Even if she has 2 already who are 13 & 17. She would have to have her tubal ligation reversed. She is 34 and her husband is 35.
My friend's husband decided that he wants more children and my friend says that she is going to have at least one more if she can to please him. She says that he is her husband and sometimes a wife has to make sacrifices to please her husband. She says that she is not looking forward to starting all back over but she will if it makes him happy. She told me this while we were taking our daily 3 mile walk and I was just quiet. She adores her husband although he has cheated in the past and has 2 children outside of their marriage to show for his infidelities. She welcomes his illegitimate children into their home and believes that his philandering days are over. I don't know and I don't care to find out. She keeps talking about this as if she wants me to agree with her but I can't, so I keep quiet. What do you think?
2006-08-23 08:39:56 · 14 answers · asked by intentionalmasterpiece 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are right to keep quiet. She needs to work it out on her own. Personally, I would never have a child just because my husband wanted me to. The wife is the one left at home taking care of the baby and who knows he may be doing this so that she will remain STUCK in the marriage while he can continue to have affairs and get other women pregnant. It could be a trick on his part to keep her there.
2006-08-23 10:17:42 · answer #1 · answered by Melm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think she is nuts for taking him back in the first place. Second, does he help with the children? Will she be the one that has to tend to it while he sits back and watches? Doesn't he have enough children? I think you should ask your friend these questions. Get her to thinking a little. Your not doing anything wrong by asking, but if you tell her, she may get mad. If she is dumb enough to do this, then go ahead. I think the only reason she wants to do it so he will not cheat and have children everywhere else. But that is not going to stop him. I am sure he is still doing it. It's her life and she is going to do what she wants no matter what anyone says. But I would be these questions in her mind. Good luck.
2006-08-23 15:59:31 · answer #2 · answered by Xena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that she shouldn't do all that to have a child that she doesn't want.
He wants another kid but she would have to get her tubal ligation reversed for a kid that only her husband wants.
The decision on having children should be a two way street and she shouldn't put herself in a position where she is doing all this stuff just to please her husband who has cheated on her.
She is a foolish woman who is allowing herself to destruct at the hands of a man. She shouldn't even be with him after his affairs, unprotected and leading to children at that! You don't have to agree with her and instead you should just be open and honest with her. Let her know that you don't think she should have to have another kid to please him.
And that, if anything, he should be doing things to please her after all the pain I'm sure he has put on her shoulders.
She doesn't need to have another kid, especially when her 17 year old will probably be having kids soon (4-5 years guess).
2006-08-23 16:29:48 · answer #3 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason, your friend is a glutton for punishment. When you care about somebody and you see that she is her own worst enemy, you just want to scream and tell her she's an idiot....and shake some sense into her.
Since she's sharing this information with you, you can offer your feedback and tell her you want the best for her. If she's open to the dialogue, then continue to share your feelings. If she tries to shut you out, then back off. When all comes crashing down on her and she's dumped with three kids.....well, it's up to you if you can tolerate being there for her when she's trying to pick up the pieces of the mess she made for herself.
2006-08-23 15:52:41 · answer #4 · answered by srhonda61 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children are something you BOTH need to 100% agree on. It is NOT something you do to keep the other person happy. Your friend is a fool if she gives in to her husband like that. He can't respect her because if he did, he would have not pushed the issue.
2006-08-23 17:29:39 · answer #5 · answered by Elvendra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. The infidelity thing is the kicker.
I'd tell her when the 13 yo reaches 18 to file for divorce and boot his sorry *** out of the house.
2006-08-23 15:56:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you dont want to discuss this anymore. Then change the subject. If she wants to be a doormat for her husband, then let her. Why anyone would have a child to please their cheating husband is beyond me. You might want to suggest she get tested for STDs and HIV though.
2006-08-23 15:45:39 · answer #7 · answered by Stewiesgal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This planet needs more poeple like a drowning man needs a glass of water.
2006-08-24 22:36:07 · answer #8 · answered by Phil S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ONLY request that should MOVE any woman in that position is what she will need to sustain a creature bought into existence and LOVE ain't it ... When HE DOES THE DONALD TRUMP THING ...mONEY tALKS bUTSHIT WALKS...
2006-08-23 15:52:01 · answer #9 · answered by e.t. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't always have to agree with your friends. I personally think they should have talked about kids before they got married. If she's not 100% comfortable with it she shouldn't do it.
2006-08-23 15:49:56 · answer #10 · answered by musiclover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋