Even my parents dont think he is right for me, do parents know everything? I know i do about the safetly and well being of my daughter. We were getting married but i cancelled it as he was drinking far too much, then he hit me and the police were involved, i forgave him and we tried again, then i went out woth the girls and gave my number out - i know dumb!! and then he still keeps drinking, and changing his mind all the time. We were selling our house to buy a bigger one which we got(not in yet) a and letting ours out and now he is messing with other peoples lives aswell as mine, and to top it off my daughter said 'daddy was asleep' when i had gone out with my friends,
2006-08-23 03:17:29 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i was in your position not that long ago my husband drank alot and often got violent and he was always mentally abusive when he had a drink,i would come home from work in the evening and find him passed out on the sofa,they were dark days.one day i told him that i knew he had another love in his life and i was going too leave when he asked me who she was coz he didnt know i showed him the empty bottles i had retrived from the bin and said you spend more time with here than you do me.the sight of 7 vodka bottles and 24 tins of beer that i had saved all week was enough to shock him into seeking help he still drinks but its not as much and now i got the control back and my self esteem
2006-08-23 03:35:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ditch him and get on with your life with your daughter. Sounds a little like my ex. I had the violence and the police involvement and thought my heart would break when they escorted him out of the house after one of his benders.
Took me 4 years to finally accept I was flogging a dead horse in trying to make it work. I still love him, but as a very dear friend.
We get on fine whilst we are not together, I do genuinely care about him and want the best for him. Im nearly 2 years on now, and the kids are happier, I have had some very rough times with the ex in those 2 years, but things seem to have settled down now. I am happier too, because I dont have the added strain of worrying about his reactions to situations any more.
I hope it works out for you, I know how hard it can be, but you have to be on your own - sont rush into something with someone else, it would be a recipe for disaster. Im still single and happy and dont assume that a man will make everything right in my life!
Good luck hon.
2006-08-23 03:29:46 · answer #2 · answered by Moi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are lucky that you are strong and know this man isn't right for you. Eventually it will become too much and you will end it. you know in your heart that you're not going to stay with this guy forever, it's just a matter of time before it will be over. During that time he will piss you off more and more but you will grow stronger and stronger. His behaviour makes you love him less and less right? Make a list of all his bad points and good points and give the list to him to prove himself to you in a certain amount of time. Tell him you will leave him if he doesn't mend his ways, because you deserve better.
2006-08-23 03:26:38 · answer #3 · answered by favershambles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the hell out of there as fast as you can. You start by saying you know about the safety and well being of your daughter then contradict it with everything you type afterwards. Do yourself and more importantly your daughter a favour and get away from him. If he loves you he will clean up his act and then you can start over. If not then you are well rid of him. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear but i believe its what you NEED to hear
2006-08-23 03:27:49 · answer #4 · answered by Mozzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you giving your love to someone who doesn't deserve it.A man that can hit you for whatever reason doesn't love you!
I have been in an abusive relationship myself so I know how much pain it causes. You need to find the strength for yourself and your daughter to leave now. You can't save him he doesn't want to be saved. Believe me when I say your whole life is out there waiting for you. Be strong and the rest will follow.
2006-08-23 03:40:06 · answer #5 · answered by Queen D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you mad??? Get rid of him!!! Makes no difference if you love him he's an idiot and your putting your daughters safety at risk. Lose him, im sure you can do better. It'll be crap for the first couple of months and you'll be tempted to take him back but it does get easier and the time will come when you think what the f**k was I doing!!! Leave him!!!!!
2006-08-23 03:24:36 · answer #6 · answered by cheryl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
parents do have a funny way of knowing these things. its easy to say get out get rid of him when he has hit you or abusive.. but when you love them its easy to make excuses for them or justify it. sadly it is harder to leave someone you love than it is someone you dont. but damage has been done. and I am afraid he wont change. but you just got to realise that yourself. and then do it. but you got a daughter to think about because you probably know she will pick all this up and will suffer. mums are there to protect their kids even if is from their fathers.
2006-08-23 03:51:10 · answer #7 · answered by sweetsunbear77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation. The best thing to do is leave while you can. Just remeber you love him but love yourself more than you love anyone, he will do to you, what you alow him to do.
He might change one he see you are serious and ready to give up. You know the saying you dont know a good thing until its gone. Good luck I know it is hard to let go.
2006-08-23 03:25:58 · answer #8 · answered by dark_tallangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now. They never change. Who is more important? It took me 7 years to get out, and i have never looked back. Demon drink will fuel the fire. Imagine what can happen next time you go out and he falls asleep in drink. You know the answer. Good luck!
2006-08-23 03:41:35 · answer #9 · answered by daria 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would leave him. You will get over it sooner than you think. It is better that you realized that now than later, so take advantage of the realization factor and let him go now or else you will be unhappy for the rest of your life. Settle for the best not less.
2006-08-23 03:28:02 · answer #10 · answered by preferablyyoung 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋