2006-08-25 03:02:24 · 10 answers · asked by eejese3615 2 in Sports ➔ Baseball
This is kind of random for the baseball section, but since everyone else's jokes are off topic, hope you don't mind something political!
One day, President Bush was having tea with the Queen. "How," he asked her, "do you keep your governement running so smoothly?"
"Oh, that's easy," she replied, calling Tony Blair into the room. "I just make sure that the people I surround myself with are intelligent to answer simple riddles. Watch and learn." Turning to Mr. Blair, the Queen asked, "If your Father and your Mother had a child, and it's not your brother or your sister, who is it?"
"Why, it's me, of course," Tony Blair said proudly.
"Very good," said the Queen, and turning back to President Bush, said, "and that's how I know my advisors can make logical decisions."
When he got back to the states, the first thing Dubya did was call Dick Cheney into his office. "I want you to answer this for me," W told Cheney, who nodded enthusiastically. "If your mother and your father had a child, and it's not your brother or your sister, who is it?"
Cheney, looking confused, asked the President if he could get back to him after doing some research. George consented, so Dick Cheney went around asking all the Republican senators and staff members he could find if they could answer the riddle, but none of them could. Finally, good ol' Dick ended up in the bathroom, where he recognized John Kerry's shoes under the stall. "John," called Dick, "Could you answer a riddle for me." Kerry agreed, and after hearing the riddle, responded, "Why, it's me, of course."
After thanking Mr. Kerry profusely, Mr. Cheney hurried back to Mr. Bush's office, where he told the President that he had figured out the answer to the riddle. "If my mother and my father had a child and it wasn't my brother or my sister," he began,looking very proud of himself, "it would be John Kerry!"
The President began to turn red. "No, you idiot," he yelled at his VP, "it would be Tony Blair!"
2006-08-25 07:24:40 · answer #1 · answered by Laura 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Beware of assistance at Cosco!
A guy came out of a Cosco store when he was greeted by two teenage girls. They told him they are trying to raise money for a charitable event and they would help carry his packages. When the got to his car they said they would clean the windows, at that point they were both cleaning the glass and there shirts were lifting up and they were pressing there breast against the windows as they reached to clean the glass.
They then asked if he could give them a ride to another store. As he drove them they removed their clothes and started having sex with each other. After a few minutes one of the girls jumped into the front seat and started preforming oral sex on him, at the same time the 2nd girl stole his wallet. He had his wallet stolen on Thursday, Friday, Twice on Saturday and will probable have it stolen again on Monday.
2006-08-25 06:42:11 · answer #2 · answered by Ask the Chef 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a million. 2 cows status in a paddock, one cow says ''moooo...'' the different cow says, ''damn it, i became into gonna say that!'' 2. 2 vomits are walking down the line, one stops with the help of a tree and starts crying, the different one comes upto him and asks whats incorrect. He replies ''that's the place i became into reported! *sniff*'' 3. What do you call Batman and Robin as quickly as they have been run over with the help of a steam curler? Flat guy and Ribbin 4. What do you call a deer without eyes? No concept. What do you call a deer without eyes and no legs? nevertheless no concept. What do you call a deer without eyes, no legs and no genitals? nevertheless no f*cking concept! i've got have been given lots extra.. lol
2016-12-17 16:59:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. What do you call 2 guys with no arms and legs hanging out by the window sill? Curt and Rod
2. Why did the blonde buy a sheet of sandpaper? She thought it was a map of the desert.
2006-08-25 04:20:37 · answer #4 · answered by Chopper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A blonde was shopping at a Target Store and came across a silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was.
The clerk said, "That's a thermos . . . it keeps some things hot and some things cold."
"Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing. I'm going to buy it!" So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day.
Her boss saw it on her desk. "What do you have there?" he asked.
"Why, that's a thermos . . . it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied.
Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it?"
The blond replied, "Two Popsicles, and some coffee."
2006-08-25 03:05:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
a smart blonde santa clause and a pregnant lady are in an elevator and a dollar drops on the ground wich one picks it up first?
the pregnant lady because the other two don't exsist
2006-08-25 07:04:13 · answer #6 · answered by lukemiester 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So these two guys walked into a bar and had quite a few drinks when the first guy decides he needs to tell the second one something. He turns to him and tells him that he slept with the other guys mother. Confused, guy number 2 says "what?" Everybody around them gets quite to see what happens as the first guy repeates himself... "I slept with your mother." The second guy takes the drink out of the first guys hand and says "Dad, you're drunk."
2006-08-25 03:06:54 · answer #7 · answered by bugzaper 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What do you call a blonde skeleton found in the closet?
The winner of last year's hide and seek contest.
2006-08-25 03:07:41 · answer #8 · answered by livesmart247 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does Michael Jackson like 28 years olds????
Becuz there are Twenty 8 year olds!!!!!
2006-08-25 04:07:15 · answer #9 · answered by Mr. Stuart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend's mom was so hairy, he said he got rug burn when she gave birth to him.
2006-08-25 13:22:47 · answer #10 · answered by djsyankees 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋