Okay, is this guy hitting on me or is he just an idiot?

Question

alright, first off, i am married and i have a beautiful 8 month old son. okay, my husband and i just moved to a new town, and are slowly meeting new people. he has a couple friends at work that have invited us over for dinner a time or two, one of which is who my question is about. we'll call him jack. my husband has lunch w/ one of two guys most often at work, and i had to get ahold of him, so i called both of the guys. jack told my husband the next day that i had hit on him, (he then said haha just kidding) well, my husband car pools to work and every once in awhile if i am in the same town at the right time, i pick him up so we can ride home together, well, while i was waiting for him, jack comes up to our truck and gets in with me, grabs my little boy and starts playing with him, LICKS HIM, yeah...licks him...i am about to come unglued, and finally my husband comes out. i am polite to the guy because he is my husbands friend. well, today the same thing happneed, but he

didn't wait until my husband came out to leave, in fact he left right before my husband came out. when i am waiting on my husband, i keep all the windows up and the radio on, and try to ignore this guy and not acknowledge him, but he just comes up and hops in. anyway, i dont' know the guy well at all, and i am not comfy w/ strangers as it is, so am i being paranoid?

p.s. my husband didn't see him lick my son, and i told him on the way home about it, and the only time my husband sees the guy anymore is on company grounds, and he would get arrested for kicking his ***. (he's an engineer and they have really strict security rules about things like that) my husband can't tell either if he's just an idiot trying to be cool and friendly or if he's being inappropriate, and doesn't want to jump to a bad conclusion immediately...this is a very recent situation

a little info about the guy...he may not realize how inappropriate the lick thing was, he may just rate it with blowing raspberries on his stomach like a lot of people do, but this same guy also wears a hefty bag under his clothes to help him lose weight. no i'm not kidding

just for the last answer, eric i think, i am not looking to be hit on by this guy, i love my hubby more than anything else in the world, but my husband is the only guy i've ever dated and i don't really know what it looks like to be hit on, if that makes sense. i'm not some troll that would never be hit on, i just don't have a lot of experience in that area and don't want to make a bad error in judgement

and for the final detail....MY HUSBAND KNOWS ALL ABOUT THIS AND IS JUST AS TAKEN ABACK AS I AM. I AM NOT SURE WHERE I SAID THAT I HADN'T TOLD MY HUSBAND, BUT A COUPLE OF YOU MISUNDERSTOOD THAT POINT

Answer 1

I think its about boundaries too. If you feel he is being over friendly then you feel he is being over friendly. A womans intuition and all that.. Everyone has different comfort levels and if yours are being crossed and you want to address it then thats what you should do. The easiest thing may be just to ask what hes doing as he does things that push your boundaries (approaches to close or plays with your son).

If you dont want to confront him seek your husbands opinion, he should at least be able to set your mind at ease or give you an insight on the guy if hes becoming friends with him. On the other hand he may have noticed hes a bit strange too. Either way he will be aware how you are feeling and will be able to help.

Answer 2

Try locking the doors. If he knocks, as if for you to open it, roll the window down just enough for him to talk, but not get his hand inside to unlock the door. Tell your husband to speak to him about getting into your car, and especially about licking your child. Whether or not he is hitting on you is beside the point, unless that is what you are hoping for. If it is not what you are looking for, you need to make it very plain, to the point of being rude if need be, that you do not appreciate his "sense of humor" and "private attempts to get close to you". People like that can cause a lot of marital doubts and problems that need not be added to all the other problems we must face in life.

Answer 3

Why not just lock the doors?............... then if he approach the truck you can let the window down as little as you like, preventing him any access at all.

Why haven't you told your husband about this? By not telling your husband, you are telling Jack it's OK. Who are you protecting? You are allowing your husband to look like a fool by keeping him in the dark. You can't possibly keep down trouble for a guy that causes you a problem. Again, whose side are you on? Silence protects the guilty!

Let the world know! "Nothing comes between you and your husband. My wife wouldn't fix my "brother" a dinner plate if I haven't eaten yet.

P.s. ............ LICKED your son............. and you'll be wondering "what's causing him to break out"?

Answer 4

From your description he sounds like an idiot but then if he is hitting on you and you are married he is an idiot. Sounds like he is wishing you had hit on him. Why didn't your husband knock the **** out of him? If someone licked my child I would grab the asshole by the tounge and sling him around the yard. The human mouth is a breeding ground for bacteria.

Good luck.

Answer 5

Lock you car doors. Speak to him from a crack
in the window. I bet the women on the job have
alot to say about him. He's already shown he has
little respect for your marriage. He would stir things
up, then laugh about it. Licking your child is gross,
very germy. Tell him not to. A dog was licking on him
at a friends house. Ha ha ha

Answer 6

Look here Job is important but not as important as family ,and he sounds to me like a sick man ,stay away from him ,your husband needs to question him in front of you one day about licking his baby ,that makes me angery .your husband can handle this away from work and it needs to be done now !!!he needs to go to him and say ,stay away from my wife and baby and why did you lick my baby ? he needs to say something dont let this go ,he had no right doing that to that baby ,at all I am mad and I dont know you ,I love children and he disrected that baby .good luck let me know how it turns out ok .

Answer 7

He sounds like an idiot and a paedophile.
does your husband knows whats been going on??

Answer 8

Set your boundaries woman. If you don't, people will walk all over you idot or otherwise.