Why is it the first thing women always say about Labor is?

Question

EPIDURAL! OR drugs ?

I mean come on women! Women before us did naturally and many times! yeah yeah Ive heard it all from why not, why should I feel any pain. Pain keeps you alert to what is going on around you , it makes sure you are here in the moment.
The pain is only for a short time. I'm not bashing women who have drugs during birth, im just so curious why women first say that. When I was having my first and the nurse who takes your info on what hostpital and insurance you use was asking epidural? I was like no natural. She was like dumbfounded, I was like do women not do natural anymore, she said hardly. Then when I had both my kids they would ask me if I wanted one, I was like NO stop trying to give me drugs. With my 2nd I was so calm and serene, one nursed asked me about getting epidural and my midwife came in and was like leave her alone, shes more relaxed than we are =).
I asked my ob how many women from their practice do natural, she said 5 percent ( big practice too

LOL I knew the claws would come out, see how women are mostly catty, cant just answer, also have to insult. this is why women arent further ahead then we are

if the dr recommends it for THE GOOD OF THE BABY than fine, im talking about the ones who dont even try, they whine at one little contraction

Answer 1

I think moms are catty about everything. No I am not saying this to start a war :) I think we focus too much on what every other mom does. We put so much guilt and judgement on ourselves and each other. When you look out at a playground of kids, can you tell whos mom breastfed them, had drugs in labor, etc? I can't. Kudos to those of you who can. I think it's really sad that instead of helping each other and making each other feel good about our choices we make fun of one another.

My friend runs her home totally different then I do. But I think she is a great mom. I learn a lot from her because she does things different. We could all be learning from each other instead of being mean.

To actually anwser your question. I had drugs both times I had babies. I had to be induced with both kids, and I was in labor for 28 hours with my first and almost 48 hours with my second. I was tired. I am just not strong enough to sleep through blinding pain. If someone out there went without drugs for 48 hours of labor I want to shake their hand, you are a champ in my book. But I also let my drugs wear off so I could feel the pushing stage. With my second my cathader fell out (without me knowing) and I went drug free through pushing.

I know me saying it isn't going to magically stop women from judging one another...but maybe I made you all think about it a little. Look at it this way, women are the only ones who understand what you go through as a mother. No man would understand what labor is, meds or no meds. No man understands being pregnant, I don't care if they are an OB. No one understands you like other women. Stop bickering.

Answer 2

Ok, let me think, 20 hrs. of horrible pain or 20 hrs. of just waiting for the baby and pushing ??? Why feel pain when you can avoid it???? I think that if the technology is there why not use it, I'm damn sure that if the women before us would have had that option they would have taken it in a split second, now I ask you the opposite, Why would you want to go natural when you can have a more pleasant experience with an epidural or drugs???Maybe it was just a moment for you but I had my epidural and not regret it at all, after 20 hrs. of labor I was very happy I took it, I was very alert, and I'm a big girl that can take a lot but why suffer??? I love my baby the same, my mom, that had 4 children the "natural" way told me, you would be dumb if you don't have an epidural, so there you go... if you are looking for someody to say Bravo, you are so brave ..!!!! you won't find too many because most women prefer the option of not feeling pain not because they are ******* but because it is a logic human instinct, Pain or no pain???

Answer 3

Well first off my doctors forced epidural on me both times because I had been up for 24 hours already when I was in the hospital so they wanted me to get some rest because it is hard to give some pushes when you already feel like crap.

The other time I broke my water in the shower didn't even know it, went to the doctors and she didn't even want to come out. Anymore time they would've had to drug me up anyway to give a Cesarean as that is not natural. I was scared. Scared of losing my BABY. That is all I think about lying there in pain is my baby and how she's doing. You go 8-10 hours dilated to only a 6 and see how far you will make it. Pain, yeah I was in major pain. And was willing to deal with the pain and not sleep. I fought the doctors on it and my husband until my mother came in and she was going to come the next day to see the baby after she was born.

I may have had an epidural but guess what I had no tearing or cutting, or stitches. I had 7lb babys and did wonderful. The epidural has nothing to do with size hun.

Answer 4

I opted for no drugs at all, but I had to be induced and apparently even my doctor told me that some induced birth are more painful. After 10 hours I decided to get an epidural, which lets me sleep for 2 hours just before giving birth.

I told the doctor to give me a very low dose, I can feel everything, I can still move my legs, and I am much more aware of my surrounding than when I was in pain.

Due to the low dose, the epidural effects goes slowly away minutes before I start pushing and I still have the whole 'experience' as I push my baby. I am glad I had the epidural though, otherwise I would be too tired to push, as a result I had a natural birth without tear and baby is healthy!

I do think that women should try to 'handle' it as far as she can instead of just opting for epidural months before their labor. It's almost as sad as women who won't try breastfeeding before even trying it out.

Answer 5

i try not judge what other people do. i mean, if that was your choice, then good for you! I think it's great that you had your kids naturally, however, since you did have your kids naturally you don't know what it's like on the other side of the fence.

i am still torn on whether i plan to have a natural birth or have an epidural. i've asked all the moms i know for their experience and i'll probably have an epidural...but i won't know til i feel those contractions!!

now, most of the stories i have heard tell me that the epidural doesn't make you dopey or unaware of your surroundings. other drugs may do this, but an epidural simply helps numb the lower half of your body so the contractions and actual delivery aren't as painful. most women that i've talked to told me that they were completely lucid and aware and they just didn't have to feel as much pain!

so, i don't judge....neither should anyone else! that goes for you or anyone who is being mean in their answers.

take care.

Answer 6

I went natural and this was my first time and ya it pain full but I was alright the only thing I thought about was my baby will be here real soon and when it came time to push all I could think about is get her out. I waited 11 yrs for her I didn't want no drugs to efect her. My sister-in-law did 3 kids now drugs and her last one the nurse talked her into a epidural and she said it helped for the pain but when it came to push she said it didn't stop that pain at all. I feel like my next one will be natural too. some people I guess can't handle pain or are scared of the pain.

Answer 7

I totally agree with Mina222. Seriously, why would you want to hurt like that? Honestly, I have two children, one was natural the other I had help. After 20 hours of not dilating, and whining because I was so exhausted, yet couldn't sleep because my contractions were less than a minute apart, I BEGGED for the epidural. I am not kidding when I say that after the epidural I dilated from a 2 to a 9&1/2 in 45 minutes. So, if I ever have more children, BRING ON THE EPIDURAL!!!

Answer 8

I worked on a maternity floor in Arkansas and there is ALOT more women that ask for a epidural or even have their labor induced because they want to have their baby before a certain date! When I was pregnant i tried to go all natural but the last maybe 4-5 hours of my 32 hour labor I had a epidural just because I was having back labor and couldnt take it! But theres alot of women that have unnecessary c-sections because they dont want to stretch themself out..expecally celeberties. But I give the women who do it the best they can all my support rather than the people out there that just want to get it over with faster.

Answer 9

I have nothing against those who choose pain meds...I had my oldest 2 with an epidural and had back pains afterwards. My 3rd child I went natural but wanted something else other than an epidural, they had fetanol for your IV, well it was not all that bad. My last gallbladder attack when she was 2 months had me balled over and in tears and the labor with her did nothing to me...yes it hurt but as bad as that gallbladder attack. I have heard from women who had other kinds of pain say that labor is not bad at all. I am pregnant now and going natural again. Yes I am nervous, excited and scared and full of emotions but I know I can do it because I have done it before.

Answer 10

I had my son naturally. Not by choice of coarse. It just so happens because it was Sunday night, no anestesiologist were on hospital grounds. It was painful... I did get Staidol in an IV drip, but that was nothing. To aleviate my pain, I would dance... like a circular motion with my hips/... I something just told me to do it..that it would work( my little voice)it worked fabulously...the nurse said she had never seen someone dance the pain off...I did read afterwards, that dancing is a natural remedy for contractions. I didn't know this, but ironically my body did. My mom was with me and she was so proud. She says I never screamed out or anything...of course I don't remember what I said or did for those 5 hours.. but afterwards, I was proud of myself... my first child.. and I did without an epidural..yeah I had an IV drip, but that's like having nothing.