why do we beg guys that treat us so bad?

Question

i left my husband because all he did was treat me like i was a nobody and just told me he didnt want to have anything to do with me at all, that he was just sick of me accusing him of cheating, gosh he wouldnt come home til 12, 1, 2am sometimes not at all every single day, he would never answer any of my call, never. Yes, i know is pretty clear but why do i keep calling him why do i keep begging him if he treats me so shiety why do i still hope that things between us will get better? we have 2 girls and its been 3 days since i left, and not even cuz i called him, he asks for the girls. i need to stop calling him, he says i do is call him to accuse him of things, when i just ask him how hes doing, how school is going, just because i said his schools end pretty late10:30pm he started saying there i was thinking he was somewhere instead at school!

Answer 1

You dont trust him and he gives you reason not to. Then he stands back and says its all your fault. Your stuck in a terrible cycle. Its usually human nature to run towards people who are backing away from you. You think you can make it better. But the truth is he is not doing his part. He stays out late and then wonders why you think he's cheating. If he didn't want this drama in his life or if there was really nothing going on they why does he stay out so late ? You need to realize that your going to be unhappy with this guy. He is not willing to work with you and your distrust towards him.

Answer 2

this dude needs some space

and if he was cheating on you, that's a sign that you guys have some relationship problems you need to work out

you've been gone from him from 3 days. he cheated on you, but you call him so much. apparently you still love him, right

maybe you're obsessed.
there's something about being with him, that might give you some security that you can't find in your friendships or relationships with anybody else you know
it may seem to validate you somehow... that to have him around makes you feel important.
Then again, you may be in love with Love itself and when you're in that state, it's hard to see the things that are bad about that guy, and even when they push you away, you can't seem to get control of yourself because you are addicted. I know

you need time apart from him and you need to ball your eyes out. When you have the urge to call him, call a close friend who will listen, and ball your eyes out to them. If you need to, get in touch with a clinic with a therapist, and ball your eyes out there. Only then will you get time to talk it out, cuss, scream, let all your emotion out, and then when you start thinking clearer, you can see better the signs of if he is really worth it or not. The time apart thing is hard, but that's what you gotta do.

It may take years before you can go into new healthy relationships again without your heart tied up around him, I know. But if you really wanna free yourself of him, and you should, 'cause it sounds like an addiction, then that's what you gotta do.

Besides, your kids are watching you, and your behaviors. You wanna set them up with positive relationship/break-up dealing skills. 'Cause we all have them you know.

Hugs, and good luck

Answer 3

If you left him, leave him alone for a while until he misses you, honey. Just put down the phone and don't call. Once a week, let the kids talk to him on the phone. It won't take long before he's crawling back. Badgering a man will surely drive him away.

Answer 4

Your panicking, relax, you don't need him. You will be ok, so will your kids. Your all better off without him. You said you have girls? Do you want them to be treated that way someday? Show them now that they don't have to and shouldn't. It's not easy to leave, it's harder to make the right choice for your kids, even when it's not what you want.....but is that truly what you want or are you just afraid? I was too, it took me a while to realize I was more afraid of living the rest of my life like that than I was to just do it.

Answer 5

Could be low self esteem. I notice that women who demand to be respected and treated right are much more likely to be with someone who treats you good. Us men are like dogs, when we do something bad, you need to correct us immediately, or we'll just keep doing it. And if he don't learn, take him to the pound and get rid of him. A guy can only treat you bad if you are willing to put up with it.

Answer 6

Darlin, the reason u can't break away is familiarity, you're used to what u have and he's got u thinking u don't deserve any better!

Time for u to look out for urself and kids, have the willpower to not call and not go to him for any reason!

There are support groups for this. Find one!

Answer 7

Remember you left him right? It should be the other way around, him calling you. you should just leave him alone, he does sound like a jerk, he just wants to be apart of his childrens life, time to move on. If hes accusing you, its the other way around, hes the one that is cheating.....

Answer 8

They are a challenge. Most women have low self esteem that go back to men that treat them badly. They are convinced they will not be able to find anyone any better.

Answer 9

maybe some of us are just scared of being on our own that we want to have a guy there even though he is a piece of trash. it happened to me but i am only in high school so i have no clue what it feels like to have to be married to a shity guy all i can tell you gurl is drop him like he the sack of **** he is and find you a better man that will treat you right cause there is one out there

Answer 10

I hate when women I have dated accuse me of mesing around. Change your accusing ways and maybe he will come around. By the way they say that when you accuse someone of cheating it is because you're guilty of doing it yourself...and that's very true.