A friend of mine is having some issues with her boyfriend. He works-she doesn't. Because of this, she waits on him hand and foot to try and make it "easier" on him. They also have 2 small children. He doesn't have to do ANYTHING around the house. They have lawn service and she does everything else without having to be asked. His clothes are sorted and hung for work, his dinner is ready every night when he gets home, she even has him a drink made when he walks through the door. He doesn't even have to take the trash out-she does it. He's never gotten up with the baby at night (says he'll be tired at work), doesn't help her do a single thing when he gets home and doesn't spend any time with the kids while he's there. Their anniversary was 2 months ago but he didn't get her anything or take her out. (said he'd make it up to her). Then he goes everywhere and anywhere and she never says anything. She NEVER gets a break and is feeling a wee bit underappreciated: is she right?
2006-08-25 05:30:12 · 6 answers · asked by southrngirl2724 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
She never says anything to him about going out but HAS tried to sit down and talk to him about her feelings many times. She says he always responds one of three ways:
1. He says he'll try to do better. (which she said lasts about 2 weeks)
2. He tunes her out and keeps having her repeat the questions.
3. He says, "What do you want me to do? I just don't know what to say."
I can attest to the fact that she's definantly not a ****** about what he's doing but she has been so upset because she doesn't know any other way to get through to him.
2006-08-25 05:42:58 · update #1
I can't say I've ever heard her complain about it...she's always saying she does it because she feels like that's her contribution to the partnership. She likes doing these things for him but it's upsetting that he seems to take them for granted and just expect that they're done. I'm just at a loss as to what to tell her...
2006-08-25 05:46:13 · update #2
Yes she is. She sounds amazing. I don't think I could ever do that and then not even so much as get taken out on my anniversary. He's lucky and maybe she should talk to him about it to see if he actually knows and realises how much she does for him.
2006-08-25 05:35:53 · answer #1 · answered by ѕомєопєѕ▪ ваву ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that she never says anything is the problem. Communication is the key. How people split the responsibilities of life as a couple needs to be agreed on by both, as each shows value for what the other does. The fact that she does not feel appreciated has to be discussed. It's one of the most important parts of any relationship, appreciation and respect.
2006-08-25 12:38:35 · answer #2 · answered by btdt65 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may be right in feeling under appreciated BUT why is she doing all this then? Sometimes you get what you ask for and sounds to me like she is accepting it all. Still no excuse for him not making it up to her. Does she need a break? Sounds like she likes to do it. Or is she the type to do it all and then complain she is doing it all but not say a word? Its a 2 way street and she is on a different block
2006-08-25 12:39:16 · answer #3 · answered by JoeP 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes. her job is more important in the grand scheme of things than his. he should count his blessings. though she may not contribute monetarily to the household, without her, there would be no household. how can he not have anything to do with his kids? what an idiot!
2006-08-25 12:39:43 · answer #4 · answered by Robert A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
heck yea..... my mom was that way with my dad and now they have a divorce....He is still complaining about it but that is what he gets
2006-08-25 12:36:11 · answer #5 · answered by am m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a bit underappreciated?!!
she's his slave!
tell her get out now while she can.
2006-08-25 12:36:40 · answer #6 · answered by tlindamt 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋