I am a medical professional who spends a great deal of time in physician offices. Today while I was taking paperwork into one of the offices I encountered a woman who is now married to one of my ex's. We normally do not speak when we see each other in passing but I decided that I would politely say "hello" to her today. However, she glared and kept walking.
A little history.......
1. The ex and I parted on friendly terms. His wife and I have not ever had any problems in the past.
2. I am happily married. (to a guy who happens to have been friends with her brother since high school)
3. Professionally, we are at opposite sides of the corporate ladder. I am blessed to be almost at the top and she is a receptionist.
What do you think the problem is? How would you approach her in the future? Serious answers only.
2006-08-25 08:10:27 · 25 answers · asked by Amanda B 2 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
She has only been with the company for 4-6 weeks.
2006-08-25 08:42:30 · update #1
It may have nothing to do with your history. You abruptly changed the nature of your relationship when you decided to speak to her after you both have ignored each other for so long.
Since you are someone who has a great deal of power compared to her position in the organization, she might be suspicious or angry that you have ignored her for so long and, therefore, unwilling to go along with you as you suddenly appear to be having a good day.
If you want to build a more amicable relationship with her, it will take time and sincerity.
It was a nice gesture, but will require a bit more work.
2006-08-25 08:29:47 · answer #1 · answered by bigbadboss.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is only one way to treat her - professionally. At this point in your lives, that is all you are to each other. Perhaps the fact that you said hello in the office and the fact that she ignored you is an indication as to why you are closer to the top of the ladder than she is. Just be a professional and don't worry about how she feels or acts.
2006-08-25 08:24:48 · answer #2 · answered by Madhouse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its just a instinctual rival thing. If we lived a more "natural" life (no technology and out in the wild), you would essentially be a rival who in the past had been with "her man" and therefore she has enough "proof" that her man could be attracted to you again and take away her support for her kids. Since we are designed to naturally want to keep our own genetic lines going and you are a "threat" to her genetic line continuing, she dislikes you. While you know you don't want to get back with him, she feels every woman wants him like she does and especially you (who once was someone who did want him like she does now) and so she treats you as a threat. Nothing more than that.
I would suggest either ignoring her as well, or continuing along your present choice with saying hello and moving on. Keep it civil, but you don't need to do any more than that.
2006-08-25 08:19:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the information and background that you gave, my assumption is that the problem is simply jealousy.
I think you should wait for a good opportunity. With the connections that you share, the opportunity should come soon enough.
Be honest with her. Tell her what you have observed and ask her what needs to be done to keep the peace for the sake of family.
Communication is the key to any relationship.
Good luck to you.
2006-08-25 08:57:39 · answer #4 · answered by Doogie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people tend to not be able to notice others around them, but that's ok since they are just blur or have something in their mind. But some like to ignore people (pretending they do not see you or do not hear your greetings or just wave without even looking at you - very rude), even they know the other person and have no conflict between them. Sometimes just because they are jealous of you (might be your case).
2006-08-25 08:20:45 · answer #5 · answered by jlryan87 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate how people just walk passed when you have a nice comment to say to them.....
I would just continue to be polite to her and say hello to her like it didn't even bother you that she glared at you. She is the one that probably has issues and may be intimidated by you!
2006-08-25 08:17:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I would just ignore her at this point, you tried to be the better person by saying hello and she couldn't get over herself... so since you probably wont run into her that often, I would just ignore her until she tries to say hello, which may never happen! This is her issue, not yours!
2006-08-25 08:17:12 · answer #7 · answered by Jill 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with being polite. You may have caught her by surprise since you normally don't speak to each other. I'd just try and be friendly.
2006-08-25 08:16:39 · answer #8 · answered by L3-knightw1zard 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious she doesn't want to be friends with you and that's understandable because you have had sex, cuddling, slept with her husband imagine having that mental image every time she sees you, it may not bother you but it does her I would imagine. She could have just said hello but she didn't.leave it a alone
2006-08-25 08:49:09 · answer #9 · answered by callman51 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the ex-wife so she will always see you as compaction and it sounds like she is jealous of you and the fact that you had him before and are doing better then she is. Just smile and be pollite and ignore her negativity.
2006-08-25 08:16:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋