A couple ,three times a year out of the blue(at least I don't see it coming)hellacious ,kaos scourches the portion of the earth I inhabit. 98% of the time it's over some sort of unjustified jealousy issue. Usually takes several days( and a lot of asprin) before I am able to calm her down and convince her she had nothing to be pissed about.The damage left behind (for me anyway) is pretty extreme. In fact I really don't get over it as much as I just try to put it behind me. Once things blow over, I am left with the impression that she somehow feels I am responsible for these episodes and so owe her something. Granted I do get angry(pissed beyond belief,furious in fact), but after the 20th time I am past even feeling sorry about getting pissed off. These things are ugly enough as they are ,when they end I'd like them to END and not have to do the sorry dear thing she expects me to do . Any suggestions to bring a swift and complete end to this type of thing or even better avoid it ?
2006-08-23 06:56:56 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
In fairness I have to say(these episodes aside) she is pretty cool.
2006-08-23 07:10:45 · update #1
As a woman who sometimes does the freaking out I have to say it could be several things causing the problem. Is she on any form of birth control? I was on the patch and all those hormones made me INSANE! Almost caused us to get a divorce in fact. You should talk to her during one of her good moments and see if you can get to the bottom of the situation and also see if she'll go get her hormone levels checked. Just be prepared for her to get defensive to begin with.
Good luck!
2006-08-23 07:08:30 · answer #1 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things just dont come out of the blue. Men want to say that but its not true. It might be unjustified jealousy for you but I'm sure its a totally different experience for her. What are you doing that is causing her to be jealous ?? Or maybe its that your not paying enough attention to her. You can avoid it by not doing things you shouldn't be and you guys can try to work on your communication so it doesn't have to take the route its taking.
2006-08-23 07:06:07 · answer #2 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,I don't know the entire situation,and it seems to me that all men think their women "freak out on them"any time she doesn't agree with what they say or do and get emotional about it.But try asking her to write how she's feeling in a letter so you can really get a feel of how she is feeling without the emotional uproar.This way she'll be able to calm down with a pen in her hand and feel like she's really gotten her opinion out.I wish my man would give me this psycho babble when I get crazy.It would probably work!
2006-08-23 07:03:57 · answer #3 · answered by jayne s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I started taking birth control I was like that... STAY CALM WHEN SHE'S LIKE THIS! Ask her what she wants/needs of you in that moment and don't dare say she's overreacting.... I can usually be settled with a hug.... or he'll leave the room and give me a few hours to realize that i'm being a *****...... I eventually calm down.... I once threw a godzilla size fit because he told me to make myself an eggroll... and in all reality I don't even know I was so p*ssed.... check her birth control. And if she's not on bc, it might be a build up of times you've pis*ed her off and don't know about.... all that build up and whosh! Mt. St. Bit*h. Wash dishes more:-) <---that's my answer to all guys problems:-)
2006-08-23 07:18:53 · answer #4 · answered by rachael 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, they think we are mind readers. There is no hope. I have had 10 girlfriend and 1 wife (whch I went with or was married to for at least 2 years) and they all are the same. Not that I find similar women, just they are all just that women. We will never understand them. Just love them inspite of themselves. The other day, mine got mad at me. Here is how it went down...
After I cooked dinner, I told her, "I will do the dishes." She said, "No, I got it." So, I go and kick back on the sofa and talk with her boy. She comes in and we talk, and I said," Baby, are you sure you don't want me to do the dishes?" She says, " No, I will get them later."
So, later, we decide to watch a movie. She get up to do the dishes. After, she walks out and goes by the pool and just sits there. I go to find out what happened. She is mad because I didn't help.
I was like,'Wait, I told you I would do them...then I asked you again if you wanted me to do them. You said no and now you are mad?"
She said, "You could have helped with the table."
Love them, my boy. It gets hard at times like that, but hey we have to be the soother, also. They have the goods! and make up sex is great.
2006-08-23 07:08:25 · answer #5 · answered by Richard B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to seriously talk to her and let her know that's not how you want to live the rest of your life!One thing is to get jealous but to throw a tantrum is something completely different. What your doing wrong is sticking around, if you warn that your not putting up with it and she'll need to deal with her angry differently otherwise your leaving, she'll have no other choice. You're ALLOWING her to behave this way. No matter what happened between the both of you that's no way to live the rest of your life, is it? I wouldn't want to live out my life worried that a tantrum was bound to happened because of some wrong move! I don't think so. Sorry babe but you got to change or I got to go!
2006-08-23 07:08:36 · answer #6 · answered by Nikie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she has some kind of hormonal imbalance.My bosses wife does him the same way and she has to take some kind of medication.She doesn't take it half the time so she still goes into her "rages". This seemed kinda funny to me when I was reading your question because it sounds just like the problems my boss has been having.I feel for you cause I know it makes a nervous wreck out of him.Seriously she needs to see a Dr but I know you will have trouble talking her into it.Like you say she thinks it's your fault.Maybe if she has a sister or someone who could help you convince her to go.I wish you luck and if all else fails maybe you just need to get out of the marriage.I hate to say that but life is too short to spend miserable.Good luck!!
2006-08-23 07:05:56 · answer #7 · answered by j_911_rhoads 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife has serious issues she is not sharing with you. Get her issues out on the table for discussion or tell her you feel like you need to go and give her something to be jealous about, if you going to get blamed anyway. You don't have to take bullying ugly scenes from anybody especially from the wife.
2006-08-23 07:14:55 · answer #8 · answered by N e 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have u ever thought that maybe she is cheating on u. Maybe with someone that comes and goes and she is doing this because she is somehow unsatisfied in ur relationship and she compares u to him and doesn't like what she sees. When a person feels insecure and lacking they usually feel guilty and therefore she accuses u of cheating and is very jealous.
2006-08-23 07:03:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
women don't just freak out for no reason unless they're sadistic. so if she's sadistic then leave her if she's not then ask yourself "what are doing to get her this mad?". maybe you don't communicate well with her or maybe you're guilty of something that you won't admit to yourself or a million other things that we don't know about. take a step back and evaluate the situation and see if it's even worth it to be in this relationship. sometimes it's best to leave than live a life of pure hell.
2006-08-23 07:13:35 · answer #10 · answered by mimi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋