Why is my husband so irresponsible?

Question

I clearly don't understand a man's thought process! I go out of my way to make things easier on him. I can ask him to do simple things and he does not follow through half the time. Example, he has a debit card, it is too much trouble for him to write down the reciepts. I mean come on, I pay the bills and manage the entire household, and take care of the kids! All I need him to do is write them down. I have even started getting them from him every day and doing it myself, b/c by the time he does it he as about $400.00 worth of debits, not to mention the ones he has lost! It's just pure lazyiness! He does not understand the stress it puts me through.

I can ask him to take some medicine to my mom when he drops the youngest child off, and he forgets it! He forgets everything I ask him to do! I have been married 1 time before and thought that I made a better choice, but he is just driving me nuts with being so irresponsible. What should I do?

Answer 1

Perhaps something is bothering him or he has something serious on his mind (work problems??) Maybe he feels like he can't discuss his problems with you. Just ask him if everything is ok...is he happy at work?? at home?? Then let him know he's being a giblet head

Answer 2

discover an section you may bypass for a minimum of the weekend with the youngsters- relative, pal, and so on. tell him if he can no longer connect the kin, there is not any reason to be married, and leave for the entire weekend. Spend it wondering and planning on what you may do completely if he can no longer replace. he will in all probability awaken slightly and be more desirable helpful. he will slide decrease back into some old habit after a lengthy time period. Repeat. If after 2 or 3 situations, he would not stay 'more desirable helpful' for an prolonged era of time- that is time to noticeably make a spoil.

Answer 3

well i have to admit i know what you mean, when me and my husband got together i had lots of time so i handled all of the financial stuff but once we had kids and were both working i figured he needed to share some of the load so i asked him to help remind me of things and let me know when he spent money so i could make sure we kept our bank books up. Well lets just say that didn't go very well.. So i realized i had to start small so i made up a basic chart of when things were do and about how much spending money we had a month, so i went out and bought a bulletin board and put it up there and told him i knew he was busy so that was a reminder for both of us and we also agreed that if he would pin his receipts up there then i would remember to get them down.. That worked GREAT for us and before i knew it we were reminding each other of when things we due and he makes sure he puts all of his receipts up there..He even started spending less because he say how much we had left. Good luck!!!

Answer 4

Hi is not responsible for one reason and one reason only. He is a MAN. There aren't any responsible ones, and you aren't his Mama. Stop doing things for him, let him bounce a couple of checks, what the h e l l. Better yet, take away the freaking debit card, cut it up, and deny to your death that you know what happened to it. "You must have lost it honey, oh well, here's a nice checkbook". Make sure it is one of those carbon copy ones. Dont make his life any easier when he is not doing the same for you. All men are sloppy crybabies in big hairy lets-try-to-be-macho bodies. Stop stressing over this and put an end to it, be mean and harsh and have a dont-give-a-crap attitude. I would love to tell you that someday he'll grow up but lets face it honey, if it hasn't happened yet.............................

Answer 5

You could seriously have worse problems, I always say if you want something done right do it yourself. As for the debit receipts put a basket or small box somewhere out in the open and have him just put all of his receipts in there so you can subtract them. It might work , if not just get online banking at the end of the day you will be able to see everything that you and him spent using the debit card. I f your bank does not offer it i would suggest going to a bank that does.....

Answer 6

I can definitly relate to your story, exept mine husband doesn't drop the kids off anywhere... I do all that.
Try turning the tables on him...(this worked for me, even though I receive the receipts every two days now, but it's alot better than at the end of the week.) "Forget" to do his laundry, or pick up after him...this drove ME crazy, but it got HIS attention. Just think of it this way...it's the little things that will drive him crazy, too. :)

Answer 7

Don't ever expect your husband to be responsible its just not possible (in some occasions). I think you should let him know you are seriously upset about this he does need to make an effort to change. Good Luck!

Answer 8

Unless you are willing to risk getting him his own account for him to be accountable then stop complaining. That would be the only way that he would see what his actions can cause to the monies. He would have a gigantic negative fee on his account and wonder what & how it got there, then he would go out his way not to do this again after the hardship of getting it straighten out. Besides, why would they be responsible when they have US to always pick up the peices when they mess up?

Answer 9

How about putting some post-it notes around for him to use? He can write things down and stick the note where he will see it. Or you could put little notes around to remind him. One friend of mine puts the post-it notes on her steering wheel and dash so she will see them when she runs errands.

Answer 10

Talk to him hon and tell him what you're going through. Tell him you need him to shape up and be more responsible or the marriage will never work. Communication is the key to every relationship.