My boyfriend and i have been dating for two years. we got ingaged in june but he wants to wait three years before we get married. But that is not soon enough for me. I am just confused about what he wants.What do you think?
2006-08-23 15:50:42 · 12 answers · asked by Little splash 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you guys should talk about it and compromise. Does he have a reason? Are you really young? Finishing school? Have unfinished goals?
My experience is that you should do all that you want to get done before getting married. If you don't; thinks are meant to go wrong - happened to me.
Chances are he's scared right now; maybe he'll change his mind and you can renegotiate down the road.
2006-08-23 15:54:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you don't want to wait then break it off and Move ON !! Besides who knows, he could be putting you off ,waiting for something better to come along!!! meantime he is keeping you hanging on!! I don't think you should perssure anyone into getting married either, that won't work out in the long run, so if he's not ready now he may never be?? Most peole should wait 2 yrs before getting married in order to get to know each other very well and there likes and dislike and so forth, and some people can put on an act( being the nice guy...) when you first get with them and it takes 2 yrs before they can stop acting( If they are ). Most can't act over 2 yrs so after 2 yrs you can tell who that person truly is, cause this is why you here people saying, he or she changed when i married them!!!
2006-08-23 23:03:04 · answer #2 · answered by sports_runner_racing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am assuming he's the one who did the asking so I would have to assume that he in fact wants to marry you. He is planning on spending the rest of his life with you (I hope anyways if he's planning on marriage). Maybe that thought just gives him a little bit of cold feet (not about you personally but about the thought of such a serious lifelong commitment) or maybe you are both still pretty young. Him wanting to wait could be a good thing. It could indicate maturity and stability. If you will be spending the rest of your lives together anyway, what's the rush? If you don't push and the two of you carry on as bf and gf (or an engaged couple, however you want to look at it) and you never know...a year down the road he may decide he can't wait two more years. Try to relax, you have all the time in the world (I'm assuming you're not about to collect old age pension or anything, lol). Best of Luck.
2006-08-23 23:02:34 · answer #3 · answered by Super-Mom9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hard to say; but someone already has mentioned the most obvious; he's looking for sex and no commitments! most guys are like that, unfortunately. I think when a guy truly loves someone and is serious about marrying, it doesn't take longer than 2 years; as a matter of fact, when you find the right person, it will happen so fast and so natural and it's great!
On the other hand; he may truly be unsure so it's up to you if you want to wait for him, it could mean wasting 3 years of your life waiting for nothing. In that time you could meet the 'one'....
I truly believe that money and beauty as requirements for love will always fade away but true love lasts forever!
2006-08-23 23:04:06 · answer #4 · answered by IamwhoIam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you need to wait so long. You either want to be married or not. What happens in three years? How old are you? Are you going to be going to school? Are you living together.
You need to ask him why he wants to wait. If he does not have a good reason, get married in a year(that about how long it takes to plan) or move on he is does not really want to commit.
2006-08-24 00:16:13 · answer #5 · answered by ab3mom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 years is quite a long time, honey. 2 years is even pushing it. I know this can't be easy to hear, but I think he may have proposed without being completely sure about it. My advice is to sit down and talk about it, and ask him to completely level with you. Ask him to be completely honest. If he insists that there are no worries that he has, then ask him why he's refusing to get married before three years are up.
Just remember: it's infinitely easier to find out someone's not really the one and break it off while you're engaged than it is to get married and go through a divorce. I've done both - trust me on this.
Best of luck, honey.
2006-08-23 22:55:44 · answer #6 · answered by *huge sigh* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is absurd. He wants to wait 3 years to marry you and you've already been together for 2.....I'm sorry but that doesn't sound to me like a man in love. I would break off the engagement. If he can wait three years to marry you, he's just stringing you along.
Find yourself a new man. Someone whose not afraid of committment.
2006-08-23 23:36:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should wait because if you really love him you should be able to wait. Obviously there is a reason he wants to wait so you need to respect that.
2006-08-23 22:53:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not see anything wrong with waiting....if you love each other 3 years is not that long......
2006-08-23 22:52:46 · answer #9 · answered by thats me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he's the one you love, then wait... probably have a good talk with him, get him to understand you...
2006-08-23 22:55:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋