I had a girlfriend who was very passive-aggressive. It drove me nuts! Nothing was ever her fault and she lied alot. She bent over backwards for her friends, family, and even strangers, but dragged her feet when it came to me. She had too much pride to apologize for mistakes and uncovered lies and offered gifts instead. She only had complaints about me when I had complaints about her. I would confront her about something that happened, say, yesterday and she would start going off on me about the past two months.
The message I got from that was "I keep my mouth shut when I'm angry and you should do the same, especially if you're angry at me". I always felt, and still do, that if something is REALLY bothering you about someone, you won't wait until the other person gets mad at you first before you say something. I eventually let her go because I felt she lives in a dream world where she always gets her way, she's always right, and she's above reproach. Totally unrealistic.
2006-08-24 21:10:45 · 12 answers · asked by ONYX 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I can't last two minutes with a passive-aggressive person! Something about that whole dynamic provokes me to force them to become either passive or aggressive! It's not pretty! I'll never understand why people can't be open, honest and upfront about things! As long as it isn't about name-calling, blaming, profanities, or physical violence, there is nothing wrong with discussing certain situations in order to clear them up and wipe the slate clean! How do people carry around all that baggage?
Congrats on your new found freedom!
2006-08-24 21:19:48 · answer #1 · answered by *ღ♥۩ THEMIS ۩♥ღ* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a bit confused by your question because you are no longer in the relationship in question.
Having been there before, I can say that walking away is the best thing. There seem to be very few P-A people willing to recognize that there is a problem and who are willing to dedicate themselves to working beyond.
Just pay attention to warning signs the next go-round and good luck to you!
2006-08-24 21:15:47 · answer #2 · answered by purplepinkanddots 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OH LORD my mother is passive agressive, She still drives me nuts. I can't break up with her, but I do set boundries. I will say something and she will cry and say.......no one loves me no one wants to be around me, I am a terrible person Then she expects people to say oh no you are wonderful we love you.
I don't buy into that. I say mom, I love you but you are being passive aggressive and I need to go home now
I used to get major anxiety attacks from my mom. I also being the oldest had to clean up after my mom, emotionally, do chores, take care of the other kids because she was always off on some sort of tangent.
I had to get counseling. I am leaning to not take her so seriously.
She will always be my mom and I can't get rid of her. I have to change how I react to her. I have to never spend too much time with her. And avoid subjects and suddenly run to the bathroom if I want to scream. She has caused me much distress. I grew up thinking I had to please her. I never will, at least now I know that.
So, then I dated a guy who was passive agressive. I gave him three strikes, then broke up with him. He kept calling, I asked - are you seeing a counselor for your divorce issues and he said yes. So, I said write this down and I said PASSIVE AGRESSIVE. And he talked to me for like three hours with me explaining it and he took it seroiusly and talked to his counselor. He begged me to see him ag ain and I said NOPE.
My prime example of my family is a van load of my mom and aunts and uncles. All saying where should we eat, you choose, no you choose........you know me I don't care where we eat. ARound and around it goes. SO I pick a place. And all dinner I hear complaints. my mother says she get gassie here from the meat. They were all mumbling under their breath about the place we were eating at. I just sat back and thanked God that I chose to not continue that in my generation.
I am glad you said you HAD a girlfriend. as in the past. If you married her it would only get worse.
2006-08-24 21:36:15 · answer #3 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wake up in the morning before them..get a knife from the kitchen and head back to the bedroom..sit on top of them with the knife 2 inchs from there throut and wait for them to wake up..when they do the first thing they will see is your face and a bloody great knife against there throut...then say to them..see how bloody easy it could have been NOW GET OFF MY FOOKIN CASE!!!!.. or ya could just leave..up to you..haha
2006-08-25 05:42:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I been there. We had good make up sex , 2 beautiful girls, a nice house and nine yrs of that bullshit. Now my daughters have two houses.
2006-08-24 21:22:29 · answer #5 · answered by dlittlz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, & divorce,
i thought things would change but they never did ,funny thing is i got remarried,she has been married twice more.and my boys told me and my current wife we are not normal for we never fight
2006-08-24 21:15:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! I told him Ok you can abused me sexually from behind, then he was shock and now he respect me!
2006-08-24 21:12:44 · answer #7 · answered by Bruno 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No experience
2006-08-24 21:13:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why r u asking that
2006-08-24 21:20:15 · answer #9 · answered by Savannah R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so find someone new
2006-08-24 21:15:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋