why is it? we search and search our whole lives to find that special someone and when we do finally find someone we treat them badly and then wonder why they finish the relationship?
2006-08-22 08:27:48 · 10 answers · asked by areyou_looking_atme 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i'm 35 and i messed up big time!!!!!!
2006-08-22 08:50:30 · update #1
People always want what they can't have. Very few are wise enough to treasure what they do have and find contentment in it. In a way that drive creates good things, its why people try to do more and work harder and get more education, but it is devestating to personal relationships. If everyone had been happy with the horse and buggy we wouldn't have cars today. People need to learn to separate personal relationships from the other things in life.
2006-08-22 08:40:38 · answer #1 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a self steem problem. You keep on looking for the perfect one for you and then you:
- Think that is too good to be true
- Think that he deserves someone better than you.
- Always worry that he is going to find someone else.
- Believe that you are not worth of such happiness.
- Are always waiting for something to go bad.
- Give him reasons to break up with you.
- Push him away because you are afraid that he is going to break your heart and leave you anyway, just like the others.
- You are afraid that he may discover that you are not as wonderful as he thinks that you are.
We hit the self destruct button and sabotage the perfect relationship because we are affraid to suffer and because you are unconfident due to low self steem or previous emotional trauma.
You have to work on your issues. You fear failure but then anticipate failure? If you keep on slamming the door on someones face, chances are that that they will eventually leave tired of the mind games.
Remember that whatever happened to you in the past, is not your current partner's fault... so stop punishing him for something that he did not do.
Good luck
2006-08-22 08:51:50 · answer #2 · answered by Blunt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm normally nice about this sort of thing but my hubby is 37 and he just messed up too, stop lying and sort yourself out.Oh ok, nice bit, check out the link and see if you can make something out of your mess.
2006-08-22 10:58:12 · answer #3 · answered by good tree 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
we are afraid....grass is always greener.....somewhere else....meet someone new...don't see all their flaws like we do in our partners....and then we sabotage as a way of getting out.....only later to discover..the new person has flaws too........and the old relationship had good stuff we didn't appreciate.....that is why hindsight is 20/20
2006-08-22 08:48:16 · answer #4 · answered by befuddled 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because after having looked forever for a perfect mate,
after finding they're not perfect,our sub-conscience tells
us to give up and start looking again?We should know better.
2006-08-22 08:38:59 · answer #5 · answered by mitchegen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very good ques. why do you do that i'm curious from the other side of that coin.
2006-08-22 08:36:18 · answer #6 · answered by desayunogratis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a very good age old ?
2006-08-22 08:47:45 · answer #7 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
familiarity breeds contempt
2006-08-22 08:36:12 · answer #8 · answered by charlotte66621442000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are just humans.
2006-08-22 08:41:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
good ?, its sad i think its we dont think we deserve to be happy
so there for we screw it up!!
2006-08-22 08:38:00 · answer #10 · answered by Denise B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋