how do i get over a very bad jelousey problem?

Question

I am very jelouse when it comes to my bf and other girls. I feel like if he always looks at other girls and i have no self esteem. If a pretty girl comes out on tv i feel like if he thinks she looks better than me and i feel ugly. He tells me that im the most beautiful girl to him and that he dosent need to look at other girls because he has everything he wants and needs here.Well a year ago after i gave birth to his son i found out that he was watching Girls Gone Wild, while i was asleep in bed next to him.

Answer 1

You won't find a man alive that doesn't like to look at beautiful women. That doesn't mean he thinks any less of you or will be unfaithful. Make sure that you don't let him see all of your insecurities and jealousy or that could push him away. Try acting confidend and indifferent towards him looking at other women and pretty soon you may really feel that way. No matter who you are, there will always be somebody prettier, skinnier, more attractive or smarter than you. That's life! Just be happy that you have found someone that thinks YOU are the best!

Answer 2

Hi. Just because he was watching Girls Gone Wild doesn't mean he doesn't love you. This isn't just jealousy....you seem to be really insecure...somehow you think that now you've had the baby you aren't as attractive to him anymore. This is not uncommon with new mothers and is partly hormone-related.

My advice is to RELAX. Based on what he's said, he loves you. The stuff on tv is just harmless fantasy stuff. A lot of guys (and girls I might add) watch things like this...and it doesn't mean anything at all. It's no different than if you fantasized about some buff guy you saw in the movies or TV. Some couples watch that stuff together, or even racier stuff, and some even find it to be a turn on that spices up their love life.
If you want to help get rid of your insecurity problem, try doing some things to feel better/sexier...buy yourself some sexy outfit or lingerie (and surprise him with it!), go to a day spa and get the massage treatment, tanning, whatever you like...maybe you could just spontaneously engineer some romantic encounter as surprise for both you and him....candles in the bedroom, music playing, stuff like that. These are just a few off-the-cuff ideas. You will find that he still thinks you are just as hot as ever.

Answer 3

I have known too many girls like you and the most they accomplish is pushing their guy out the door. You can stop this by trusting him when he tells you about your beauty and how much he loves you. I don't know how any woman can not expect their man to not look at another woman. If he is not doing it in a way that belittles or really hurts you, then you really have grounds for anger if not then you should take a good look in the mirror and find what he sees, accentuate one it for him to see more of. If he woke up in bed next to you watching a bunch of bouncy boobs, count your blessings!!! This alone should tell your where his heart lies. Don't be suspicious or jealous until you need to be. Let him have his GGW before you send him MIA.

Answer 4

well i feel the same way sometimes but u know jus look at the real part of it them gurls on tv think bout it how he gone get wit one of them if he wit u when a guy tell u that u r the most beautifulist gurl in the world in ur heart it is gonna tell u wheater he is telling the truth or not u have 2 think now a tv show u should not wworry bout it only when it comes 2 gurls that r next 2 him flirting and winking at him u need 2 let ur problem go and show that he is UR MAN nobody elses and u want 2 keep him

Answer 5

You are right, you do have a self-esteem problem. My best advice for people who have low self-esteem is to tell them to go out and volunteer somewhere. Make a difference in the world and/or people who really need help getting their basic needs taken care of. It's amazing how it makes you feel to know that you are contributing to the world in a positive and meaningful way. You may even find that, once you've made this commitment, you aren't interested in a guy who only likes you for your looks.

Answer 6

there is nothing wrong with you . i had a bf just like that and we are not together. the guy is lusting for other women. and i dont care what no one says on yahoo it is wrong and disrespectful. its a different in seeing and lusting. dont let anyone tell you this is ok. lust is one of the 7 deadly sins. he has the problem. its not that you are insecure with yourself its just you have a bf that shows you he probably cant be trusted. if he does it in your face what is he doing behind your back. girl dont listen to the people who tell you are wrong. i mean for real. that guy is wrong. they say that most men are like that. but that still doesnt make it right. he dead wrong. in gods eyes if a man lust for another women he might as well had committed the act.

Answer 7

I would suggest that you get some counciling to improve your self esteem and also develop hobbies that make you feel good about yourself...your husband should be supportive of these things. When you feel like your the sh*t, you will also feel like you have no competition.....but you should take care of this quickly...how annoying it must be for your husband to constantly reassure you that you are the only woman in his life

Answer 8

I would suggest that you use subliminal therapy to help you with this. Go to brainsync.com. You won't regreat it. You can also look into the AIM program (EM2) for balancing your energies.

I grew up with a woman named Carolyn who was jealous, controlling and possessive of everyone around her. I'll tell you what happened to her: She is still living...she is alone, lonely and has no one. She sits around and reminds everyone on a regular basis how miserable she feels because no one comes to visit. She buys expensive gifts for people to lure them into coming to visit. She has no hobbies, no motivation to make something of her life, and she sits around and eats all day (she a very big woman). Who wants to be around her? It's very sad isn't it?

Your husband loves you...he wants you back and he wants to have fun with you. Take some responsibility and don't start blaming or trying to drive him away...do something about it! You are so lucky to have people in your life that love and care for you.

The difference between you and Carolyn would be your willingness to do something about it before you lose everything in your life...including your husband, or several husbands, and children.

Answer 9

oh my GOD !! you do need to beleive him that u are beautiful,all men seem to like looking at risque' ladies, Heck at least he's only LOOKING.... when you catch him looking look with him,give you opinion of how you view her, My hubby has this thing with nudie-pictures, he plasters them in his shop,key rings,back of his eye-lids (for when hes sleeping)haha... I finally told him if he didnt be careful, I might just decide to start the LOOKING at those girls before he has a chance to do the drooling, he might be cleaning up my slobber.One other thing if your partner in life tells you something,you should beleive them without any reservatiions....(until proved otherwise) jealousy is a self-ego-orientation...not outer-ego....KNOW YOUR THE BEST....HE CHOSE YOU!

Answer 10

just forget the whole stuff about him get his butt kicked ot of ur life