For adults... what do you do when...?

Question

OK I just had a 13 year old radomly IM me. I can't help but feel akward talking to a 13 year old. This person asked me to be their freind, but I didn't really know how to explain that they shouldn't be talking to me, even though I have no malicious intentions. I didn't want to be mean or anything. I asked if his/her parents knew that they could talk to adults on IM, and this kid said yes. Has this ever happen to you? How did you handle it?

Answer 1

About the way you did. I tell them that it's not appropriate and that if they make a habit out of talking to adults, they may find one with really bad intentions. When the kids get to be 16 or over, I feel a bit better about helping them with things, though I don't ever get too close to anyone that young.

Answer 2

You know, this is such a hot button topic right now; especially in light of the sicko John Karr that supposedly killed the Ramsey girl in Colorado a decade ago.
There's evidently a lot of predators out there that think they're anonymous behind their firewall and they're free to victimize people that don't have the maturity and experience to fend for themselves yet.

This reminds me of a time years ago when I was traveling a major interstate in the middle of the night and came upon a little girl around 13 to 15 years old hitchhiking. I feared for her safety just like you did here, so I pulled over and asked if she was OK. She wanted a ride so against my better judgment I let her in and drove her to the next town, lecturing her the entire way about letting strange men pick her up on the side of the interstate in the middle of the night. I didn't know what else to do.

She didn't have any particular destination so I pegged her for a runaway and brought her to the police station. She was angry with me at first, but the police got her parents on the phone and hopefully got her back home safe.

So in answer to your question, I think we all have a duty to try and educate kids and should help protect them, regardless of whose kids they are. It's the right thing to do. If you don't do it and the very next person they IM turns out to be a particularly crafty serial pedophile rapist, where would we be? Take care of each other people!

Answer 3

www.nickjr.com
ha ha ha . just kidding. I'm almost afraid to make any new friends because i don't want someone to be lying about their age. I started using the internet when i was 16. had a really good online friend who was 28. he was really nice to talk with and helped me through the hard teenage times, we talked for like 4 yrs. i don't know what to do about it though. now days things are outta control. it doesn't hurt to say hi, or help with school work or something, but i would feel weird too.i don't know what to do about it though especially with 2020 busting internet perverts all the time and stuff.

Answer 4

I deal with kids quite a bit around here as the parents of these kids are too lazy to look out their door once in awhile to check on them. Consequently they come into our yard and want to talk about everything under the sun. I have set rules about talk with these kids and it works out quite well as they trust and like us very much. I like these kids because they do have some sense about themselves and want to learn about things. Once in a great while one will ask about sex,or somethings close to sex. I tell them point blank that these are questions they need to ask their parents and it's not up to us to answer that sort of questions. They go on talking about other things right away. I think it is important that adults not go crazy wild about kids questions and make them fear to ask. Just let the parents deal with the more pertinent questions about sex-pregnancy and the like. I think that adults should spend more time with their kids and let them know about the world around them.

Answer 5

I see what you mean, but what can you do? If the parents want to raise the child that way, there might be nothing you can do about it. If you don't want to talk to them, you don't have to, but worst case scenario, you do, which isn't against the law (last time i checked.)

EDIT: What's the deal?? If you think you're going to end up in this kid's bedroom with a 4-pack of wine-coolers, just because you're having a conversation with them, you've got bigger fish to fry!

Answer 6

Mine was a 14 year old boy. I asked him why he was talking to me since I am 23. his answer was because I want to. I told him I didn't talk to any one under the age of 20. he kept insisting so I finally put him on ignore < I felt bad but I sure don't want to be reported .

Answer 7

I think people really have to stop freaking out about this kid/online thing...

The kid needs a friend and you have no bad intentions... I say talk to him... you are an adult and you know what you shouldn't talk about...

Kids need guidance and not all of them are blessed with great parents - better you than a perv!

Answer 8

Wow. At least you are concerned for the child & that is admirable. I'd just talk to them & tell them that there are bad adults on here. Even adults pretending to be children. Tell them to be careful. It's never happened to me. But good luck.

Answer 9

Block them, better to be safe then sorry. I believe you but I don't believe the "so-called " 13 year old. Unfortunately it is one of the unpleasant facts of life on the Internet. Their parent is aware? Well either their parents are morons or the kid is lying.

Answer 10

They just want an adult to talk to that isn't their parents. As long as it isn't sexual, its all good. If you don't want to talk just block them. They'll never know the difference between that and you're just never on. If you're worried about them finding a predator, then why won't you talk to them? If you won't talk, they just move to the next person they find.

I was that kid and it was really hard. I just started lying because I just wanted to talk to someone and no one would. Its funny, when you say you're "16", its fine to say exactly what you, as a 14 year-old, want to say.