How do you get over the hurt of finding out your boyfriend also the dad of your 2 kids has another child.?

Question

My boyfriend and i have been together for 4 yrs with 2 kids, this yr after having our 2nd child i was told about his first child she is 2 and so is my son. They both say is happened in the first part of our relationship. I love that child like i love my 2. How do i get over the fact that she ws kept from me by everybody even his mom. (her and my son are 9 months apart)

Answer 1

You love the child so whats to get over with? The question is how do you forgive your boyfriend for this ultimate betrayal. If you keep your boyfriend you MUST get over it; if you can not get over it, you MUST get rid of your boyfriend. G'luck!

Answer 2

Maybe you should take the focus off yourself and think about the reasons why your boyfriend didnt tell you about his daughter? He obviously was sleeping with 2 women at once, you being one of them. He obviously loves you because he had another child with you. The fact that he kept it from you shows to me he didnt want to risk losing you. This other woman I think has used great self control herself for not telling you too. She cared enough about him and you to keep this thing secret. Your man wants to be with you or he wouldnt have had another child with you. He would have gone with the mother of his other child if thats who he wanted to be with. There are reasons for everything, you just have to take time out to try and understand the other persons point of view. It may be totally wrong why it was kept a secret from you, but a person wont do something for no reason....He would have had good reasons in his own head why he didnt tell you. .You just need to calm down, clear your head and start looking at this from his perspective......If of course, you still want to stay with him....or is his betrayal too much?

Answer 3

If you are going to stay with him then it will just take time to get over this hurt. I know my answer sucks but its true. You're going to have to try to trust him and just keep on loving all those kids if you want to make it work.