Would u really let go of ur love that quick?

Question

this is extremely annoying..ppl ask ?'s of leaving their husbands/wifes...live in bf/gf's...(mostly girls ask)...but is it really that easy for u guys to get up and leave or just kick him out?....ppl change...but u were in love?...do u understand that meaning love?...or do u just get bored easily...im not married but ive been with my bf for 5 yrs and we're going to get married through the family and everything but sometimes i get so mad at him i try and call it quits....but im so scared he'll say ok...can u guys really live w/o the ones u love?...some complain abt husbands not helping them around the house??? thats such BS...if u really knew what LOVE means u wouldnt just get up n go....but this doesnt refer to young love or the kind that just happens and u have a kid so u both end of being on ur own....thats immature love.....does anyone get wht im saying...if u have a reason...STRONG reason to leave/divorce thats ok...but this stupid crap is really annoying....how do u feel?

Answer 1

I think that people are just searching for validation to their feelings. I know I ask people what to do about my problems and ask for advice just to share my hurt & get it out in the open. I doubt anyone really leaves their situation for petty reasons. There has to be deep seated issues that finally make the break up possible.

Answer 2

Listen, i totally understand. Love is a choice. It is not a "feeling."
The "feelings" which people confuse with love are romantic. Love is sacrifice. Love is an act of will. Read the Road-less Traveled, M. Scott Peck. Most people have no idea that love can be hard work, that it can try our patience, that love is challenging and not always easy. I too feel extremely annoyed when i hear people say, " oh we weren't in love any more..." about why they divorced. The truth is every relationship that makes it past the honeymoon phase will experience some tough times. It's like raising a child. The early years are exciting, fun, cute, eventually the teen age years roll around and as a parent you feel like pulling your hair out, your children really test you, but most of us don't cut them off. We CHOOSE to hang in there, we continue to love our children and we see them through these tumultuous years....How can we be like that w/our children and yet do not behave the same way w/our mates. I feel my husband is family and there would have to be some extenuating circumstances to rupture that bond. I can't imagine just walking out on family. I hope & pray that my husband feels the same way!

Answer 3

omg, hopscothchbunnies is so on point. im their right NOW.
people look for every excuse to not work on staying n a marriage, instead of being honesty with them selves about what really is making them unhappy. what happen to 50/50 love and commitment in a marriage, if u r not happy & not trying 2 better ur self why hurt the ones that r being there & loving u. i see it as we only get one life, one! if we go through life knowing what we know & not doing anything 2 change it so that we r happy. what really is the point? i live by that cuz all we're doing is walking around unhappy, & if we can't make ourselves happy how & why expect someone else 2 if ur not trying. we all want 2 be happy & in a family even childern know when the parents aren't happy, this isn't healthy 4 them as well.

Answer 4

I think, sometimes people confuse love and infatuation; it's hard to build a long-term relationship on infatuation alone - it fades away, leaving only resentment and problems. Also, there's often an expectation that simply because someone entered a relationship, they will change to suit the needs of their partner; but this really isn't something one can count on - one just can't pick and choose which traits they want their partner to keep, and which to discard. That said, there are so many ways for a relationship to go wrong; I don't think that break-ups are ever "easy" for anyone, but often they're better than the alternative.

However, I certainly wish people accpeted more responsibility in their relationships; it's ridiculous to point fingers and blame your partner for doing this or that - when you were the one who selected this partner in the first place!

Answer 5

Well for one, love is an action so if there is no action of love then what's left. Most peoples decision to end it are not snap judgements. It's usually something that is mulled over time and then a decision made as to what's best.