is not calling you anymore to inform you that he is either at his friends house or will be home in awhile. No longer does he commit to what you want him to do. How would you as a parent handle this situation, I am really having a rough time and am hurt very much by his actions of being disobedient?
2006-08-23 17:24:14 · 10 answers · asked by Loveley 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Until he is 18 years old you are legally responsible for ALL of his actions - YOU can and will be sued if he harms someone in a car accident, etc.
Tell him he can do one of two things - make it simple:
He can have respect for your house, your rules and show he can be treated as an adult by being responsible, i.e., informing you where he is, getting himself to school, making his own money, etc.
OR
you are more than willing to take him to family court and let a judge decide what he is going to do, including joining the military.
It will not be easy, but make it absolutely clear you are not kidding, and then follow through.
He must also know that if he violates the terms of your agreement before his 18th birthday, the other "option" immediately comes into play.
You have to be tough, and this will be hard, but otherwise you are in for a lot of heartache.
2006-08-23 17:38:23 · answer #1 · answered by D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Rough age and it full of testing. He's testing you too. I would go easy on the not so important stuff, but insist that he tell you where he is going and when he will be back. Insist on a curfew, expect him to keep up his responsibilities in the family. Stop being hurt and start being a no nonsense parent. How is he getting over to his friends for instance? Driving a car? Remove the car. Smarting off, staying out late, getting into trouble at school, becoming someone you don't know could be a sign of something serious, get him into family counseling.
If he's just acting out, then treat him accordingly. He's not a little boy any more and he can't expect to treated like a young man if he's not going to do his part.
Unfortunately this is how they separate from us, the best you can do is set the rules and expectations and when he does them, praise him and when he doesn't, follow through on the consequences. Don't be afraid to be firm, you are not his friend, you are his parent.
2006-08-23 17:34:01 · answer #2 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you take the car away then he can't go anywhere. Remind him he is not showing you that he can behave like an adult and until he can be more considerate of others and their feelings his car and any money you give him will stop. My dad used to take my car and it bout killed me. He would go out and lift the hood to disable the car and would not tell me what he did to it. You or your husband may know how to pull a plug or unplug the alternator. Don't let your son know you did it. But talk to him and explain what his behavior is doing to you. Being a parent is a very difficult job. Stick to your guns and have faith.
2006-08-23 17:33:27 · answer #3 · answered by jagbeeton 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not acting like he's 18! He's acting like he's nuts! And you are letting him. Are you the parent? Is he your child? I don't care how old my children are they will always be mt children. They will also, ALWAYS give their mother and me the RESPECT that they have been taught to give.
You better straighten up and take charge of your house.
By the way, if he pulls that, "I'll leave!" crap. Then pack him a bag. And be sure to include ONLY the clothes and toiletries, etc. that HE bought and paid for, and you can LOAN him a few dollars but tell him that you expect to be repaid.
2006-08-23 17:33:20 · answer #4 · answered by Dahs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't do what he is supposed to, i.e. his chores, take responsibility for his school work, etc..then take away his extras.
Take away the car, take away the tv, the video games.
As a parent you are only required to feed him, clothe him and give him a house to live in.
If he wants to be treated like an adult, then he needs to accept the responsibility that comes with being an adult and follow the rules for the last year he has at your home.
2006-08-23 17:28:19 · answer #5 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is eighteen for Gods sake!Cut the imbilical cord already!!If he doesn't want to confide in you try not to be so darn pushy,remember he is legally a man now!
2006-08-23 17:28:05 · answer #6 · answered by Alli G 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Leave him alone, treating him like a kid is not preparing him for the real world.
2006-08-23 17:27:30 · answer #7 · answered by Mortimer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
pack his stuff and have it ready for him too move if he thinks he`s grown
2006-08-23 17:40:05 · answer #8 · answered by me too 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good 4 u.
treat him like he is already an adult.
2006-08-23 17:25:59 · answer #9 · answered by hsarora47 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
put your foot in his ***
2006-08-23 17:38:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋