I am Gay.I don't know why I look at men in a sexual way. Is Gay genetic ? It would answer so many questions.

Question

I hear the reglious side. I also know that Gay feelings are real. I know that the Gay community is out in the public eye more than ever and most people don't care. But what do they really think? It's alright is you are Gay but I would DIE if my son or Grandchildren were Gay is the feeling most people leave you with. If Gay people had an answer as to why they see what they see....such relief. I also wonder if everyone thinks that all Gay men have anal sex. That is a myth. Please don't answer that your're perverted or "sick." I'm not, I'm a loving and giving person like most Gay men.

Answer 1

Mike, thank you for posting such a great question. I am a gay therapist and have covered this time and time again. The genetics theory failed some time back. Freud claims that humans are born with polymorphously perverse, which basically means that sexual orientation does not have a design, rather, it is purely environmental. If you look at history, there are tribes in Africa that require that males have a wife and a male lover, it is part of their culture, its accepted, and part of their social norm. In ancient Greece, it was customary for the nobles to have male lovers, I can go on and on. At any rate, our history is full of queers. We have the unfortunate task at being gay in a new nation that is still under control of the Church, no matter how you look at it. Religion is a whole different ball game, but it's not. Religions vary geographically, as do lifestyles of culture and we create our norms that we live every day. There is more to the world than what you've been told. You'll have to find out the rest on your own. I wish you the best as I do the others that happen across this. Kind Regards, CB

Answer 2

You are in serious need of some self-acceptance.
You are gay. All that means to me, is that when you think of men, you get sexy ideas. Just like I do. I am a straight woman.
I didn't choose to be one way or the other. I just was, and came to know it.
I remember as a teen, thinking how fun it might be to have sex with a girl. Then I thought, "no, I don't want to do that. I would always be lonesome for male parts."
I don't think I chose not to be gay. I chose not to act on a whim.
I enjoy being a woman. I enjoy men. I think some women are very sexy, but not in the same way men are to me.
I would not die if my son or grandchild were gay. I would hope they wouldn't be easy just like if they were straight. I hope they take care of themselves and love themselves.
If it is not a choice-then is it genetic? I couldn't tell you. But why would ANYONE choose to be in a life that is going to cause them to suffer so much prejudice and pain?
You are not perverted or sick, just confused. Read a lot, think for yourself, and care about your life and what you have to contribute.
Who you have sex with is a small (important) part of who you are.
I would give this advice to my son. Good luck, hon.

Answer 3

I don't know about genetic, as in passed from parent to child, but there do seem to be some organic, rather than environmental, causes. One theory these days is that something happens in the womb - hormone levels or something. They've found that the chances of a male child being gay increase (I think by 1/3) with every older brother he has, which is interesting. Anyway, I don't think anyone has the answers yet, but they're working on it. I personally believe that most of the time it's something you're born with.

Answer 4

Being gay may be genetic. I did research on gay orientation in university. What we did find out is that the caudet nucleus in the hypothalamus in gay men is simular in size to the regular straight female. Most human emotions, sexual as well, come from this specific area of the brain. Straight men have a larger size caudet nucleus. This of course does not mean that this is the cause of gay sexual orientation but it does lead one to believe that being gay is not a choice, it is a physical difference on the human brain that may cause it. Therefore you are either born gay or not. We also believe that this gay orientation might be transfered to another person genetically.

Answer 5

I would not say anyone was born to be gay. I do believe that some people are born with a predeliction to be gay. Just as some people are born with a predeliction to be alcoholic, a cleptomaniac, an adulterer, or to be a pathological lier. The Bible says, "Beware, your sins will find you out." Basically this means that when Satan discovers where your weaknesses are, he will pounce on them. Your job is to "deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow Christ". To deny yourself, means to deny yourself the luxury of dwelling in your sins. You are not alone. We all have temptations. No matter what they are, they are big to us. The gay people I have known are all caring, loving people. Some of my best friends have fought this battle. It is a battle that will be with you your entire life. You can face the fight, or lay down, play dead, and let it run your life over. The easy road is to give in, the better road is an uphill climb.

Answer 6

I would LOVE to know the answer to this question. (I'm not gay, by the way.)

If being gay isn't biological, then I'd be interested to know what your thoughts and feelings are toward your early caregivers (male and female) and whether you'd had any traumatic sexual events as a child.

I can't imagine why someone would be born attracted only to the same sex when they were born with the equipment to be with the other sex.

I appreciate your openness and honesty. That's how real problems are really solved, and how real answers are found.

Answer 7

Why would people *choose* to be gay over thousands of years when the entire time it has been shunned?? Why would they *choose* to throw up everything they have believed in for their sexuality? Why do some animals *choose* to be gay when they have primitive brains??

The only answer I can come up with is that it is not a choice, but something in your chemistry.

And for all you Bible literalists... Judge not, lest ye be judged. The Bible has quite a few bizarre instructions that made sense two thousand years ago, but not today. Love thy neighbor and let God sort the rest out.

Answer 8

There's no proof yet that homosexual feelings are genetic, but the Bible does teach that we are all born with desires that go against the nature and character of God, and that God calls us all to self-denial in some form or another. Homosexual behavior is just one of those areas. We all have something (or even many things) that feel very "natural" to us that God tells us not to do.

What is wrong with people who leave you with the feeling that they have accepted you being gay but wouldn't want it for their own children? They are trying to be nice to you and accept you, but they hope for something else for their own children. That's honest. Most parents dream of their children marrying and having children. They look forward to having a son or daughter-in-law and grandchildren. All that has to shift and change when their children "come out." How would you like them to respond?

Some homosexuals, just like some heterosexuals, choose not to have sex at all and to trust God and follow His commands.

Answer 9

I think I've read that there is a statistical correlation between gay guys and high testosterone on their mothers side. And yeah, differences in the brain. So definately biological, but you just have to look at how widespread it is in nature to know that. Good on ya for posting and stay proud of who you are!

Answer 10

Don't beat yourself up, I love gay men! You are the most understanding, loving, caring of our species!!! My brother in law is gay and is by far the nicest, most outgoing person I am proud to know.
I don't believe its genetic. Its how you feel and you cant help that. Be true to yourself and you will be much happier!
Good luck and God Bless!