Am I wrong for feeling this way?

Question

I have just found out that I am having a boy...and I know this sounds so cruel, but I was a little disappointed because I wanted to have a girl so bad. DO NOT GET ME WRONG - i will love this baby, and do EVERYTHING that is needed...but is it okay to feel a little disappointed? I feel so wrong...but its not like I want an abortion or something...I still love this baby and am taking care of myself...I dont know how to explain it. See, my boyfriend left me, and I am scared it may be harder for a boy to grow up without a father figure than a girl (since i grew up without one...I just think it wouldnt be as hard...but situations vary, dont get me wrong, I am not naive and that is not the question) I just want to know if its normal to feel disappointed....***PLEASE NO NEGATIVE ANSWERS, I DO NOT NEED RUDE FEEDBACK FROM THOSE WHO JUST WANT TO SAY SOMETHING TO HURT MY FEELINGS OR MAKE ME FEEL WORTHLESS**

Answer 1

no youre not wrong for feeling that way! especially with being in the situation that you are in! just as long as youre not going to harm the baby in anyway (it doesn't sound as though you would though) yes it is harder for a little boy in this day in time to grow up with out a father but you shouldn't make plans for him to grow up with out a father you don't know what the future holds but as long as he is without a father that makes your job that much more important you are mommy and daddy! at least in that situation you know he will be taken care of and noone will ever hurt him because you take full care of him! it will be hard i won't lie to you but you can do it i have total faith and you sound like a loving caring person! just take it day by day! i'll keep you in my prayers!

Answer 2

I think that is normal. Don't worry about it. Even though the father left you I think you can raise the baby boy the way you want him raised and set a good example. There are programs out there like Big Brothers where he could get a positive male role model. Don't feel bad for being disappointed in the sex of the baby. Sure it would be nice to get the sex of the baby you want, but if you really want a girl maybe next time that is what you will get. Congrats on the baby boy you will be a great mother because you are concerned about him already.

Answer 3

It is perfectly normal to feel that way. Soon to be moms usually want a girl (even though they won't admit it) And soon to be dads want a boy. It's harder either way. Because every child needs both parents. there is just so much more both parents can give the child. I am not trying to make you feel bad. It's just a point I'm making. Just because you are a single parent doesn't mean you won't make it though. I can tell you will be a great mother, since you care for it enough to want to keep it from suffering. Just remember now that you are going to be a mother so many things are going to change. Some bad but a lot of good. Keep thinking about that. you will have your own child, your child to raise and you will do just fine. Give the baby a lot of love and don't forget to ask for help when you need it, either from parents or friends or whatever. It's going to be a handful of joy, so congratulations. and good luck.

Answer 4

To answer your other question. If you baby's father wants to be in his child's life, you should definitely allow it. My children are so troubled because their father is off again and on again in their lives. When he comes around, my oldest is happy as can be, but when he stops, she feels worthleess and wonders "why her daddy doesn't love her?"

As long as he is consistent and genuine in his attempt and is not violent or abusive in anyway to you or the child, by all means let him be a part of his son's life.

On this question, you will get over your disappointment. I wanted a boy badly, but the very same day I found out Michael was a girl, I started to fall in love with the idea of pony tails and dresses.

I never got my boy, but darn if she doesn't behave like one. You are feeling lots of things because this is an already emotional time and adding to that is the fact that HE is being such a d**k. It is normal. Follow my previous advice and take charge of your life and happiness.

Answer 5

I really wanted a boy and for some reason I thought for sure I was having a boy and when they did the ultrasound and found out I was having a girl I got to my car and cried. I am so happy now that I have a healthy baby on the way and im happy with having a girl but it took weeks to get over it so I completely know how you feel. Dont feel bad its really common to feel disappointed.

Answer 6

Its ok to feel that way. I understand what your going through. I wanted a boy but i had a girl. She is my angel. Her father isn't really trying to be in her life. As long as you love that child and care for him everything going to be ok. My mom always tell me to not to worry just pray about and everythings going to be ok. Some day you will find someone who wants to love and care for your child.

Answer 7

sweetie its compleatly normal i can see why you would feel like that. My sister had a boy and no dad and she was flipping on how to potty train and stuff..its normal you will figure out whats best for him! god bless!!:)