hug no thanks!!?

Question

is their anyone else who feels uncomfortable with hugging?? i love hugging my kids and my hubby but i feel so uncomfortable hugging friends, family member like sisters or borthers even my own mother. once my mom hugged me and i didnt like it!! what is wrong with me??

Answer 1

maybe someone (perhaps a relative) abused you once or touched you in a way that made you uncorfortable and this is why it makes you feel weird when you hug friends or family.
You may need some counseling.

Answer 2

Your just not a very affectionate person to anyone other then your hubby or kids, there is nothing wrong with you because of it. You may not have gotten alot of affection from your family growing up and just feel that now it is too little to late, you don't want it. And as far as your friends go and hugging them, I don't either, I don't feel its apropriate. I do have a friend that lives states away, if I see her then yes, a hug is good, I never see her and I am thankful she is alive and I can see her and talk with her.......... but if I see them all the time or even once in awhile..... more often then I do my friend that is far away....... no a hug is not nesassary, not in my book anyway. Don't worry about it and just be you.blessed be.

Answer 3

Oh my Gosh! Thank you so much for posting this question. I've always felt uncomfortable hugging people that 1. Aren't my children or 2. I don't want an intimate relationship with. All this time I thought I was weird. I mean I can shake hands but hugging is more like . . awkward. Especially the hug with the kiss on the cheek. Yuck.

Answer 4

Ha ha. Well, don't worry, you're not at all alone in this.

I hate hugging with a passion. I like wathcing those emotional movies where everyone hugs and kisses, I like seeing people hug, but I hate being hugged. I'm just uncomfortable with it emotionally. And because of it a lot of people think I'm cold and repulsive. But it's not true, I just can't help it.
I just feel uncomfortable with this physical closeness, even if I happen to be emotionally close with them.

Answer 5

I used to be that way. I was raised with a mother who didn't show me love by physical contact. I had to learn how to accept it and how to enjoy it. I didn't feel worthy of anyones love. I also felt that they were in my space. A control issue on my part. I didn't want to get close to anyone. Yeah hugging on your husband will feel fine because you choose him and you know he loves you and you love him. Hugging your kids...you made them, they are apart of you. I found out that the love that I had deep inside, was easier to show to my kids, they didn't know me(all the fears, flaws ect). My kids loved me for me.

There could be other reasons for it. Maybe something happened when you were young. If that's the case, you need to deal with what happened to you. Get some therapy. Therapy does help if you find the right therapist.

You can also try to remember how you felt when someone hugged you. Write down you feelings. Read what you had written down about a week later. Ask your self...how can it harm me, did it hurt, what did I think would happen, just be honest with yourself. It takes time to heal. I know it did for me. Good luck.

Answer 6

You have issues with intimacy outside your comfort zone.
There's really nothing "wrong" with that unless you feel there is. Then you need to find out what in your past makes you this way. Did someone "hug" you inappropriately in your childhood? Someone you related to family? Consider counseling. This maybe holding you back from many other things in life as well.

Answer 7

i give hugs to people i haven't seen for a long time, and only if they smell good! lol! i too hate hugging anyone but my kids on a regular basis. although, get a little tipsy, and hugs are a little more tolerable, but once again, only if they smell good! lol! i hate people that think they know you that are touchy feely also, if you don't know me, don't touch me! talk about invading my personal space! i'm with you on that, but what do you think of people that still kiss their family on the lips, no thank you, weirdos. my grandpa used to let us kiss him on the cheek when i was a kid and now know why. you don't know where or what's in peoples mouths, it's gross.

Answer 8

You do have some issues. But unfortunately, you are not alone. Most of the time people here, in the US tend to be just like you. I am originally from Europe and people there are so much warmer and open.

Answer 9

I have that problem, too, mostly with friends. They hug just to say Hello and I get all weirded out. It just makes me feel vulnerable I think.

Answer 10

i think everybody has their own comfort zone when it comes to letting others into their physical space. there is no reason to hug anyone you dont want to. you might think a bit about it though, most people only feel totally comfortable hugging people they really trust.