2006-08-24 02:49:30 · 18 answers · asked by my_a7lamy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You had your chance to ask before you married, if you thought there might have been a possible "dealbreaker" in her past. You need to examine your reasons for wanting to ask. If you have legitimate health concerns, you should see a doctor before you think of questioning your wife about past lovers. If you are feeling insecure, you might want to just state that to her instead, and open up a conversation with her. In time, with trust, all of that should open up on both sides, if it is relevant. I believe a couple should be able to discuss anything. The key is the intention behind the words. If you want to "one up," or pick a fight, keep your mouth closed and work it out, alone. You should only act out of love: wanting better for the other than you want for yourself. Treat your wife as your treasure.
2006-08-24 03:03:31 · answer #1 · answered by georgia b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure why not, married couples shouldnt have any secrets between them and as long u love each other, the past should remain where it is , in the past , as far as not hindering ur marriage or relationship.. i have no secrets from my husband.. and it makes life so much easier, sucks when u have to watch all that u say because ur scared how they will feel.. but usually thats the worst thing u can do, cause when people find out something they wonder why ur hidding it, and it becomes a bigger ordeal then it needed to be.. now if he doesnt ask about it, then u can always say well u didnt ask so i never told, but if he's asking the best thing u can do is be honest.. id hope that if he's your husband that u trust him enough to hear the information.. and u didnt marry some immature idiot that is going to take the information and use it against u later..
2006-08-24 03:01:11 · answer #2 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you can really like being lied to. Thats a pointless question to ask, because even if a woman tells you some about her past, the really nasty, juicy stuff would be left out of her stories. And if even if she IS completely honest, do you really want to know if she'd had an orgy with 3 guys and a circus seal? So I think its best not to ask because you're only asking for trouble.
ps. I'm not saying your wife made it with a circus seal, that was just a horrible example of what might've happened. I certainly don't know. I SWEAR!
2006-08-24 02:55:56 · answer #3 · answered by Frylock_80 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, the man should have asked about her past before they were married. Now that it is being brought up it should be talked about if he is curious. Many women and men don't like to talk about their past because they feel like they will be judged. Listen to everything with an open mind and remember that the person you are married to would not be that person, unless they had experienced that past.
2006-08-24 02:55:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, if you want to know about a woman's past ask before you get married. Of course this doesn't apply if you find evidence that she is a criminal or has engaged in some other heinous behavior. Then asking is the smart thing to do.
2006-08-24 03:02:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What difference will the past make!?! You may be her husband, but would you really want her to know ALL about your past? What happened and who she was before you were married shouldn't matter. It's who YOU fell in love with.
The best things in life are not about the past, but what you learn from it. When you marry...you go forward...never back...it's what makes for a much happier marriage.
2006-08-24 03:01:37 · answer #6 · answered by rdhedhottie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends on what ur gonna be asking.. if it's about past relationships then that might not be a good idea because u might get jealous or u might have her relive a bad past..
why not just ask is there anything of importance that i should know about ur past...
2006-08-24 02:54:25 · answer #7 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not unless you can handle the truth. If you THINK you can,don't ask. You'll only make problems for yourself.What's in the past should stay there.
2006-08-24 02:54:28 · answer #8 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most men do not want to know about their wife/girlfriends past. I guess it's okay if she wants to talk about it, but if she doesn't, then don't bother her about it.
2006-08-24 02:52:49 · answer #9 · answered by Xena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband asked me and now he just cant get over it. he throws it in my face every time we agrue... so no i dont think you should. the past is the past. unless you have some sort or STD or something like that
2006-08-24 02:58:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋