Has this ever happened to you? If so describe the incident.?

Question

Have you asked a question, and people answered a different question. It happened to me. Have people forgotten how to read! I was chastised for something I did not even write!
My post was “Is NOT disciplining children just as harmful as abusing them.”
I was overwhelmed with responses of “discipline is not abuse!” When did I say it was?

Discipline-training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.

I do not think it was vague, it was one line. here it is "“Is NOT disciplining children just as harmful as abusing them.”

I'm an English tutor. My job is to study the English language; I do this daily. I know my question was not vague or incorrect.

Answer 1

Yes, it's happened. I find most of the time some people misinterpret an opinion based question and assume what your opinion is. I asked if the teacher is at fault if they carry on a relationship with a student. One answerer told me I was an idiot for saying that the student was at fault. I never said the student was at fault, I just asked what other people thought about those situations.

I personally don't find the phrasing of the question confusing. You never said discipline was the same as abuse, you said that NOT disciplining is at about the same level as abuse. People just need to realize there's a difference between disciplining and not disciplining.

Answer 2

I read the question you are reffering to....the question is good one...but on this site I can understand people might misread it because people here are used to bad grammer and spelling and run on stentences and assume that the question no matter how eloquently asked is stupid.

That was my interpretation of how 'many of the questions asked here' get responded to....thank you....thank you very much.

Your question was clear.

Is it as abusive to 'not discipline a child' as it is to 'abuse a child'.

I don't have children. Though, I do have a childhood.
I have cats.... a kitten and a full grown Tom cat. The kitten is sprightly and curious, as children are. The Tom cat is gentle, reserved and unforgiving, as parents are. Every once in a while the Tom cat smacks the kitten....not out of malice or jealousy...just to let the kitten know that the claws were too sharp that time...the bite in your playfulness was too deep.

One cat is gently disciplining the other...to let it know that there are boundaries that are safe to cross and boundaries that are not safe to cross.

It does as much damage 'to discipline' as 'not to discipline',...abuse is in a seperate category.

At least with discipline, the young one can be better prepared to face and respond to abuse.

When I was six years old, I remember, my father standing in front of me with a pair of scissors,....telling me that if my tongue was black from telling a lie, he would cut it out. Although, I knew I hadn't told a lie,... I couldn't see my own tongue....so I didn't know if it was black....and therefore I couldn't show it to him....to him, by not showing the tongue.... it meant I told a lie. To me, it meant I can't speak again.
There is a fine line between discipline and abuse. I've never told a lie that I couldn't get away with since that day. In some people's eyes that makes me intelligent.

And so it's happened to you again....the original question is left unanswered. Nobody here knows answers....we never did.

All the best to you and yours.

Answer 3

People do seem to do that on this site quite a bit. I read your original question but didn't answer it. I think your question being without a clear definition of what you consider discipline or abuse to be started people thinking about the stormy issue of where the line from discipline ends to where abuse begins as it varies from person to person. So, being like most people, they went with what was on their mind and instead of actually answering you, used it as a forum to spout their own opinion in that regard.

Answer 4

I believe you are correct in both instances. People do like to answer questions that you do not ask and yes it is just as harmful to not discipline children as it is to abuse them. It is a form of abuse in itself which normally cause them to lead a dysfunctional life.

Answer 5

You know it definitely is. You see these children that are not disciplined like in the stores. Whenever their mom tells them no, they throw a temper tantrum. Then above all they get away with it because their mom gets so embarrassed and buys them whatever they want, and what do children learn from this? they learn if I scream, kick, and cry then I will get anything I want.

Answer 6

well, to answer your original question, neglect can be punishable by law just as abuse is, but neglect and abuse, of course, are different that spoiling and disciplining a child. I don't think leniency is as harmful as abuse.
and to answer this question: I think everyone is misunderstood occasionally, good for you for trying to clarify.

Answer 7

blame a parsing error. You asked " Is (not disciplining)" and they answered "Is NOT (disciplinging)" ... as in "ask not what Rome can do for you, but what you can do for Rome" means "don't ask." So be at ease, the only blame is on the English language for allowing such ambiquos statements to exist while they can simultaneously appear gramatically correct.

Answer 8

People read the header, but not the post-text. When you type the header, make a partial statement so that they have to read the rest of what you wrote. Also, try to keep it short, A.D.D. and the need to respond first means people will not read two full paragraphs!

Answer 9

No, it hasn't happened to me because I phrase my questions correctly. You're saying that disciplining kids means abusing them, which is not true. That's why you got chewed up.

Answer 10

Yes, I am assuming most people on here can barely read because I have the exact same problem. Then they think they are sooo smart for making you look like an idiot when really it is the other way around.