2006-08-22 21:36:12 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Give Them Enough time to bring out that Feeling
2006-08-22 21:40:03 · answer #1 · answered by Momomada 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Read the book, "Men are Clams, Women are Crowbars." It's funny. It talks about how men and women have different conversational styles and problem-solving processes. It helps you appreciate that some people seem to be holding back their feelings when, in fact, they are just expressing them in ways that are different from you. You really can have a relationship with those people, but the harder you pry, the further they go in their shells.
Although I'm female, in my marriage, I'm the clam, and my husband is the crowbar. And I'm VERY GRATEFUL that he has been willing to take the time and energy to understand me. I trust him more and more each day with my feelings, and we're both very very blessed by the process. If he hadn't taken the time, I probably would never have opened up to anyone.
So, I would say, give them space. As long as you can stand it.
2006-08-22 21:49:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hug them, be patient and not pressure them. Let them know you're there, but don't force them to bare their soul. Some people need to mull things over so they truly understrand themselves before they are ready to verbalise their innermost thoughts and feelings.
We're all different. Just because you might want to talk about things, it doesn't mean everyone else has to. It doesn't mean they're not happy with you, or that they don't trust you.
I am usually very communicative, but on occassions, I just like to have time and space to get my head around something before I want to talk about it. There's nothing more irritating than having somebody - however well-meaning - banging on at you while you're trying to think.... For example, try saying the alphabet backwards while reading the following...
"There's something wrong, isn't there? I know there is... C'mon, tell me...I can help... It's not good to bottle things up...fine, be like that, you're so childish... I'm not going to stop asking, you know, you might as well just tell me...There is something wrong, I know when you're upset..."
See what I mean?
2006-08-22 21:46:11 · answer #3 · answered by lickintonight 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are u sure they are holding back their feelings? are u sure they have feelings? I don't think that something in this world can make someone hide their feelings...think about it, maybe there are no feelings to hold back after-all...
2006-08-22 21:52:01 · answer #4 · answered by Aniuk . 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly I wouldn't put them under a whole load of pressure to do so. Someone will only let their feelings out when they are comfortable and relaxed enough to do so. Don't be intimdating.
2006-08-22 21:41:18 · answer #5 · answered by amzalama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should talk to them, not interigate them, sometimes action speaks louder that words. Sometimes you might hit a brick wall, and feel very insecure, give it time, maybe he is afraid to show his true feelings does not want to get hurt. If you are calm give it time but don't give up. good luck
2006-08-22 22:44:39 · answer #6 · answered by Ruksana P 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try n talk it out....but if he/she still holds it back, then i'll give them time to get comfy with their own feelings before trying to confide n me !!
2006-08-22 21:40:16 · answer #7 · answered by Nisha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tricky one, I know everyone says talk to them but it is the tried and tested answer. Completely depends on your situation, not much help I know, sorry.
2006-08-22 21:39:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give them the feeling of privacy and convince them to believe you then they will share there feelings with you.
2006-08-22 21:40:09 · answer #9 · answered by ssmindia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um well i would say talk 2 them but by the sounds of it you have already tried. i think the only thing you can do is try again! i no its not much help sorry!
2006-08-22 21:41:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋