought it was important so you hurry up and it turns out to be pointless?? If so, what is your favorite hang up technique to annoy them back?

What I do is when they speak in spanish I would always say "que?" a lot... and i continue to say que for about 3 mins and then say "no habla espanol" then hang up... serves them right messin with my shittin'

Telemarketers call all the time at home. One time my prof. called me at home about school stuff and my dad answered. He thought it was a telemarketer and said to my prof, "who the fck is this?" and said "I'm not fcking interested" and hung up. My prof called again and explained who he is. It was hella funny when my dad was apologizing to my prof. lol. telemarketers sometimes ruin relationships you know.

Answer 1

I love it when they call...I answer the usual "Hello" and then they immediately go into their little speech. About 5 seconds into it I say "Hello?" again. They stop and usually say, "Can you hear me?" I'll wait another second and then say for the last time, "Hello?!" Then I hang up. Heh heh heh...

Answer 2

Hahah My favorite is the one from Seinfeld. It goes something like this.

Telemarketer: Hello blah blah blah blah blah

U: I'm sorry I'm kinda busy right now. Do you mind giving me you home phone number so I can call you back

Telemarketer: No

U: Oh so you don't like it when people call you about this sort of thing.

Telemarketer: no

U: well now you know how I feel.

It goes something like that it's not word for word. When I first saw it I laughed my @ss off. However they might give you the number so I just put the phone down on the table let them talk for about 5 min and then come back. Waste their time for wasting mine.


What I really Really hate are those telemarketers that use the machine and you can't talk to them. That ruins everything.

Answer 3

Usually they call my grandmother, not me (who knows why?). She doesn't get so many visitors even though I & other family members go round when we can, so this provides her with much needed entertainment... she's not bad at stringing them along for 86...

They call asking for my grandfather ... "Sorry, he's been dead for more than 4 years" (true) Oh, I'm sorry Mrs. L, I didn't know "Oh, neither does anyone else, and they still haven't figured out I buried him under the rose bush yet" *click*

They call trying to sell her a stairlift... some kind of car implement for elderly drivers, double glazing...etc.... she'll let them rattle on for ages and hum along with the info, ask questions etc... then when it starts getting serious, will let them know... oh, i live in a ground-floor apartment... I don't drive... i already have longlife insulating glass windows... etc .... usually results in *click* as they really have no way of dealing with someone who's got plenty of time and a twisted sense of humour, rather than an easily irritated 30-something with no patience.

Or the classic "congratulations, you've won a family holiday cruise (just pay us £4000000 booking fees and airport transfers)" ... again... play along... "oh! i haven't got a passport... i'm on a low income pension... and my family all live in australia" (none are true) *click*

Must have wasted so many outbound call centre man-hours so far. Love it.

My own response would be a rather more terse "and what evil thing did you do that means you can't get a proper job, such as working as a cleaner at the national blood bank?" and a click at my own end.
Or I'll get about twenty seconds into a call with them and just press the hook button in the middle of a word. Doubt they'd expect that as most people would just slam the phone down instead, giving them a second to mute their earpiece before that rather loud ker-click echoes through.

What I want to try now, though, if they ever call my new mobile... it has the option to play back sound files whilst doing pretty much else... it may well work whilst calling... cue up a bland bit of instrumental music.. "wait a second, i'll just have to put you on hold whilst i try to transfer you to my house phone" - start music, go make a cup of tea (done that before with our old micro-tape based answering machine - recorded a quarter hour of after-hours TV test music on side B, very simple to flip & wind the tape whilst keeping them talking)... or cue up some of the (shockingly loud) gameshow sound effects someone bluetoothed to me for use as message alerts...... "and our survey said" (Family Fortunes "NO!" noise) "you fail!" -click-

ehehehe

Answer 4

Since I signed the no calls from solicitors, I do not get that many but
every once in a while when I do get a call , I just interupt them and
say loudly NO MONEY...Then I spell the word BROKE and if
they haven't hung up on me yet, then I tell them how high my bills
are and that I can't pay my own and then go on and on and on
until either they or I hang up. They never call back after this.
ha ha lol

Answer 5

with caller ID and a phone that says the number calling me I just don't answer the phone. Most 800 numbers are usually telemarketers.

Answer 6

I like when you get on the phone and after you are sure it is a telemarketer, start to breath real hard and making moaning noises. And they usually get the hint and hang up!

Answer 7

I love telemarketers.... every time they call I let them go through there entire sales plan and i act like I'm real interested then when they're done yappin' I ask them if they like wasting there own time and then I hang up on them.... I get a great laugh every time...

Answer 8

one day this idiot actually called my mobile and asked if my mum or dad was there? (Im 23 and I have a son myself) i said,

"excuse me?"

and he proceeded...

"is your mum or dad there please?"

then i asked "whos that?"

and he said, "its Ivan from Optus"

i replied, "well, Ivan, you have actually called my mobile, im 23 years old and i dont live with my parents, but i'll let them kno you called, you idiot!"

other than that, i would normally use the - ask them to hold for a min and hang up 10 minutes later or i just say "no sorry you cant have my money" and hang up.

im surprised any business would even bother to use this method of advertising and promoting anymore!

Answer 9

Okay, so the call goes one of two ways. First way is short and sweet - 2nd way is my "favorite".

First scenario -
You - "hello"
TM - "good evening Mr. Smith, I am *** with XYZ company and I'm calling to ask you a couple questions about **"
You - "great"
TM - "blah blah blah..."
You - "can you hold on a minute someones at my door
THEN...... you put the phone down and leave it there for 20 minutes. Go about your business. After 20 minutes put it back on the hook.

2nd Scenario - my "favorite"
You - "Hello"
TM - "Hello may I speak to Mr. or Mrs. Smith"
You - gasping.... "oh my God, you want Mr. Smith? ... screech... then say "He didn't tell me he was married!" Hang up.

So, there ya have it.

Answer 10

Set the phone in front of the TV and hang up in 5 nim.