Question for mom's who have nursed for a year or more (or plan to)?

Question

My daughter is 7 months old. I have nursed her since birth & she has never taken a bottle (she wouldnt even take one of breastmilk!) As a result, I've had to be with my her all the time (never leave her for more than a couple of hours) She also nurses to sleep, so no one can get her to bed or down for a nap, but me. I am in school & I also work part time (believe it or not) despite having to always be home to nurse. Sometimes I really love the fact that I am nursing & am DEFINITELY committed to nursing her for a year or more. But, sometimes I just feel tired of it-wishing that I could leave her more and could get more of a break. I feel jealous of bottle feeding moms, that they can just leave their babies with friends, their hubby, or at daycare all day with NO problems. I just feel like nursing has been SO challenging-i continue to nurse because i know how good it is for my baby and because now she is very attached to it. Wondering if any moms have struggled with similar feelings?

Answer 1

I have a 41 month old and an 18 month old. I breastfed both of them 14 and 15 months. I know how you feel. I was there 24/7 doing all the work and yes it does become overwhelming. You almost totally give up your own life, needs and desires just to provide the absolute best thing for your childern. I have absolutely no regrets. These feeling will dissapear in the future and you'll always know that you ae totally commited to your kids.
There are other ways that you can seek help, teach her how to drink from a sippy cup(a no valve one to start) that way someone else could feed her one feeding, if she refuses, she'll nurse better next time. Also, the other partner could give the bath so you don't feel as though you are the only person proving care.
You are doing something wonderful for your child. Remember that!

Answer 2

Oh, that sounds rough.

My breastfed baby won't take a bottle either... unfortunately for me, I *have* to leave her, I have no choice. Rent must be paid, you know? We struggled mightily trying to find some way to get her to take expressed breastmilk, and failed. This is what I learned:

-There are other ways to feed a baby than the bottle! Look around into this; I've included a link that might be helpful. It didn't work for us, but it might for you. You should try it.

-Babies can actually go quite a long time (8-9 hours) without eating, especially if the baby will take any breastmilk *at all* from a bottle, or a little water; hydration is the issue. If you do this, however, be prepared to sleep with your baby and nurse all night long the nights you're away- your baby will need it.

-Papas+slings=awesome. My husband would put my daughter on and take her for walks. Slinging has totally been his thing that he can do for her since he has no boob. I'll include some links so you know what I'm talking about. :)

Congratulations on nursing so long, and being committed to keep nursing! It sounds like you need a break, though- I think you should leave your baby with papa (it's good for babies and papas to get some alone bonding time anyhow) and go do something nice for yourself sans baby. At 7 months your baby is probably fine to go some hours without you, and it'll be good for you to get away for a little while.

Answer 3

I was in the same boat! My 11-mo-old daughter enjoys ice water and diluted juice in a sippy cup now, but I know the feeling of not being able to leave her. She should be able to get to sleep without nursing at 7 months though; maybe you could work on that. Also, if she's taking rice cereal, you can mix breastmilk into that and skip a feeding. That might give you a break during the day for 5-6 hours.

Answer 4

Oh- I feel for you! My daughter is almost 11 months old and I've nursed her exclusively also. She hates bottles, even with breast milk in them, so I've had no other choice but to continue with nursing. First of all I have to say WOW because you work, AND go to school, AND nurse a baby! You're a remarkable woman! I have 2 children and babysit occasionally, but I don't work outside of the home nor do I attend school. I've gone back and forth with my feelings towards breastfeeding. There are times when I just want to cut her off for good now that she can drink out of a cup, but I don't want any more kids so she'll be the last baby I'll ever nurse. So I continue to do it. It's a hard decision, when to stop. I wish you all the best!

Answer 5

I do sympathize, and I think you're amazing for continuing to nurse so long while working and going to school. Great job!

I've been either pregnant or nursing for the past 4 years now, and I do get overwhelmed. However, like another poster said, you're almost to the point of being able to leave some solids for your daughter to eat while you're gone. She'll be able to miss a nursing session now and then in favor of an extra meal/snack of solids and maybe breastmilk in a sippy cup. Breastmilk can also be mixed with baby cereal, or it could be frozen and served as a "slushie" with a spoon. In fact, you could try some of those things now while you're away for a short time.

Oh, and my daughters also nursed to sleep every time, but my mom and husband seemed to have no problem getting them to sleep without me. They just had the touch -- rocking them, walking them, whatever. My mother-in-law, on the other hand, could not get the girls to sleep without my help. ;-) So, if there's someone that you really trust with your daughter, he or she may be able to get them to sleep even without you there.

Good luck! And it's all worth it in the end.

Answer 6

i'm nevertheless nursing my 8 month onld and that i visit proceed for a minimum of yet another 4-8 months. I nevertheless pump two times an afternoon at artwork. i attempt to do it about each 4 hours or so. I nurse at 7, pump at eleven and 230. this form I easily have made more desirable through the time I p.c.. him up in the afternoon. I deliver what I pump to daycare with him. He hasn't ever had formulation. no matter if you ought to apply formulation in the course of the day. Pump a minimum of once at artwork. you'll interrupt your furnish going 9 hours without nursing or pumping.

Answer 7

Dixie Chick-
I have nursed all 3 of mine for 6 months or more! I have learned a few things along the way, and I hope this advice comes to you in a way that will assist you in allowing you to feel "Ok" with leaving the baby.
I first would like to say, that you are doing a great job, and that nursing in the US is SLOWLY becoming the norm. So Kudos to you and the your baby for making such a great effort!
My oldest (now 7yrs old) nursed from me only, until 18 months when I got prenant and dried up! I simply did not offer it to the child, and the child stop asking to my amazement!
My second ( now 5 yrs) started taking a bottle at 11 months at night (from the hubby b/c I was working) but continue to nurse til 14 months.
My last (now 2) was not getting enough by 11 months and started eating chicken Mc Nuggents!
I hope that because of what I had mentioned that you feel that I am able to give advice.
I first would like to see you take baby steps, weeing a baby, and yourself from breastfeeding is hard. I would like to see you start by feeding the baby baby food (even finger food, anything that you can smush between your fingers that is the size of a cheerio, some juice (You may want to try something diffrent then a bottle, bottles are simular to breast, and the baby simply may not want anything else other then breastmilk from something they suckle, try sippy cups and even flexie straws cups.)
So feed the baby first "outside food" then feed the baby from you. It may take a few times to get the baby to take it, but once mine had their first real drink of sweet natural apple juice from a sippy cup - they were hooked!
Also I would try adding either choclate syrup or something simular to milk, First either a bottle or sippy. Try it a few times and see what happens.
After all those attempts, REMEMBER that the baby feels any stress that you have, and that you produce less milk when your are stressed. Leave the baby with the father, give him the tools mentioned above and visit a friend for a while, REMEMBER all babies fuss sometimes, just to hear them selves cry. Besides it's good for Dad to learn His way of soothing baby. My husband can but any fussy baby to sleep within 20 minutes.... He had to pratice and learn his style, but he can do it. It also builds a trust between husband and wife.
My last bit of two cents. STOP offering the breast! This is were I personally struggled. I would offer it for any given reason. Only offer after mealtime (when baby food, juice, and or flavored milk was offered first, at bedtime (If needed) Most babies can sleep through the night at this age, so waking up to eat, is habit really. Ask the Dad to get up and rock the baby, this will give him the feeling he is the hero and that you trust him to put the baby back down. Try your best not to interfer when he's helping (NOT EAST) or do the "lay back down thing" and have Dad go to the crib and lay the baby back down. Crying for 15 minutes never killed a child- HONESTLY you never hear that in the papers!
Everyone resist new things, even babies, but once you've done something new, you may find out it's your favorite. Watch out, your baby will be eating Mc Donald's nuggets, and milk shacks before you know it, and never think twice about your boobs again.
As far as the feelings go, that's normal all moms that only breastfeed feel that way,but when at 7, they cuddle so close to you that they rub their little heads in your chest, you'll be glad you did it, and you'll be happy that you took baby steps to get there!
Please feel free to email me if you have any other question....

Answer 8

I had those feelings with my first child but after I had the other ones I felt proud that my babies grew and thrived just because of me and not some artificial crap. My babies were in my belly for 9 mos and I continued to nourish them in the best way after they were born. Yes it's a sacrifice, I haven't slept more than 2 hours a night since my 9 mo old was born and I have to work full time but just looking at his chunky face and knowing he's healthy because of me and nothing else makes me proud.

I can understand where you're coming from though. Realize that is your child and once you make a decision to have a child you should expect to care for it 24 hrs a day 7 days a week. It's hard to break from that habit if it's your first child but believe me you won't regret it.

Answer 9

It can be challenging at times, especially if she won't take a bottle. Things will get better in the next couple months as she starts to eat solids. You will be able to go out and if she get hungry, your husband or sitter could give her a little rice cereal mixed with breatmilk to tide her over until you get home. This will offer you a little bit of a break. You could also get her started with a sippy cup with breastmilk. I started my son with one at 6 months, however it took him a couple of months to get the hang of it. Once she does though, then you could have more freedom. I would encourage you to try to enjoy this time. It's such a special time, and it goes sooooo fast. God Bless

Answer 10

I feel you! My son was a boob-a-holic, I use to go nuts. When your daughter gets around 1 years old, she wont NEED to nurse so much, and it will be easier. I still nurse my son (now 15 months) but if I need to take a few hours to myself, I get a sitter and he's fine. I started introducing a sippy cup at about 7 months. He liked the toddler cups better then (the one with a straw). It will get easier, believe me! Check out http://www.mothering.com/discussions/ for breastfeeding support