LADIES.Why won't you beleive that you're beautiful?

Question

I've never told a woman that she was beautiful and gotten a, "thank you, I know." I ALWAYS get, "no I'm not" , or "I'm ugly", or "You're crazy". Is bad self-esteem that rampant? Or do you just mistrust men's compliments because you think they're trying to get in your pants. I dunno... Maybe some of you have been told otherwise so many times by some ******, that you begin to beleive it. Just curious. Do you think your beautiful?

Thanks for all of your answers. Its also interesting that the majority of you assumed that I was talking about physical appearences, which is not always the case. I have told women in the beginning of a relationship or while on a date that they're beautiful. Since I don't really know her true personality, I am commenting on her superficial appearance and my first impressions of her. If I'm in a serious relationship, it takes on a deeper meaning. I don't wanna pick a best so VOTE for which one you all think is the best take.

Answer 1

I mistrust men's compliments because i think they're trying to get in my pants.

Answer 2

I think it is a combination of society's expectations and empty compliments that cause women to not take compliments on beauty sincerely. Society expects women to be thin and strong and to be able to do it all, so many women feel they fall short and are not worthy of feeling beautiful. Younger women learn that some men will say anything even if they don't mean it and are scarred by these empty compliments. I am overweight, but I still know how to be confident, and I am good looking. While some people may not think so, I think I am beautiful and so does my husband. My daughter thinks I am the most beautiful woman in the world.....who else do I need to confirm that to know I am beautiful? No one!

Answer 3

I think a lot of it is that many women don't believe guys are sincere...but yes, there is also quite a bit of low self esteem amongst the fairer sex.

If a guy compliments my looks/appearance I'll smile and thank him...that's not the time to get into an argument about "no, I'm not" whether I feel I look good at that time or not...I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and trust that he's expressing himself honestly...and since beauty is subjective, I have no right to disagree...he's saying what he feels so he's not incorrect, even if I don't feel the same...

Answer 4

Perhaps good men are seeing what we don't - which is who we are as a person. We should learn a lesson by that and be able to see that we are beautiful because of the person we have become and how we show that to others - Too often we compare ourselves to who we think is just a pretty face. Instead we should become the kind of person that everybody wants to be around, who lights up a room not with our physical beauty, but by the person we are, and how we treat others.

Answer 5

Most women believe that when they say they're ugly, men would like to compliment them more, and the women tries to get in a firmer relationship. Believe me I know! And no, I don't think I'm beautiful. I'm not a women so don't think I am. I'm younger than any of the people who answered your question and I don't believe in beauty when you're young.

Answer 6

Beauty is only skin deep. When someone tells you that you are beautiful, especially someone that doesn't even know you, you have to question their motive.
Also, I have this problem worrying about being conceited. If I just say thank you, then I am agreeing that I am beautiful and then I become a snob.
Now, my question to you, if you want to compliment a woman, why does it have to be about her looks? I personally want people to see the inside of me, not just the out.
I don't think I am ugly or beautiful, I think I am average.

Answer 7

I think it all depends on the situation the female is in. Personally, I know I USED to be a "knock-out", but I have since had a baby. Amost 4 yrs. later, and I still have not been able to convince myself that I am that good looking.
Also, even though the media has started portraying "everyday" people, there are still the celebrities who dominate the spotlight.
Those are jsut acouple personal thoughts.

Answer 8

That all depends on the situation... If im in a bar and a guy says something like that, then sorry, but it seems like a pickup line...

In a relationship its different.... If in a relationship a guy says one thing, but acts in a different manner well it sorta speaks for itself.... Actions speak louder than words do!!!

If a woman has had bad experiences with men (abusive relationships like my x) its hard to believe some things men say sometimes.... When you are treated badly by one man, unfortunately in some cases anyway, it kinda makes you lose your self-esteem and it makes it hard for you to believe in or trust another man for a while...

Just my opinion though...... Taken from my own personal experiences with men!!!!!

Answer 9

Hmmm. It really depends on who's telling me. If the man is really ugly or more than 5 years older than me I don't take it seriously and, usually just end the conversation there and blow them off for trying to get in my pants, If it's someone attractive who's still saying it in hope of sex I'll just say, "I know." If it's really a sincere compliment then I'll say "Thank you." Oh and, yes, I think I'm beautiful. I must be from the amount of ill attitude I get from other girls when I haven't done anything to them.

Answer 10

There are many reasons for this. Our society in general puts the "beauty bar" pretty high up. We are all bombarded at such a young age with images of emaciated women who never seem to age (thanks to plastic surgery) and so much emphasis is put on appearances and being perfect. Then you factor in that important people in our lives (Mom, boyfriends, best friends, husbands) like to point out our flaws quite regularly, it can be debilitating. Most men I have met over the years, make no bones about how hot people like Jennifer Lopez or Halle Berry are. I know that they don't usually do it on purpose, but it can really cut deep.

As a mother of 3 girls, I am always telling them how beautiful they are and letting them know that everybody comes in different shapes and sizes and they can all be beautiful, but it is hard for me to compete with boys and their reactions to women in the public eye. For the sake of all young women in this world, people in general (and more specifically, men) need to remember that their actions speak much louder than words.

Answer 11

I dont think, I know Im beautiful. The number one thing a confident person can do when complimented is just simply say "Thank you." nothing more or nothing less... just accept the compliment. You would if you were told you had a pretty dress on or your shoes were nice right? why not a pretty face? Thats a permanent accessory I think... : )