I recnetly started going out with this boy ! But first we gotta backtrack! I wrote him a letter telling him I had a friend that like him! It was a lie but I needed to get to know him a little! SO anyway , my friend named Brittney went to him and told him that I was the friend and that i was the one who like him! He said yes! Now i dont see him with other gurls or nothin! But in the past all my boyfriends have cheated on me and I have been heartbroken so many times that I think that I am kinda insecure ! I need to know how no to be insecure ! Can yall please just give me some advice on how not to be so insecure!
2006-08-22 09:27:24 · 10 answers · asked by Jazzmine 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I do have a very low self esteem level ! DO you think i need to break up with him until I figure out my problems or maybe this relashonshiip wil help!
2006-08-22 09:40:01 · update #1
The only thing you can do is let what happen in your past relationships stay in the past. If you really like this boy and you want what the two of you have to really work you have to start by trusting him. It's not going to be easy considering you have had many broken hearts. But it's a chance you're going to have to take in order to be with him. Keep in mind that sometimes when you take chances they can turn out not the way we want sometimes. But it will be just another lesson learned for us to experience that's called life. Good Luck !!!!
2006-08-22 09:42:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A long story made short...I too was insecure, at a very young age, never really knew why....I eventually married...happily for 20 years...then betrayal ended the marriage a few years later...now that I have all the reason to be insecure, I am not...I had faith in my partner to enjoy 20 years without question...as long as things are going well enjoy them don't allow your insecurity to ruin these moments, and when and if they should become questionable then deal with them and move on...if you don't have faith in your partner its not worth being in the relationship...its the risk we all take for true happiness.
2006-08-22 16:54:15 · answer #2 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should never make a person an example of previous relationships. That was your first mistake. Your second mistake was lying to him right off the bat. You need to put your trust in this guy and not give him any reason to feel that he cannot trust you. Don't analyse everything he does or says. If he says I love you don't ask why. If he buys you something just say thank you.
2006-08-22 16:39:25 · answer #3 · answered by gemone523 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can be with him & still be happy. I have the same type of trust issues, but have been with my man for 5 years.
You have to trust him.. although you have been hurt in the past you must treat the new relationship fairly & trust this guy unless he does something to make you think otherwise.
Also.. have some self esteem . This guy liked you back, so you MUST be a good catch! :)
2006-08-22 16:47:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the dating game has gotten so very far away from it's intended purpose. to find a life partner. dating for fun can break your heart. the reality is, you're always going to get cxrushed if you don't re-work your thinking. playing games, or dating for status, it's all just a merry-go-round. sooner or later, the fairy tale runs out of gas and there you are, feeling screwed. you've been cheated on, wonder why? you ought to look at the reasons you date. what motivates you? just lonely? or do you have a sincere desire to link your life and everything inside you to another person? you have to ask some serious questions. being emotionally mature is essential to a healthy lovelife. be honest with yourself, and look inside yourself for the answers.
2006-08-22 16:40:59 · answer #5 · answered by grumpy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecurity in relationships arises from low self esteem..work on yourself before you tackle a relationship. Without self esteem, there is NO ONE who can prove to you that they are faithful...your opinion of yourself is such that you think they will want others in comparison to you. Sit down, add up all our positive things, negative things. IF in your mind, you come up on the negative side, start doing something personal about it. Change your opinion of yourself, and your opinion of others will change drastically. I do wish you the very best of luck Living with low self esteem sets you up to be a patsy for life's knocks. Don't do that to yourself. Expect the best and you will get the best.
2006-08-22 16:36:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't sabotage a relationship based on past experience. Maybe he had a g/f that cheated or lied would you want him to hold that against you. Think about it. Trust him until you have reason (from him) not to.
2006-08-22 16:51:52 · answer #7 · answered by geni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
learn to trust. just because others cheated doesn't mean he will and secondly don't put your confidence in anyone elses hands. it was not anything with you that made others cheat it was their own issues. just look in the mirror and love yourself for the beautiful person you are and you'll find all the happiness in the world!
2006-08-22 16:37:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to learn to trust. You cannot take what others have done to you out on this new guy. Trust him until he gives you a reason not to.
2006-08-22 16:34:41 · answer #9 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust him but still check on him sometimes
2006-08-22 16:34:44 · answer #10 · answered by Cassey h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋