Am I out of line to tell another nurse she needs her husband to work?

Question

I am a RN in a hospital and have noticed a trend where 3 of my co workers husbands do not work. They call themselves stay at home dads. These girls are tired, misreable and their husbands are just freaking lazy. One of them works nite shift and her husband golfs in the day time and she has to stay awake until he gets home to take care of the kids. She comes to work exhausted and suffering from lack of sleep. The other one is trying to breast feed an infant and work nites while her husband claims he cannot get a job. I am afraid out of exhaustion these girls are going to make a mistake at work. I feel obliged to tell them I do not feel safe working with them unless they are getting proper rest, so their husband needs to get jobs. What do you think?

I cannot mind my own business when my patients are being taken care of by these exhausted women.

Maybe I should just tell them I am noticing they are not getting enough rest. One of their husbands is a school teacher and claims he cant find work. What a crock! dont we have a teacher shortage?

I didnt say I was going to tell them their husbands are lazy bums. I just think it is time they quit putting so much pressure on themselves.

Answer 1

I say mind your business and thank your lucky stars that you are not married to one of the deadbeats.

Answer 2

I don't think you have the right to try to dictate how other people manage their personal lives. Whether or not their spouses work is irrelevant.

What's relevant is you believe that these nurses are possibly compromising their patients' safety. This is an issue that I would bring up with a supervisor. Even then, a supervisor wouldn't have the right to tell these women to make their husbands get jobs, only that they need to be more aware of what's going on while they are at work.

Telling a coworker that her husband is lazy and needs to get a job sounds like a great way to make an enemy.

Answer 3

It's your obligation as a nurse to lookout for the safe care and well being of patients. You may not be able to dictate what happens in their homes and relationships...but you can certainly go to the director of nursing or dept supervisor. These nurses could be every bit as much of a danger to patients as a nurse who would be drunk or high. Good luck. I know it's a tough call when it's people you work with and care about...but you entered the nursing field to help patients not endanger them.

Answer 4

It is out of line and may be illegal if you are in some supervisory position to these women. As a female, I am the breadwinner, and there were rough times, but I am glad we arranged our lives this way, it has turned out quite well.

How is this any different than a young unmarried woman who parties then comes to work? They would be tired also.

MYOB.