I'm thinking of all the times I see the "you must be gay yourself" reply to homophobic louts here. I am also thinking of comments made about Tony Stewart (who I don't think is a jerk) at http://www.gaytona.com, a website for gay and bi male NASCAR fans.
Do you mean it when you say those things?
And would you really *want* a guy you consider a jerk to come out as gay or bi?
I'm a bi female; that kind of response seems like a guy thing to me.
2006-08-22 11:33:01 · 13 answers · asked by GreenEyedLilo 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I think using that response has become so common that it's now the standard retort. However, I *do* believe in many cases those who are viciously persistent in their obvious hate-filled attacks, and those who are maniacal in their so-called "good Xtian" attempts to convert us are indeed repressing their innate homosexual orientation...although it's often difficult to separate the two groups.
Others who are merely jerks are just that.
Best Wishes!
"I try to view all people as equals and give them all due respect by assuming everyone is Gay until I'm told otherwise." ~~Me
2006-08-22 14:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by Specious λ Neurotica 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't want someone who comes off as a jerk and homophobic attached to the community but I think the belief that it's the case actually stems from the popular examples the media throws out there. Ya know, the mayors that are throwing out the homophobic legislation and then hiring gay interns for sexual purposes or having gay relations on the side. When you see something like that on the tele you kind of start believing it; then again some of us were being the jerks when we were younger and think that some of these guys are now at that stage (chris from Real World Chicago pops into mind). I personally believe that a lot of this is taught and straight men are into the believing what they've seen portrayed on television too of how it's alright to make terrible remarks and use the ones that they've heard all of their childhoods...
2006-08-22 19:18:32 · answer #2 · answered by laydlo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
part of it is like the old saying
"the squeaky wheel gets the grease". Some closet cases have developed extreme homophobic tendencies due to bad conditioning in the early years....
but also, relying upon this belief provides an escape valve, a sort of coping mechanism, to the rejected gay man who has feelings for a straight homophobe and is no longer in said homophobe's good graces..."Oh he wants to be gay too and is just repressing it"- that is the standard stock response to fall back on.
It certainly helped me get over my crush, on a determinedly straight boy. The logic of picturing him as a closet case who will get his heart broken in a gay awakening by a much crueler future boy friend...certainly was cathartic, to say the least.
2006-08-22 20:00:40 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Fancy Pants 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
The best way to stop homophobic people and ignorant people, is to not be ignorant yourself.
But some people are that insecure with their sexuality that they're homophobic, I kind've pity them actually.
If people say stuff about my sexuality I just tell them they're not mature enough to understand that people are people, people will do things you don't like, and you that they should get over it because I don't want to deal with their crap.
Another good way is just to ignore them.
Saying they have repressed sexuality or whatever, is just a stupid comeback that makes you almost as bad as them.
2006-08-23 17:16:02 · answer #4 · answered by Adam G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mostly I think it's just a way to be getting back at them, don't you think? Beacuse if someone is bothering another person by saying they're gay, what would the best come-back be? Well, telling the offender he/she is gay.
But on the other side, of course it could also mean they have trouble with their sexuality in terms that they are afraid of the unknown, be it if they have low self steem, et cetera.
2006-08-22 18:38:00 · answer #5 · answered by Aeroplane 1 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Well if a straight guy gets so bent out of shape over what gay/bi males do on their own time, you have to wonder.
2006-08-22 18:35:53 · answer #6 · answered by i luv teh fishes 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It makes as much sense as saying someone who makes racist jokes about Asians must be Asian. People rail against certain groups because they exhibit some quality that they don't like, simple as that, and whether that's also something in themselves they don't like is neither here nor there. There's a myth that every guy comfortable with his sexuality wouldn't be bothered by gay men, but if you think about it for a minute, it doesn't hold water.
2006-08-22 18:46:39 · answer #7 · answered by Will 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I think there is general confusion as to why a str8 guy would spend so much time thinking about what gay guys get up to.
2006-08-22 18:35:58 · answer #8 · answered by n2mustaches 4 · 6⤊ 0⤋
It's meant as a joke 9 times out of 10 so I wouldn't try to read too much into it :-)
2006-08-22 19:16:17 · answer #9 · answered by God 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best defense is a strong offense. If you have a weak defense of being queer then you call them a bigot , narrow minded or queer to shift them from offending you to defending them self .
2006-08-23 00:24:11 · answer #10 · answered by Thomas H 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋