I mean no disrespect but am looking for an honest answer?

Question

While attendind the HIV/AIDS conference in Toronto, I attended a presetation by a Kenyan man who teaches gender equality to Kenyan men. Yet, when this man was offstage he siad that "Kenyan woman enjoy a good beating once in awhile. They like it cause it shows their men are strong and virile. And if they don't get beat they are dissapointed". This is not an exageration in any way. This made me sick to my stomach that this man is an "educator" to help men learn to respect women. And if he's the best there is there is really no hope for women to ever be equal. Are there any Kenyans who could address this? I just can't beleive in my heart that any woman wants to be beat. I am so tormented by this and just looking for some feedback.

I should have included I met other men from other parts of Africa who genuinely hold the same values such as equality and human rights as integral to their continents growth. And to keep saying its "cultural" is BS! Slavery in the states was "cultural" to the south. This is a HUMAN RIGHTS issue! As for South Africabeing the best, they are the most backward when it comes to HIV?AIDS treatment. Did you know that the official "treatment" there is garlic and lemons. If know if I was diagnosed I wouldn't be taking their medical advice.

I have already lodged a complaint a few days ago.

Answer 1

Savages still to this day life is cheap in Africa.

Answer 2

Well, to say the culture is vastly different is an understatement. The reason why you saw this man at a conference on HIV is because a good percentage of Kenyans and Africans believe that "good women" should not enjoy sex. Therefore, the woman is not usually made love to, but more like raped by her husband. This causes tearing inside the walls of the vagina. For a man to have sex with a willing partner he must go outside the marriage to a prostitute. This is why the rate of people who are heterosexual with HIV/AIDS is higher than in the rest of the world. There's nothing you can do, really, and I know that it's sad. Only the people in a culture can change that culture. The best thing you can do is give money and other aid to organizations that provide education to Kenya and Africa. I grieve with you for all the women who have such brutal lives.

Answer 3

Sorry, I'm not a Kenyan... but yes, I do believe there are women out there that like to get beaten. I don't think the "pirate_wench" is lying. But usually the reason they like to get beat is because they have been emotionally abused to the point that their self-esteem is gone. If or when they manage to get out of such a situation and learn to respect themselves, they are no longer interested in being beaten. If you read more about the "pirate girl" here you will find that she doesn't seem to be happy with her body the way she is and has a lot of stress in her life. When people are put in bad situations they can get very messed up mentally. Women who are in an abusive relationship will keep coming back for more because their whole life has become focused on the abuser. There are plenty of abused women even in countries like the US that get beaten and yet go back for more. Do some reading about spouse abuse and you will start to understand the awful cycle.

Answer 4

As an employer I supervise a lot of African immigrants mainly from Gambia and Kenya. I would have to say my experience with Kenyan women is that they are very strong and proud and would not put up with a beating from anybody! The Kenyans I know would never say such a thing.

I am confused why this man would say this. Clearly, his public persona does not match his personal value system. How does one on one hand promote equality and then on the other hand condone degrading and hurting the persons that they are supposedly trying to make equal?

I would inform the promoters of the conference of his statements.

Answer 5

I am not a Kenyan woman but I do not see how any human can enjoy a beating. I think this is barbaric and should be stopped. I know that there are countries that certain rituals and traditions we of the western world would not understand but there comes a point between traditions and physical abuse. There are many injustice against women all over the world this is just one. Here are a few web sites you may be interested in looking at.



http://www.polygamyinfo.com/intnalmedia%20plyg%2024%20cnn.htm

http://www.amnestyusa.org/women/interact/rapeinkenya.html

Answer 6

It is a fact that some women have a real need to be beaten, I only know about this in a general sense and not relating to the African culture. In a general sense there are many women who have been emotionally damaged as little girls, either physically or sexually assaulted for example. Many of these little girls grow up to be women who are man haters. They have the following tendencies. They are good actresses who can come across as normal and well balanced. During times of stress they have a real need to psychologically go back to the security of their childhood by recreating the stress of that childhood. Many of these unfortunate women will provoke a man in the most evil ways imaginable and they will absolutely not stop ever until that man snaps and hits her, they know exactly what buttons to push and they push them over and over again and get a real kick out of doing it. They have a real need to control. They are, through no fault of their own positively evil and determined to destroy their own lives and the lives of anyone who gets close to them. They often abuse their own children emotionally and use their own children as pawns in their mind games. When they finally succeed in provoking a man who is ordinarily non violent into uncharacteristic violence they then turn into crying manipulating little bitches who say woe is me, he hit me and then the rest of society turns on the innocent male victim and helps the so called female victim. Society (including professionals like police, magistrates etc) help the woman who causes all the pain and heartbreak and effectually assists such evil women in further abusing her spouse and children.

UNDERSTAND THIS BECAUSE IT IS OF VITAL IMPORTANCE, when a woman comes to you crying that her man has hit her and you take her side and help her, she might just be one of the types of women I have described. When you help her or sympathise with her you are condoning, encouraging and helping to cause yet more child abuse.

Answer 7

It's possible that his comment could stem from cultural differences and not as a general rule regarding all women. It's difficult to know for sure without confronting him. Trust me, I'm not condoning the comment, but there are societies that are still in the stone ages where equality of the sexes is concerned and the likelihood of that changing is near to nonexistent.

I'm sorry.

Answer 8

i come across desire and inner peace interior the certainty that there is not any loopy vengeful god who is going to ever punish myself or any of the persons i admire or look after basically using fact we are too sensible to purchase right into a lie that preys on the vulnerable and cowardly sheeple of this international. i will't even fathom eternity no longer to show have a choose to adventure it, regardless of what it would entail. i became no longer alive for an eternity and that i do no longer challenge approximately repeating the non-adventure. This existence is infinitely short in staying power in assessment to the great photograph. it particularly is somewhat an adventure. some astonishing and a few detrimental. it somewhat is genuine, and yet incomprehensible. faith and god trivialize the adventure in my opinion. i will't understand the way every physique in this present day of age are nonetheless so superstitious. that they had an excuse hundreds of years in the past, yet, with all the scientific information available in the present day there is not any excuse. faith breeds immorality. the suitable human beings from a ethical and ethical attitude are the Atheists and the Agnostics in my opinion.

Answer 9

the mind boggles . it just goes to show you what you see in public can be oh so different behind closed doors, we lucky that we can bring home some flowers to a woman we care for. but t seems from what you say if i was a Kenyan i would bring home flowers and then proceed to beet someone with them.Surly this is not the opinion of all men from there. Sounds as you say sick

Answer 10

I believe the Kenyan man made an honest statement.
Perhaps your anguish is based on you only hearing what you want to hear or agree with.
Compared to some of the things American women prefer, like trying to belittle a man or henpecking him to death, so maybe what the Kenyan women prefer is their business and none of yours. Bottom line, it should be a matter of preference and who put you in charge of deciding what women should or should not want?
If it doesn't float your boat, don't get into boating.

Maybe Kenyan women just can't believe that some American women want to wear the pants in a relationship.

Try extracting your nose from where it does not belong, and I have a feeling your torment will go away.

Darryl S.

Answer 11

I wouldn't take anything a Kenyan or most other black people said as education. All African countries, except for South Africa are a wreck and they haven't produced anything to make the world a better place, well, ever! At least Muslims were developing and contributing to the sciences 1500 years ago.