I have three kids from my first marriage. I remaried 41/2 yrs ago. My youngest thinks my husband is his real father. My kids bio father has not crossed words or payed any child support for the past 6 yrs. I've been thinking of telling him to sign off my kids, I don't want him to EVER have anything to do with my kids. He hasen't cared for them so far, what would make me think he will change is mind. God forbib something happens to me I don't want him to take my kids. My youngest has no clue who he is. My husband is willing to adpot my kids. Should I do it??
2006-08-24 08:34:06 · 17 answers · asked by yo_010180 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, let your current husband adopt the kids. It's better to have a family unit. If the bio-dad isn't a part of your lives, then what's the difference.
2006-08-24 08:36:44 · answer #1 · answered by Sir Greggath 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should. But figure out what you will do when the youngest finds out this is not his biological father (b/c thru this process he may find out). How will you handle it? Maybe consult a professional. Hopefully sooner rather than later your youngest will be okay with this & realize there is SO MUCH more to being a "dad" than donating your chromosomes. Good luck!I think in the long run you will be glad you did this. Like you said you wouldn't want "him" to have them if something should ever happen to you. I think you should at the very least have him sign off.
2006-08-24 08:39:12 · answer #2 · answered by Steph 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think your husband should adopt your kids. As far as "signing off" your kids...go to a legal clinic and find out how to do that the right way. Or call the County's Children and Family services who could inform you about how that works.
2006-08-24 08:37:26 · answer #3 · answered by Sleek 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i would definitely let him let him adopt them because if something happen to you, your husband (now) would be much more likely to take care of them well, than a dad they never knew, plus he plays dad to them already. Also if your 2 kids that know they have another father person are older than about 7 or 8 ask them of they want to be adopted or not by your husband(now), they will prolly say yes.
2006-08-24 08:42:39 · answer #4 · answered by alayna_angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definately, its best for the kids. Also, if your ex fights it there are still ways for you to get his rights revoked if he doesn't want them to be. However, you can ask for an agreement that any back child support be wiped out if he does sign off his rights, this might make him more inclined to do so.
Contact a lawyer.
2006-08-24 08:36:57 · answer #5 · answered by Nails 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would approach him calmly and give him the reasons he should sign them over...I think its great that your new hubby wants to adopt them, thats a real man.. I think its in everyones best interest that that happens..You have to think about the future..God forbid something happens to you, then your new husband has no rights to these kids..If "birthfather" wants them, he gets them, and from how it sounds thats not in your kids best interest. Talk to him rationally, and he should understand. Tell him that in the future if he wants to be in the kids future he can (thats if u want), but now they need their step dad...Best of luck too u..
2006-08-24 08:41:14 · answer #6 · answered by misstikal311 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say yes i mean dont hide the fact to your children that your husband isint there real father just tell them when there old enough to understan but i think its a wise decision then the kids have both parental figures
2006-08-24 08:37:08 · answer #7 · answered by Sherie T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a 20 year old son who's father had nothing to do with him his whole life and we made it. i married my husband 16 years ago and he helped me raise my son just like his own and i don't reget it one bit. you do what you think is best for your children and yourself. your husband is a good man to take in a strangers children and raise them thumbs up to him.it's one thing to be a sperm donor {if you know what i mean}but,it takes a real man to be a dad.
2006-08-24 08:45:40 · answer #8 · answered by country girl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes absolutely!! It was his fault for not contacting you. Unless you didnt let him know where you were--then you can be at fault in the courts. Talk to a lawyer first and see what can/cannot be done
2006-08-24 08:36:49 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
absolutely. be sensitive to your kids, though - keep in mind how they might feel about being "abandoned" by their birth father. i'm not saying to keep it secret, but be careful how you handle it. obviously you have their best interests at heart.
2006-08-24 08:38:14 · answer #10 · answered by kwanyin_mama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋