Been married for almost 9 years but together 11years. We have one son 8 years old. The problem is I want more children but because my husband refuse to take care of his health, we have a major problem, well he does. I get really frustrated because I feel if he would have taken better care of himself then it would not have been a problem. I am not getting any younger. I told him that he is selfish and if he don't give a damn about himself at least think about his children (our son, and his daughter 13,from a relationship before we met). We really don't have sex anymore. I am truly thinking about leaving. Guys what do you think, should I stay for the sake of our son or should I go? My son has been asking for a little brother or sister. I am afraid that if I stay, I will never have any more children.
2006-08-24 03:15:27 · 16 answers · asked by LuvAll 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hello, Sorry to hear about your bad situation, but I too am in a sexless and unhappy marriage for the moment!
I must say though, having 2 children that have been through divorce, you should stay FOR THE KIDS!
My ex husband and I thought the same thing but we divorced and the family split up, it was the worst thing that ever happened to my kids and that was 5 years ago and they are still having trouble and emotional problems due to the divorce!
I understand how hard it is to be with someone you are not happy with but if you can you should try to stay!
Get marriage counseling or if he won't go, then go alone at first and try to get some things worked out with yourself first and then you will have a clearer mind as to what you need and want to do!
Having this kind of stress can be very hard on you, if you do not have a close friend that you can talk too, then find someone your mother, preacher, etc...
Life is one of the hardest things in the world and you sound like you really love your son and want whats best for him, so I would say, please try to fix this, try to work it our for the kids and for the sake of your sanity! You were happy once and you should be able to get it back somehow!
I hope this helps, Good luck and God bless!
2006-08-24 07:41:09 · answer #1 · answered by iLoveDawnDawn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you this is the only problem you have with your hubby then you should stay with him and take care of your son.. He is inocent, he has nothing do with your differences.. Why he suffers?
A person can not get EVERYTHING in his/her life that he wishes for.. It things happens in a wise and natural way then it is welcome or else you can not afford to spoil the life of whole family...
Even if you choose the path of divorce then there is no surity that your would be hubby will satisfy ALL your expectations, there might be some other sort of issue.. so how long you will go on destroying and again creating the family??
If your son demands for little bro or sis and your hubby is not able to give then go for adoption..
All the best, we want to see you happy..
2006-08-24 03:23:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Do you love your husband? I get the idea that you are not very happy with the marriage overall and that everything has faded. Having a child with him is not a good idea anyway right now as things are with your marriage. If you have tried marriage counseling and are at your wits end then you should go. It is not healthy to live an emotionless marriage with someone who is selfish and not motivated to do anything. It is not good for the child either. God Bless you.
2006-08-24 03:21:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
this is a hard one. never stay for just the children you will make them miserable as well they can sence when things arent right but on the other hand you took a vow of better or worst sickness and health i have only been married once and still am he is abusive mentally to me but real good to the kids i feel the same way about leaving but i made a promise and will keep it he has gotten better but its a long hard road. i will keep you in prayer and whatever you choose i pray it be right for you and your children.
2006-08-24 03:22:20 · answer #4 · answered by faithfullyyours 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well,i guess you are being a bit selfish here....just because he is unwell and cant have kids you want to leave him,maybe there is more to this.....
men generally tend to get so busy and tied up with work and home responsibilities that there health is ignored,being a wife you should be helping him in taking care of his health...what are you there for if you cant support him when he really needs you?pls think what have u been doing......i know you too have a point but then you cant go to someone else for such a reason,leaving behind your husband and seperating the child from his father...
2006-08-24 03:24:59 · answer #5 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
are you able to deal with to pay for yet another place or do you have yet another place to circulate to?if so i might leave. my husband pulled that comparable little stunt. in the commencing up i became A B****. Then i've got been given mad. I did no lanudary, no dishes, no no longer something. I wash my outfits carried out in elementary terms what i had to might desire to consume out of. our residing house became nasty. yet he have been given the factor. by using the way i enable the residing house choose for 3 months. he began to help. on the time i became artwork 70 hours each and every week. as quickly as I cut back my hours right down to 50 he start up back. so i packed my stuff and went to my mom's. i lived along with her 2 weeks until now i've got been given a small apt. we live aside 6 months. now i come residing house. the home is clean, dishes carried out, laundary carried out. and supper waiting. He has no activity.
2016-09-29 22:34:52 · answer #6 · answered by greenwell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have a tough decision to make--it would be great to have a 2 parent situation.really tough for all nowadays. i had different situation but stayed in 30 years for the kids' sake--no regrets where my kids are concerned but REALLY difficult to start over at 51 with nothing
2006-08-24 03:39:29 · answer #7 · answered by phyllis_neel 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is unhealthy enough to affect his sperm count/quality, then I don't recommend your having anymore children with him. And if he is selfish enough to deny you this desire, then you should leave. If you stay, it wouldn't be "for the sake of your son" because unhappy parents equal unhappy kids, even if you can't tell he is unhappy.
2006-08-24 03:20:09 · answer #8 · answered by danika1066 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Go someplace alone without your son. Maybe a restaurant. Sit both of you down and tell him how you feel...but dont raise your voice just be calm. If he still doesnt start caring....then i would leave him. He wouldnt be worth it. I hope it works out for you and good luck!
2006-08-24 03:22:45 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, it sounds like your marriage is pretty much over, so look at that situation first.
As far as having more kids goes, that shouldn't be considered until you find the right man to be in your life
2006-08-24 03:22:15 · answer #10 · answered by aggie babe 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋