My boyfriend's brother and his girlfriend and children live with us in a 5 bedroom house...?

Question

...although we have enough space for everyone there is not enough space to walk through the living room because my boyfriend's brother and his girlfriend and childrens stuff are laid out everywhere in the living room to the bedroom to the bathroom. I am soo put up with them not picking up after themselves. They leave dishes on the dining table or in the sink until the food left on them become rotten or until they feel like washing them. I am a very clean and organized person and I don't like how they just ignore the fact that they leave their stuff everwhere. I don't want to say anything because for one, the house belongs to my boyfriend's dad, and if I do say something it's just going to create problems between my boyfriend and his brother because he is so over protective of his girlfriend since she's left him before for her ex while she was pregnant for his kid . I need help as to how I can let them know to pick up after themselves and not create any problems?...any suggestions?

...by the way there's 3 children in the home including their 2 freaking dogs...I have 1 child and they have 2 children.

Answer 1

Well communication is the key tell them u want a "family meeting", talk about what is on your mind. tell them you don't mind them staying there, but it would really help you out if they would clean up after themselves. If you keep it inside you will blow up, and stress out more than you are now. Talking about it may help, don't worry about the outcome. That is your house as well and they need to respect that.

Answer 2

Girl, that is tough. This person has equal rights to the house as does your boyfriend. You didn't mention how old the children are or how many they are. I'd talk to all of them in a polite manner after fixing a nice dinner for all. I'd start by letting them know how I feel about the disarray in the house and explain that we can take turns cleaning, cooking etc and that it would be nice for everyone to clean after themselves. Disorganization creates mess and tension and the old man would not appreciate anyone trashing his house. If this doesn't work, ask your boyfriend to handle it or seek help from his dad. Otherwise..... you and your boyfriend can move to an apartment.

Answer 3

If at this grown age she is still a slob I doubt there is anything you can do to change it. She is also raising her kids to be the same. So either you put up with it and try not to get an ulcer over it or you and your boyfriend find somewhere else to roost. My own sister is the same way. She stayed with us a while and I almost went crazy at her messiness. She kept apologizing and saying she would stop but she never did. She just didn't see the mess like I did. m

Answer 4

Just tell them to clean up...be agressive...dont be their maid, let them be responsible in their own chores...remove any beer in the house, for the sake of the children...

your boyfriend can clean the living room, his brother can wash dishes (it's only plates? why dont they want to...they're lazy)...his girlfriend can play with the kids while you can fix the table and food...these things can be done for 5 - 10 minutes, tell them it wont take eternity...what do they have to lose? if they answer time, tell them they're ignorant

if your boyfriend gets mad for you arguing with his bro...your bf is too protective to his grown-up brother, he should back you up for the simple things like that...

Answer 5

Although the house belongs to your boyfriend's family, you still have a right to say something. You live there, too. There is a way to express your feelings about the situation without causing frictin between your boyfriend and his brother. Wow! You have my sympathy. Good luck!

Answer 6

Tell your boyfriend first .Than the two of you sit w/them and tel them , because of the amount of people here , organization needs to be addressed.Suggest writing a chore list , sometimes w/ people like that , doing everything is too overwhelming .Seeing thier jobs on paper is a lot more simple.
Good luck!

Answer 7

I think you should just approach them and let them know that you feel that they can help more with keeping the house clean and a bit more organized. Just come to them very sincrere, honest, and direct but try not to be brash. Let them know how you feel (in a nice way) and hope for the best!!!!

Answer 8

What does his g/f leaving him while she was pregnant, who the house belongs to, etc have to do with people picking up after themeselves?

When people live in a shared situation, it must be kept tidy so as to be fair to everyone.

If they want to live like pigs, they can go live someplace on their own so it doesn't infringe on anyone elses life.

You need some house rules and that's that.

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I couldn't reply to your e-mail because you didn't confirm your e-mail address yet.

Her threats to him about their relationship have nothing to do with being respectful of a shared living space.

Their personal problems do not excuse either of them from their responsibilities, and if you act like it does ... then you are allowing the situation to continue.

Answer 9

Either you talk to them personally and tell them that you have rules in your house that they need to follow and respect or they can find somewhere else to stay at. You were nice enough to let them stay with you, so they should respect you. Even if thye are your boyfriend brother and bla. Tell them its your way or the highway.

Answer 10

I would deffinatly talk to your boyfriend about this if you havent already, its his brother and it would be better recieved if your boyfriend talked to them. Just let him know that its starting to bother you and if you are all going to live together there has to be some kind of compromise of some sort. I hope everything works out for you good luck.