need a woman's advice?

Question

i have been married to my wife for 3 years now
about every 3 months we get into huge battles her always telling me i don care about her or her feeling even though i always ask her how her day went how the kids were
even when she is mad at me i wake get ready for work kiss her on the forehead tell her i love her and i am out the door leaving her sleeping
she is never happy and always blames me
she never asks aboput my day and when start to tell her she tells me "I don't care"
then if we argue in order for her to end the arguement she will yell i hate you and i don't think i love you i get toldd this about every 3 months
what the hell is she think help please

yes she does have life she goes to her friends about every 3rd or fourth night after i get home from work

Answer 1

I believe you need to be careful of the words you choose especially when you fight. There may be forgiveness, but it will haunt you.
Try to remember her the way you saw her when you first met. Remember the funny things that are only hers. Silly times you spent together.
Don't try to change her, you can only change yourself. maybe bend in her direction when she is upset. she might just notice you are trying. after all, the fighting doesn't seem to be working. you loved her enough to marry her. remember that. i hope she sees your efforts.

Answer 2

Sounds like she is a work at home mom, right? How many kids and ages? She is probably feeling stuck at home with the kids all day, cleaning, feeding, bathing or just plain bored out of her mind or stressed to the max. You wouldn't understand because you are out of the house at work all day. Working outside of the home and taking care of the kids and the house all day are two VERY different things. Staying at home is the hardest thing a woman can do. If she is nuts, it's because she has good reason to be. No she is probably never happy because she is MISERABLE and yes she blames you because you are not in the same sinking boat that she is in. Tell her that you know she is unhappy and ask her what you can do to help her. If she screams at you and says there is nothing you can do to help, don't stop asking.....when she feels that you are sincere in helping her she will eventually come around. good luck!

Answer 3

The real question is... How long are you going to put up with this? You need to decide if you are happy in this relationship. Tell her how you feel. And if she doesnt want to change things, I say get out. If you are having these arguments at home in the same house as your children, no matter how much you try to hide it from they, trust me they know. I hate it when people say "we are staying together for the kids" if you are not happy how can your kids be? If you are wanting to work this relationship out seek counciling. Help your wife express her feelings if not to you to someone. Compliments go a long way, next time you ask how her day was, tell her she looks nice or the house looks nice or how good she is with the kids, maybe she isnt feeling useful. Good luck

Answer 4

she sounds just like my 8 year old! when my 8 yer old is angry she yells i hate you!. As for the battles some are to be expected things don't always go smooth 100% of the time in a relationship. If things are at the point she says she dose not love you, that's more then a simple disagreements that's some real resentment talking or major immaturity. I was in a old relationship that lasted 8 years i never told him I did not love him even after we split. Tell her she's not chained down if you make her that miserable she's free to go. Don't make her feel trapped women who feel trapped in a relationship are less happy let her know you stay by choice because you love her. She is setting a very crappy example of adult behavior to the children if i were you i'ld tell her that.

Answer 5

i am a stay @ home mom with husband being the sole provider, I appreciate every day that he leaves to work for all of us. He's tended to, never having to ask for a thing. All that I want is respect for what I do. Being at home with kids has a way of kind of driving you crazy! She may be going through some depression so I would tell to make an appt. with her doc and talk to him, he might be able to help her out with some meds. The other thing hopefully is that she's not doing a little drinking behind your back? Sometimes indulging with the white bottle tends to screw with your head and emmotions make you extremley irrational. Watch very closely for all the signs. If she doesnt want to see a doctor, keep watching for your kids sake. They don't need to see you guys fight or to see her treat you badly. Then you will give them an example of how their lives will be when they're older. Sorry to hear, have her get help, and it wouldn't be bad to find some help for yourself, sometimes the best of us need a helping hand!

Answer 6

If it seems to be happening every so often and you have it down to every three months something may be wrong. I would go to counseling or to the dr. It may not be that she is unhappy with you it maybe something completely different. It's good that you still show her affection and try to talk and listen to her but it sounds like there is some deeper rooted issue.
It could be too maybe she doesn't feel appreciated. I know when my b/f works a lot and he doesn't help as much as he used to I get angry like more of a maid then a lover and friend.
You could try giving her a day off or maybe sending her to a spa for a massage most of the time you can find good deals for places just opening but it may help.
But also don't forget their maybe another issue.
Good luck to your and your family.

Answer 7

I would suggest sitting down and talking together.
Have the two of you had a romantic time lately, and if not why not.
Maybe go to counsling together and get everything out in the open, Maybe she is having second thoughts on why she got married in the first place.
Honestly no matter what the reason, you can't keep a relationship going on like this forever, and somehow, someone has to take the first step and try to work things out together.
good luck

Answer 8

Sounds like you 2 need counseling before any rages break loose on a higher level. There could be a possible simple answer to all this or something more complicated.
Your wife does sound unhappy but to what degree we do not know. Do your best by her and through counseling you will find if you two should continue on or not. Good Luck to the both of you.

Answer 9

this is kindof hard to answer but when i was going through this i said all this stuff to but with out knowing how she feels i cant say what her problom is but i felt hate and never love i cant recieve love and dont no why but anyway did u talk to her about it just let her yell and get it out that might be the only way ask her if she still loves u ask what u can do to make things better talking is the only way. good luck

Answer 10

tell u what i have just the answer to ur question ok dont take it in a sarcastic way but seriously it WORKS u have to read this book men r from mars women r from Venus it sooo explains ur situation and soo many people tried it and it reallly worked
ok some small tips women loves men attention when they talk about anything u have to listen even if u dont like it u have tooooo listen to her dont give sympathy but show love and affection and never ever never NEVER wear ur Mr fix it hat and solve a problem that she has cuz mann she could do it all by herself she just needs ur affection now think of it this way a few seconds of giving her ur mind ur entire self u will see immediate results....

Answer 11

She needs help from low self esteem or depression. Ask her to get counseling maybe as a couple, and see if things can be turned around before getting out of control. Atleast you are trying to make an effort, only you can't do it by yourself. Let her know that you are only thinking about her well being & trying to keep your marriage from going in the wrong direction. (separation, divorce)