this was over 10 years ago. i saw her on the weekend and she is now a lesbian, and all her friends are les/gay. should i tell her friends wat she was like at school, or just forget about it?
2006-08-23 17:55:35 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
she made my life hell at school
2006-08-23 17:58:59 · update #1
I never understood homophobia. Even when I was in the closet, I never abused homosexuals at all. But I guess everyone acts differently under pressure. I was tormented in school too and it's still hard for me to forget. I suggest confront her about it and demand an apology. That's what I always wanted to do.
2006-08-23 18:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should confront her. You should get her alone, and let her know how badly she treated you. You have the right to tell her that she hurt you for being (I'm assuming) what she is now. A lesbian. She made your life hell, but I imagine it was because she was going through an internal one of her own. It doesn't excuse the fact that she was hateful to you, and you should ask her for an apology. If she has any soul, she will give you one in front of her friends. She is probably embarrased and confused as to handle the situation, so go right ahead and give her an opening. As far as telling her friends, it's possible that she's changed and we should give everybody the chance to turn over a new leaf. Keep an weather eye on her though, until she's proven you can trust her.
2006-08-24 01:26:16 · answer #2 · answered by Autumn BrighTree 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd like to hear a real apology a whole lot more than paying back with anger so many years later. Probably more satisfying to talk to her. You get to be the one with the power since she's the one carrying the guilt (hmmm, and most likely now hiding that she was a complete homophobic a-hole). And, hey, if her life was hell at the time, might be nice to hear first hand. If she whine's "poor me," I'd call it an opportunity to put it in her face to explain how her problems justified taking it out on me. Make her sweat a little and own up to what she did. Then forgive her, and let it go 'cause ya got a little direct satisfaction and didn't have to resort to public lynching like she did you. Anyway, that's what I'd do.
Oh, and PS, if she doesn't get it and is still an a-hole, out her.
2006-08-24 01:29:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, that would not be right. Think about why she was that way in high school. Think about all of the homophobic people that finally come to grips with the fact that they gay. I'm sure she is embarrassed by her past behavior and it causes her much pain. This is something she already might have shared with her friends. Two wrongs do not make a right.
2006-08-24 02:10:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep in mind that when she was making your life hell, she was in a worse position. How do you think HER life was at the time?
By blabbing to her friends about her past, you'll look just as bad as she did 10 years ago.
Let it go and remember she was in her own hell when she was making your life hell. Misery loves company.
2006-08-24 09:51:07 · answer #5 · answered by Jake 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should get to know her and her new life. Maybe you should talk to her, see if she ever regreted doing what she did, if she ever went to counceling, if she ever apologized to anyone.
You feel justified in still being angry, but don't let bitterness ruin her if she's made a genuine, positive change. Plus, you might feel better in the short term, but you'd most likely feel guilty about it later on.
Talk to her. Tell her who you are. Ask her why she did those things. Find out if she's a changed woman.
2006-08-24 01:25:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yeah, its called fear. She was afraid of her own feelings and taking it out on other homos. I was very much afraid of gay/les people when I was in the closet and didnt like to see them or hear about them because deep down I knew I was gay. No, I would just leave it alone and be happy that we have one more out of the closet.
2006-08-24 01:02:30 · answer #7 · answered by arielsalom33 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just let it go.
Many extreme homophobes are actually closet gay/lesbians anyway. She just solidified this notion.
Let it go, be the bigger person and just forget it.
2006-08-24 01:43:35 · answer #8 · answered by DEATH 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can only hope that she is truly sorry for her past actions. taking revenge may be satisfactory in the short term, but will really not help you nearly as much as forgiveness; or at least, leaving well alone.
Rose P.
2006-08-24 01:26:43 · answer #9 · answered by rose p 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can tell them but you might come off looking petty because no matter how you try to explain to them how cruel she was her argument will be, 'That was in my youth and I didn't know better.' Let it go.
2006-08-24 08:04:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋