problem with my friend! please help ASAP!!?

Question

i have this friend, and she used to be really nice, but now she has been really mean. she makes fun of me, calls me a loser and says i'm mean and she calls me a prep wannabe. shes always really nice to me in the morning on the bus but then later in the day she is mean. at first i just ignored it but it got worse. i tried talking to her about it but she wouldn't take me seriously. i've tried not talking to her at all, but that doesn't work either. and i know that if i try to do the same thing back to her she will take it personally and cry about it. and all my friends are always hanging out with her and she doesn't include me. and she is always taking advantage of me. if i let her borrow something from me like a pen or pencil, she doesn't give it back. and she says i can't dance and that i have not talent. i need advice on what to do in this situation. i feel like i'm trapped. what should i do?

Answer 1

Ask to talk with her again. Tell her how you feel, and see how she responds. If she seems to care about the friendship and wants to work things out, give it a try.

If she doesn't take your feelings seriously, break up with her as a friend and search out new friends.

Answer 2

Did you ever see Mean Girls? It's the movie that's actually from a book written by a psychologist to help parents understand the catty world of girls in highschool. One of the things it talks about are the humiliating and demaning "games" girls play against each other to tear each other down. What she is doing is an example of that. She is acting no worse than any other kind of bully. She is not treating you with any of the respect a friend gives. Let her know you are not scared of her, standing up to a bully is hard but often they will back down becasue underneath it all- they are scared too. You will need to start being friends with other people. It may be very hard at first but more than worth it in the end. True friends are hard to find. It's easy to hang out with someone who you have things in common with and mistake that for friendship, that's really more of an aquaintance or someone you are social with. Friends make you feel good about who you are.

Answer 3

Guys are different that girls. Girls will call someone that is not nice to them anymore a friend and a guy will beat up the other guy for turning into a jerk.

After highschool you will laugh when you look back and see how much all this type of stuff just soooooooo doesn't matter. Most people don't even know the people they went to Junior High with... study hard and then you can laugh at her when you are rich with a good education and she married to a bum and working two jobs while you enjoy life.

Answer 4

It sounds like your friend is having self esteem problems. The best way to deal with something like that is either to let her know outright that she's hurting your feelings, like, "That wasn't nice," or, "Why would you say that?" Or, you can ask an open-ended question like, "How would you feel if I said that to you?" or, "What would you do if someone said 'blank' about you?" The best way to confront someone about a situation is to try and make them empathize with you. If you can't come to an agreement or understanding with her, then maybe you guys should take a break from being friends for the moment. She may realize what she's missing and change her ways. Or, she may not - either way it will take the pressure off of you. Hope that helps!

Answer 5

Well if that woz me I couldnt give a **** if I made her cry..shez obviously causing some amount of distress for you...I would treat her exactly how she is treating you...this could take long or it could be very short...she will eventually confront U about it an then explain to her an ask questions..if she liked it..did the behaviour seem familiar to her ha ha...an if she runs her mouth beat her ***...if not just leave her ***...and if your other friends follow her then...THEY ARE NOT FRIENDS...JUST SHEEP...I kno itz hard and easy to be said..but itz dilemmas like these which make u stronger in life hunni...an you neva kno THE TABLES TURN...certain ppl may come runnin bk to you...Dont eva let somebody call u a loser etc...friends are here to mk you feel good about yourself and visa versa...THAT AINT NO FRIEND..she may even be jealous..good luck hunni

Answer 6

hey
guess what, ur not alone in that, i have the same problem.
she sounds like she's found some new friends. trust me, she's not worth u crying about her, just dump her. as it happened to me, she could soon find out that u were her only best friend. u don't need to worry too much, this isn't the last time in ur life, it may happen again.
think about it, even if she's gonna say sorry after u talk to her, there's always a chance of the same happening again.
just dump her

Answer 7

You're not alone, I have a friend just like that! Try and avoid seeing her at all times for about two to three weeks and then after that time is up, come back and talk to her and see if she's changed and if after that she doesn't accept you, just forget about her and don't be her friend anymore and tell your friends what was doing to you. If she keeps bugging you, tell the guidance counselor. I hope this helps and I wish you luck. Feel free to email me [e-mail] and tell me how things are going.

Answer 8

It sounds like your friend is insecure about what others think about her. She sounds like she wants to be your friend, but you may not be "popular enough" for her to be seen with. This is so common with girls. She is not treating you like a friend- she wants you to be around if no one else is there for her. She wants to depend on you, but you can't depend on her.
I think you should start looking for another group of friends. If she asks why you are hanging out with other people, Say they are more fun. At your age, girls want to be friends with the girl with the most confidence. It doesn't matter if you are nice. You need to fake your confidence and pretend none of this hurts your feelings. Always try to look like you are having fun. Good Luck!

Answer 9

It sounds like she is going through some insecurities I would say and it sounds like u have done all that u can do 4 your friendship. At this point I would say she's not a friend anymore and get rid of her. Who knows maybe it will be a wake up call 4 her.

Answer 10

Don't be friends with her. The world is full of people who want to put you down. Your friends shouldn't be in that group. A person who makes you feel bad about yourself is not your friend. Friends help you and build you up. This girl is mean and spiteful and you don't owe her anything. Least of all your friendship.