I had a gf for almost 7 years we met in the 7th grade.We are both 25 now.All through this friendship she has really hurt my feelings or tried to hurt me physcially.I lost contact with her 2 years ago on purpose then out of nowhere she calls and wants to hang out.Our friendship was 50/50 half bad times half good times.Should i hang out with her,by the way she's changed alot and not for the good.I can't tell her i don't want to be friends b/c i don't want to come off across rude.what do i do?
2006-08-24 04:03:11 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You can tell her you don' t want to hang out WITHOUT being rude. I think that would be best for your well-being. Think of a polite thing like "I really don't think we should hang out. We're on different paths/lives right now.".
Being a friend with someone you don't want to hang out with can be harmful to you and them.
2006-08-24 04:07:34 · answer #1 · answered by CH 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had something like this happen to me about a year ago. This did not work out. He would use me as cover to cheat on his wife. I didnt mind at first because I was able to hang out with an old friend but then I got caught up in some of his lies and things got real bad. his wife was calling and having her boyz as she called them come visit my house. It was way more drama than I needed. I finally called his wife told her everything that I could and promised that I would never talk to him or her again. I mean screw it he was being terrible as a husband and a friend and deserved it. It was terrible. I wish it would have not even happened but you cant take it back. I would say that people change and friendship comes and goes. Dont get wrapped up into something that you dont want any part of. Tell her your life is different now and that you would rather leave the history right where it is. In history.
2006-08-24 11:12:24 · answer #2 · answered by STEVE-0 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound to me like she was ever a good friend to begin with. If she hurt you physically and emotionally then you don't need her. You have spent all this time away from her and you don't seem to regret it. If you had said she changed for the better I might have said give her a chance. But you are saying she is even worse now. I would not worry about coming across rude to a person like this. It doesn't sound as if she has spared your feelings in the past. However, if you can't bring yourself to tell her then ignore her. Don't return calls or answer hers. Or just tell her you are too busy with things in your life right now. Eventually if you turn down her invites she will get the hint.
2006-08-24 11:10:33 · answer #3 · answered by geni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it hard to let go a friendship of 7 years but, in a friendship there no 50/50 was she your friend or not. she had hurt you before and you say she had change for worst so that mean she haven't change anything so it better to keep her away.
2006-08-24 11:37:08 · answer #4 · answered by Monica M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What exactly did she do? It depends on what all she did and if she did it on purpose, because all friends hurt each other, sometimes it's not intended. No one is perfect. I say hang out with her this time and see if she's changed any. If she has, then continue the friendship. If not, then discontinue it.
2006-08-24 11:07:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, I would just not go there. I think that you are sort of asking for trouble by opening up old wounds so to speak, and espescially if she has tried to physically hurt you, that is a sign that a person is just a problem.
Life will deal you enough problems....don't open the door to even more.
2006-08-24 11:06:04 · answer #6 · answered by teachinmom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you don't have to be rude, just be unavailable or too busy for her. you may just have to tell her in a nice way if she doesn't get the hint. there are too many wonderful people out there that are true friends to put up with someone like her. i wouldn't waste my time. just because you've known her for a long time doesn't mean you have to continue the friendship. you'll find thru your lifetime friends come and go. there are only a few that remain throughout your lifetime and she doesn't sound like one of them.
2006-08-24 11:12:16 · answer #7 · answered by sunnyca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u thnk that after spending sum time wid her u will not b mooning for her then there is no prob in going around but if u r still weak at heart then just dont bcoz once a liar is always a liar.u feel she has chnged,she might hav bcoz of a broken relationship in past 2 yrs,and now she is resorting on to u.
2006-08-24 11:07:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is obviuos that you are way better off not hanging out, Trust me I know first hand and If only I could do it over again I would not have hung out!!!! So please beleive me when I say "DON"T DO IT" and you seem to be a very sweet person and you should"nt worry about her feelings she didn't care about yours when she did wrong to you! I hope the best for you and "NO WORRIES" you will meet more friends who are worth your time and effort!!
2006-08-24 11:13:55 · answer #9 · answered by JENN 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, forget about her. Life is too short. You'll have many other true caring friends in your life. I am ending one of my friendships too, she doesn't make the same effort I do. I don't have the time or energy for her anymore. I'll miss her sometimes, but it will be for the best.
2006-08-24 11:07:31 · answer #10 · answered by Fleur de Lis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋