I was trying to be understanding of his emotional state, but I'm concentrating on me! We were supposed to talk, I was patient with him getting the nerve up to have a discussion. A week ago he left a message "checking in to see what was going on" with no mention of the talk. I have not returned his call, and will not! Am I wrong?
2006-08-24 16:24:09 · 21 answers · asked by nychichi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if he just got over a divorce than of coarse he is not going to be ready to commit into another serious relationship he still feeling the pain from the last one.....if you like him give him some time...just keep hanging out and spending time together....but take it easy...if he got burnt in his last relationship it will be a while before he can trust someone again. the fact that he was seeing you is a good sign though... dont rush it ...unless you just cant wait .....in that case.....move on
2006-08-24 16:31:00 · answer #1 · answered by puertoricout 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When someone says they're not ready for a serious relationship, believe them. That is such a common mistake we women make, we try to change their minds, and make the situation work to our advantage. Good for you, I'm glad you made the decision to move on. Find someone who is open to a relationship like you are. Timing is everything when it comes to being involved in any relationship. Both parties have to be willing and ready to commit.Don't ignore him though, take the high road and simply tell him, that you are ready for something that he isn't at this time. Why ignore him? Just because he doesn't want a relationship with you doesn't mean you have to make this breakup ugly, who knows maybe you'll meet up again in the future...
2006-08-24 16:43:01 · answer #2 · answered by Cynthia 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People who have recently divorced are going through an emotional renewal of their lives (depending on how long the marriage lasted, and if there are children involved).
I'd advise you to take it slow and easy with him if you are still interested in pursuing a relationship with him. If a relationship is to work, there should be no pride in calling to fix whatever is wrong.
But do remember the statistics -90% of second marriages fail.
Girl, there are plenty of single men out there with no emotional baggage - why not immerse yourself in that pool? Best of luck!
2006-08-24 16:35:38 · answer #3 · answered by doggoneit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok,
He just is getting over being divorced?
Why would you want to have a relationship with some one that is not all there and ready emotionally and spiritually ready to commit to you?
You need to reevaluate what you want in life and you time table for getting it.
Just because he was married once does not make him a sure bet.
Think about this he is divorced that means the whole committed relationship deal did not work one time for him already.
What makes you so special that you think it will work between you and him now?
2006-08-24 16:30:20 · answer #4 · answered by Ryce Queen 13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Recently divorced men are usually only interested in one thing: Sex, sex, and more sex. So of course he's not interested in a serious relationship. This is one reason why I steer clear of recently divorced men. In my humble opinion the tack your "boyrfriend" is taking is avoiding any discussion with you about the relationship. Which is why you haven't heard from him.
Find yourself a nice man who's either single or who's been divorced for awhile. No, I don't think your wrong for not calling him. If he really wanted to talk to you, he would call. Good luck.
2006-08-24 16:54:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is a very tramatic experience and he needs time to heal. The best thing you could have done is just be available to listen. You give me the impression that you are hoping for a serious relationship (you can do this verbally or nonverbally) Call him back if you care for him but let him control where he wants the relationship to go for now.
2006-08-24 16:33:20 · answer #6 · answered by STEVE P 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't wrong but you should give him his "time" to recover from his recent divorce.
He did like you but sometimes it is hard to recover from a divorce that has happened so recently. You cannot be mad at him if his heart hasn't healed all the way from the past. Also, you should talk to him considering he was nice enough to break it off with you instead of staying with you while all he would concentrate on is the recent divorce. Trust me, he did you a favor.
2006-08-24 16:27:50 · answer #7 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him some space and don't feel so needy. Divorce is very emotional both financially and emotionally. Maybe he is having second thoughts about the divorce and his ex. Just wait for him to call you and you date others and go on with your life.
2006-08-24 16:46:54 · answer #8 · answered by c k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wrong? Not necessarily. Self-centered? Yes, but at least you admit it.
Give up on him and go on to someone who's more emotionally available. It will do him good, too, because then you won't be nagging at him. He's already had one bad relationship, he doesn't need another one with someone who will play the "I'm not going to call, I'm going to make him call again" mindgames.
2006-08-24 16:42:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs time...Jumping into a relationship right after ending is not good for you...What i mean is you would basically be a rebound. Just give him sometime....
2006-08-24 16:28:35 · answer #10 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋