Ok, I just want to know how many women out there were or are like this during pregnancy. I am very patient and I try to be understanding and I do not complain to her about the lack of sex, but at the same time it kind of subconciously makes me feel a little worthless, as if it has something to do with me, which I know it doesn't. I know it has a lot to do with the pains of pregnancy...back, stomach, etc, etc. and she has also told me that she feels totally and completely unsexy with her 4 month belly.
2006-08-23 01:47:48 · 20 answers · asked by NiceGuy27 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
When I was pregnant I didnt have a sex drive to. I hated it for my husband but he stood by me. Later in pregnancy around 7 months my sex drive kicked in and I was able to be there for my husband. After the baby was born my drive has disappeared. I cant explain exactly why but I hate that I cant be there for my husband. I know it is hard on him.
It is natural for you to feel this way. Any person would. It is her and how her hormones are reacting. Talk with her. maybe she can say things to make you feel more desirable. Build up your ego.
Hope this helps. Good luck to you all and the baby.
2006-08-23 01:54:11 · answer #1 · answered by Keith Perry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry, but lmao! if she feels unsexy at 4 months, just wait till 7, 8 and 9! We all go through it. For me, it's 7 going on 8 times.
Best idea- Set up a spa day for her (maybe include her mum or sis) so she can get pampered from head to toe. Take her out to dinner and talk all about the baby, planning the nursery, how much she means to you and how amazing she is. Hug and kiss her as often as you can. Get her used to your seeing her growing belly. That baby hears what's going on outside. The more you talk to him/her now, the more calm the babe will be when it is born and hears your voice.
When you're wife needs to know she's still beautiful, though she feels like a turtle or a bus, you have to do more than the usual to initiate intimacy. Loads of love, affection and touching may help you get where you want to go.
2006-08-23 01:57:24 · answer #2 · answered by auld mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your girl is experiencing a very big thing that is changing her life dramatically - there's a lot for her to deal with. The first three months were probably full of shock, exhaustion and nausea. She's also thinking about what it means to her life, her body.
It's all really big stuff and you don't seem to get that and you are being incredibly selfish.
Some women do keep having sex throughout their pregnancy - but others can be so overwhelmed by the experience that they lose interest. She's just starting her middle trimester when she should be feeling more energetic and calmer....so it may be that she'll show more interest. But ultimately you can't push the issue - she needs your support and you need to understand that she's growing a baby and dealing with life changes.
2006-08-23 02:08:18 · answer #3 · answered by Sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now this just may be part of her changing body. When I was 4 months pregnant, I felt like I was fat... once I started showing, and my husband told me how beautiful I was every single day, numerous times a day, I started to feel sexy again.... By the end of the pregnancy I was horny all of the time.... numerous times a day.
Your job as her husband and as a man wanting sex is to make her feel sexy and beautiful. All pregnant women have a "glow" about them, and it is a wonderful thing. Nuture it, and allow your wife to change from feeling "fat" to feeling the glow and tell her that you think she is the most beautiful woman in the world, since she is carrying your baby.
Society teaches us that fat is not beautiful....... which is wrong. But........ your job as the father of the baby and the husband of your wife is to assure her that the has never been more beautiful then she is right now.
The hormones will kick in, if you handle it right and you will be having more sex then you ever thought possible. My husband was almost running from me towards the end of my pregnancy (twice) since I was a hormonal horny chick all the time.
Do your part and make her feel sexy - then enjoy it.
Good luck.... and congrads on the baby.
Terri
2006-08-23 01:56:39 · answer #4 · answered by Night Train 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relax, it's not your fault. I'm 6 months preg. and my BF feels the same way. Its hard to feel sexy when you can barely see your own feet or move in ways that used to be easy. It has nothing to do with you, just remember, we are a 24/7 oven with a baby inside. There's always a pain somewhere or an uncomfterable pressure. Try pampering her with a back or foot rub to make the pain less noticable and then work on seducing. Good luck Oh yea, don't forget to keep reminding her she's beautiful!! We like that even if we do say you're lying! :-)
2006-08-23 06:34:29 · answer #5 · answered by SAMANTHA M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's pretty normal that she's not wanting sex. However, it may stay this way for a while which is understandably hard on you physically and emotionally. It;s great that you're not complainging to her but it's probably important that you talk to her about how you're feeling so it doesn't become something that causes resentment between the two of you. Marriages suffer from the stress of pregnancy and childbirth so it's important that you guys work together to reduce that stress as much as possible! Talk about it. It's the best solution, corny as it sounds! Good luck with your wife and your new baby!
2006-08-23 01:55:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may start feeling better soon. A lot of women regain their sex drive towards the middle of pregnancy.
Try to do stuff to make her feel better and let her know you love her and that she's beautiful. BUT don't don't it with the expectation that you're gonna get laid! Do it because you wanna make your wife feel better and because you want her to know how much you love her
Rub her feet or her back. Send her to get a prenatal massage. Go to appointments with her and be involved in learning about pregnancy and birth and prepare to support her through labor. Help her out around the house. If you go to the kitchen, ask her if she needs a snack since she's probably hungry a lot. If she is weak or nausous in the mornings when she wakes, bring her a snack before she even gets out of bed. Tell her how beautiful she is to you with the baby growing inside her. Tell her how amazing you think she is!
2006-08-23 01:55:33 · answer #7 · answered by momma2mingbu 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, yes, all of those symptoms are uncomfortable, and feeling unsexy is very true...but despite that, during pregnancy I had never in my life felt so damn horny!!! My husband was the one who needed to adjust to the whole pregnancy sex thing, and it was the most frustrating phase I had to go through, so I know how u feel. Every woman is different I guess. Pregnancy consists of lots of sacrifces!!!
2006-08-23 03:00:06 · answer #8 · answered by Julie G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep being patient. Remember - you have NO idea what your wife is going through or feeling. There are other ways to meet your needs for a few more months.
The last thing she needs to worry about right now is you getting mad and frustrated over sex..
ps - I wouldn't expect it to end immediately after the baby comes. Y'all will have a whole new set of distractions.
2006-08-23 08:01:53 · answer #9 · answered by Mom of 4 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to make her feel sexy. When I was preggers I had a huge sexual appitite and my partner made me feel like a godess. There is something amazingly naturally sexy about a pregnant woman and you need to make sure she knows this!
You will need to make allowances for the way she is feeling but the tiredness and that should be wearing of by now.
Enjoy your time left just as a couple, have a nice night with low lights, a saucy film if thats your thing and massage her to relax her. Don't shy away from her tummy, pat it and hold it to make her know you aren't put of by it.
Good luck!
2006-08-23 02:02:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋