My girlfriend soon to be fiance' hates porn or nuditiy of any kind on movies?

Question

when ever we watch a movie and there is any kind of nuditiy she gets pissed and wants to turn it off. she hates porn.will not watch.
she constanly searches though the computer to see if ive looked at any porn.

Answer 1

So ask yourself..
can you live with that?
cause if you dont think you can it will only get worse....

It may hurt to lose her, but it will hurt more to divorce her, or have her nag and watch you and sneek...

Answer 2

Not liking porn I can understand. Some women don't care about it, and even enjoy viewing it with their significant others. Others (like myself) are made uncomfortable by it. It makes us worry that maybe we're not completely satisfying our boyfriends, or worry that we're not sexually attractive enough. This is kinda normal.

However, your girlfriend's refusal of even nudity in normal movies speaks of some deep-seated problem that's well past normal insecurity. I don't know anything about her, but this screams "major trust issues".

My honest advice is to talk to her. Have a conversation and tell her how you feel about this, and try to find out why she's so freaked out by nudity. And then, after you hear her explanation, I'd suggest couples or individual counseling for her. It might go over really well to tell her that you'll do it together, so she won't feel like she's alone.

Whatever you do, DO NOT marry this girl before this issue is settled. If you don't handle this first, you may end up dealing with problems down the line that could break your marriage. It's much easier to figure out now whether she's really the one than it is to get a divorce later.

Best of luck.

Answer 3

On one hand, it is perfectly alright for someone to not like nudity or porn and you just need to decide if someone who doesn't like those things and appears intolerant of them will truly be compatible with you. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. On the other hand, it sounds like she has some control and security issues. You don't give a whole lot of information so it is hard to tell if she has a valid reason for "constantly" searching thru your computer or not. But if she is getting upset and being suspicious without any reason you might want to think twice about proposing to her. Doesn't sound like a pleasant way to live.

Answer 4

Hmmm, minor bunny boiler alert if she searches through the computer. Porn is not everyones thing, but I always get nervy if someone has this bad a reaction to anything. Perhaps she used to be a porn actress and is terrified of being found out. I think you need to talk to her about it, find out what the real issue is, especially if you like it. No good waiting until you are married!

Answer 5

i hear that its either paranoia...dant dant.. its comming to getcha u know the song? hah jk. but seriously might be a moral issue for some pple that its very wrong but otherwise maybe sit dwn wth her ask what offends her soo much about it? and mi gosh she trust u to some degree there sounds like a serious issue u might need to go to counseling togather b4 u get married wether or not there is a real problem bec at least ull have some coping techniques u can be taught sigh.. really sounds weird get some help... and tell her u love her very much but that there are some bounderies. good luck hon.

Answer 6

Is she your girlfriend or is she your mother?

If that sort of control works for you... and you love her enough to marry her...

BUT, and this is a big but, if this is bothering you (and you posting the question here seems to indicate it is) may I suggest you resolve this issue BEFORE you propose.

I know my husband would never give up porn..... and I wouldn't expect him to. I don't think it hurts a thing. But your not talking just about porn.... you say she is intollerant of ANY nudity, right?

Besides, I'm not his boss. I'm his partner.

Maybe she just feels insecure about her own body or your fidelity. Talk to her about WHY she has these objections to nudity.

Answer 7

Some people can't handle seeing naked people or other people having sex. It might have something to do with her upbringing. If you really enjoy these things and she isn't willing to change her way of thinking than I suggest you do. People who get married and give up things they really like to do or see in your case, resents the other person later. Talk to her and ask her why she is so afraid to watch these movies with you. If she can't give you an honest answer, maybe she isn't the right one for you or you for her. Good luck.

Answer 8

she feels threatened. i get the same way..... she feels like you are looking at other women. if you truely love her, then accept that and don't look at porn. if it's something you cant do, then maybe you should choose someone else to be with. it also might be a phase. you could just let it pass. also, tell her how you feel. communication is always good in a relationship.

Answer 9

Insecurity is the main reason. They think we compare them both. Some how we will get the hot porn girls number and meet her for drinks or something. Some girls just dont like it though, My wife laughs her head off saying how cheesy it is.

Answer 10

'constanly searches though the computer to see if ive looked at any porn'

That's not good. You need some sort of trust. Has she caught you looking at some, or is her fear unfounded?

Answer 11

She may be uncomfortable and insecure with SEX period. You should discuss this issue A LOT with her! Better make sure you are sexually compatible in ALL areas before you take the next step to "fiance".