would you start a relationship or friendship with a dying person?

Question

What if you met someone and they only had up to say 15 years life because of illness. What if you met someone as a friend who would die within a year. Would you go ahead anyway or would you avoid getting close........?

Answer 1

If I met them and liked them, I would go ahead with our friendship. Even if its a short time, its better than no time!! Some people are in your life for a short time anyway, without death.

Answer 2

Yes, yes... I understand what everyone here is saying. But until you watch someone die you cannot say those things. My reply to this question would have been the same as yours 5 years ago, until I met a guy who was a haemophiliac. Great friend, changed my life. Died 18months later eventually of septicaemia.

Oh yes.. "Think of the happy times" you say. "He'll always be with you". But it doesn't stop the deep frustration and anger and hurt that accompanies the loss. The fact that we had such a short time together was the annoying part.

But on the other hand...

If someone said to me, "You can have him back, for just a year", I think I'd still say yes-even for just the year because I miss him every single day.

It hurts, like hell, and sometimes the memories are no comfort at all, and just make things worse. But I guess that's life...

Answer 3

i does not hesitate commencing/protecting a friendship with a terminally unwell individual, nevertheless i'd probable continuously have it interior the lower back of my ideas that the guy does not be around very long. i won't be able to say for constructive if or how that would desire to impact my functionality interior the friendship. undesirable because it sounds, I doubt i'd enter into an intimate relationship with a terminally unwell individual. i'd desire to be their chum, yet i do no longer understand if i'd desire to start up a relationship understanding earlier to time it would end. human beings will argue that any persons would desire to be taken down at any time and that's authentic, yet that is no longer the comparable as understanding at present that your chum would be taken from you in xx years, and which you have little-to-no risk of starting to be previous jointly. i'm constructive which will sound chilly to many through fact all human beings merits the possibility to love and be enjoyed, yet then i assume you may desire to settle on how lots heartbreak you may take care of previously you're taking the plunge. examine out the (previous) action picture dark Victory with Bette Davis. the story is rather lots alongside the strains of your query.

Answer 4

if I wasn't married and I met someone and it was love at first sight then it wouldn't matter to me that time was running out - just that we had what precious little time together is all that counts, if I met someone as a friend and they wanted more but told me they were dying, I wouldn't go out with them out of sympathy but I would try and stay a friend and help out when I could. if it was a bf who I was about to finish with before I knew, I would be absolutely gutted and feel that people would think I had ended the relationship because of his illness (I would probably stay for a while, then break it off gently when he had come to terms with it a bit more)

Answer 5

That's a strange question. I don't mean that in a nasty way. What I mean is that how do any of us know when our time will be up on this earth? We all have the right to love, to be loved, even if we were to die tomorrow. The only difference is that perhaps this person knows for sure and we don't.
I don't think I would hesitate. One never knows what life will bring.

Answer 6

Its a responsibility to be a friend, you have to be there for a friend when he or she needs you most, and that would include the slide toward death. Thats pretty unpleasant, so its a responsibility not to be undertaken lightly. 15 years is a long time to live, tho, there'd be the opportunity for lots of good time during then. But otherwise, think seriously about it because you might have to see and experience some very unpleasant things.

Answer 7

If I had a year to live...I wouldn't be looking to make NEW friends....I'd be looking to repair the relationships I had that needed repairing, to ask for/give forgiveness in those relationships that needed it...spend time with those closest to me, making peace with them before I go, and to leave them with peace after I was gone...maybe do things I'd procrastinated on, or finally make a scrapbook for my kids that I never did, etc. etc.

Unless someone has no one in their life, I don't see being terminally ill as a time I'd be drawn to make new friends...unless I were really having problems dealing with it and the new friend was from a support group for terminally ill patients, who would be dead in a year as well! If that acquaintanceship were conducive to us both for support, but wouldn't let that take away from the short time I had left with the ones who were in my life for years...I wouldn't be "making new memories" with new people, but resolving the memories/relationship with the old people!

If someone had 15 years, it would make no difference to me than if they had 100 years...if I liked them and wanted the friendship, I'd go for it, but wouldn't do it out of pity!! Any more, I wouldn't even call someone a friend till I knew them quite well...once bitten, twice shy and all that!

Answer 8

I would be their friend that would give me the opportunity to possibly make there last years more enjoyable. Everyone needs a friend.and a person that is sick and knows they are going to die has alot of fellings and emotions to deal with and a friend could be there for them to talk to,and have someone to share than pain with.and It would make me feel better knowing that I gave this person my friendship when maybe no one else would.

Answer 9

You could meet someone today, become really close and they could get hit by a bus in six months. If they are a good person they are worth knowing and investing time in regardless of how much time they had left.

Answer 10

Yes, even though I know we'll have a limited time. And it will also make that person die happy for someone loved him/her despite the situation.