When starting over how can you learn to trust men again after being lied to and cheated on repeatedly?

Answer 1

Forgiveness is the first thing you have to do. Not for the man who lied to you, but for you!
Then you have to realize that all people and circumstances are different. There is always a risk involved in trusting someone. But if you don't trust and have faith again, then you do not have a chance at any relationship.
Following your heart and instincts is always a good thing too. Best of luck!

Answer 2

It would be hard for me to trust someone again who'd lied and cheated on me numerous times. You might get to a point where you'll say you trust him, but the first fight that you have even if minor...it will come up and bring back all the bad memories. You might be able to put it aside but I doubt you'll be able to trust him again.

Answer 3

Does this happen a lot? It shouldn't. Not all men cheat. But if you keep having this problem, you might want to spend a little time alone. Learn to be happy alone before you spend time and energy finding a relationship.

There is never any rush.

Good Luck

Answer 4

You just have to work on yourself before entering another relationship and then know that your ready for a new one. Do self esteem exercises to become more confident in those areas. But most of all you just look at every individual as a new person starting off. And giving them a chance.

Gayle

Answer 5

well, you have to be honest with your new partner about what happened and that it is an "issue" for you.

you'll have trust problems until you get it figured out in your head- like what signals did you miss, what was the "warning signs" etc.

then you have to make a point of GIVING trust to your new partner- try to assume that any of his behavior that triggers your bad feelings from your issue is INNOCENT unless you have REPEATED proof that he's being dishonest, disloyal or unfaithful.

It's not up to HIM to live around your issue but to help YOU grow BEYOND it...it CAN be done.

Answer 6

It's a hard thing to do. I think I just realized that the person that I'm with really loves me and wouldn't hurt me. Besides that, if somebody is gonna cheat on you they're gonna do it whether or not you're worrying about it, so why spend all of your time miserable if you're not having any positive effect on the situation.

Answer 7

First I am sorry you have been lied to and cheated on, been there done that, it is not fun.
Now you need to give yourself time to grieve for losing something you thought you had and it would last forever. This is in itself a death so allow yourself to cry, scream, beat up a pillow, or take up boxing or karate lessons. Something to allow you to vent.
Next consider yourself give your time to you. Indulge, be nice to yourself like go out for a nice meal, take a candle lit bubble bath or anything that makes you happy.
Now you are on your way to finding what you want in life. Do you want someone to spend the rest of your life with or do you want someone only there occasionally. The reason I ask ( and after you have completed the first two steps you ask yourself these questions) my friend finally married after a horrible divorce, after 20 years of marriage to a man she thought was faithful only to find out he wasn't for most of their marriage, to a kind man whom she gets along great with they have one catch though. She lives in her house and he lives in his only a block from each other but they each have their space.
And they have been happy for the last 15 years.

Answer 8

My ex husband lied about everything, take time and get to know someone and dont sleep with them untill they have earned you trust. when you are abused you get paraniod and you think nevery partner is going to be the same way, it takes time, i had flashbacks about ny ex and i punished my current boyfriend for it for a while, i dont do it any more

Answer 9

Hi well don't go find your man in a bar! they will not turn out to be the man you want in the long run. but all guys are not butt heads and will treat you like a Queen My wish goes out to you that the right man comes into your life Soon.

Answer 10

Find A person of similar values and one who is not interested in the latest model. Set your boundaries and TAKE YOU TIME. It can be done but healing has to take place first!