Why should I come to your festival?

Question

Now we're drawing to the end of the festival season, imagine you have the opportunity to put together the last festival of the year.
Which bands would you put on?
What oher entertainment, stalls, food would you have there?
The person who creates the festival I really want to go to wins.

Answer 1

the My Fantastical Chaos Fest

four stages in the corners of a humongous field

a wrestling ring with exclusively midget wrestling in the middle of the field

on the four sides of the fields, bridging the stages:

north: a skatepark with hourly exhibitions and competitions
south: a tournment grade paintball course with tournaments and audience participation
east: the Big Brother house
west: acres upon acres of puppies and kittens ala the Puppy bowl

bands/acts:
reunions:
White Zombie
Smashing Pumpkins
Talking Heads
Wu Tang Clan
Run DMC with guest DJs Danger Mouse/ Beastie Boys DJ (dont remember his name, sorry) and Spindarella
Janes Addiction
Rage Against the Machine
Soundgarden
Hole
Stone Temple Pilots

other acts
Harry Connick Jr. (doing his funk act from She and Star Turtle)
System of a Down
Clutch
Reverand Horton Heat
Mojo Nixon
Red Peters
Lounge Against the Machine
weird Al Yankovic
Buckethead
Primus
Metallica
Anthrax
Harry Belefonte
Dido
Roger Waters

other attractions:
Fortune Tellers, Tattoo stands, do-it-yourself voodoo emporiums
voter registration (tried, but true)
Bob Barker performing free spaying and neutering
A live taping of Lingo for Game Show Network
Free cotton candy in various rain forest friendly flavors
A water slide
A snow machine and sledding hill.
a genuine beer tent from Munich with Umpa Band

and the parading around of Gene Simmons in a cage where you can poke sticks at him

Answer 2

Well, its going to have to include all the bands that I haven't yet managed to see recently. Including DPT, Babyshambles (And lets throw in a libertines reunion for good measure) Arctics, The Killers, Howling Bells, Guillemots etc. But of course a few of the class acts that I want to see again - We Are Scientists, Razorlight, The Charlatans, The Grates, The Rifles, Kasbian etc. Lets just say the best mix of bands from all the festivals that we've had so far (including the greatest hits set of Radiohead, but none of the trippy sh!t that was included.) I will make sure the likes of girls aloud will not play, but will have a separate "tent" where the aim is to throw things at them while they stand there in silence.

Food? The stuff normally at festivals (The burgers, pies, Mexican, Chinese, etc) but at half the cost. Something about spending a fiver on a burger makes it taste rubbish. Stalls and entertainment? Lets have proper alton tower rides in, not the rubbish fair ground rides. And again HALF THE PRICE (Did you know that sling shot ride costs £25???? No chance mate)

Of course we'll have a signing tent, an indie karaoke tent, your funky house tent.

AND i wont have beer tokens. more cig "Stalls" and lots more free booze on standby

One last thing - proper nice clean toilets. No more of this dirty portaloo sh!t.

If only it could happen...sigh.

Answer 3

you should come to my festival as it will be full of new experiences for u and will help you to know somebody else than yourself