I had this friend that I wronged. We are both seeing someone but developed feelings for each other. We ended up messing around. Anyway, our bf's didn't know and just thought we were good friends. We talked everyday and were very close. We went out (all of us) to the bar. I knew I shouldn't go because I knew I would get jealous seeing him with his bf who is very controlling of him.
We got separated through the night and then started texting each other. He was asking where I was, and now I was drunk and being a jerk and said if he would break his leash he could come find us (me and my bf). Anyway, the drunker I got, the more pissed at him I got for not talking with me even though we all went out together. So, when me and my bf got ready to leave, I found my friend and told his bf everything and tried starting a fight.
I really screwed up and I sent an apology to him. Is it possible for us to ever be friends again? There is more to the story but this is the gist of it.
2006-08-24 10:07:17 · 17 answers · asked by subnova_98 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I'm not looking for a relationship with him, I just want the friendship. We had both decided that we wanted to stay with our bfs before this all happened.
2006-08-24 10:08:55 · update #1
I should've added that my bf and I have discussed our feelings and the situation. I cannot see this person anymore but I could still chat with him which isn't a big deal since we live over an hour apart.
2006-08-24 14:02:28 · update #2
sounds messy mate
probably best to just move on
2006-08-24 10:09:27 · answer #1 · answered by ☺Everybody still loves Chris!♥▼© 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may not want to hear this; but your best bet is to let him go. What you have created is a ripple effect, in the lives of four people, two who didn't consent. In as much, be very thankful/careful that you don't end up losing your boyfriend over the fiasco. Let the guy have some time. Who knows someday you might have a chance to speak. However; if he's under his man's control, you may have made it worse. His man, more than likely will not let you two talk, let along see each other in person.
2006-08-24 11:30:07 · answer #2 · answered by Swordfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had a similar experience and can add that, depending on how nice your friend is, you are playing with fire. My advice would be to apologize to him IN PERSON; you said you "sent" an apology to him, which implies you emailed or text-messaged it. Talk to him without being too confrontational and see how he reacts. If he accepts your apology and understands your feelings, then you have a good friend on your hands. If he is hostile, then do what you can to put him out of your life. This will sound harsh, but what you did was wrong to him, your boyfriend, and his boyfriend, and if he is angry he has every right to be. If he is not, he is a true friend and perhaps something more. But, as one person has already said, be aware of both your boyfriends' feelings as well. Good luck!
2006-08-24 12:27:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does still exist. But Friends cannot become intiment. Sex complicates and clouds the relationship. There are friends that you can have just for sex. And there are some friends that can seperate the sexual need from the friendship, making it easy to have a special relationship that can be even better. The people are out there. Good Luck
2006-08-24 11:48:31 · answer #4 · answered by Raymond H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once ANY friendship (straight, gay, lesbian, bi, woman/woman, man/man, woman/man) goes into the sexual realm, the friendship is changed forever -- and many think it is destroyed forever. Don't expect your friendship to be the same as it was before. You two might be able to salvage it, but it won't be like before. Whatever the case, don't ever again let anyone else know of your indiscretions -- an act that angered your friend.
2006-08-24 10:14:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At least one relationship is going to go bust in this situation. Either your friendship is sacrificed, or one or both of your relationships with your respective boyfriends. How understanding do you think they are going to be of your continued friendship knowing that you both screwed around on them?
2006-08-24 14:06:42 · answer #6 · answered by Speedo Inspector 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, if you were my friend, I would probably never trust you again. You say that you were drunk, well, what would happen the next time you got drunk and in a bad mood at the same time?
2006-08-24 12:53:03 · answer #7 · answered by chocolatebunny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i should think so if you had a good relationship to start with then it should be a good reason to be friends again!! if you both care about each other then why not!! if he doesnt want to make the first move then you should go for it what can you lose!! good luck!!
2006-08-24 10:11:26 · answer #8 · answered by XXPrincessOfFashionXX 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I beleive frendship is still possible but you have to work for it.You have to do everything possible to say to him that you are sorry and want to fix your relationship. BUt you can't just say sorry with words. Sometimes you have to show some action to have someone know how you feel. I hope this helped. Best wishes.
~Leni ann
2006-08-24 10:13:27 · answer #9 · answered by Leni ann 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's going to be friends with you again, I think it's going to take a long time in coming. That was pretty rough of you guy.
Good Luck.
2006-08-24 10:09:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Of course friendship is still possible. You would just have to contol your jealous streak before it won't be possible at all.
2006-08-24 10:20:55 · answer #11 · answered by Necole 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋